More Than An Ex-

Francois

We all spend lots of time here giving the lie to the cult known as Jehovah's Witnesses and their cover organization, The Watchtower Bible & Tract Society. Here, the real truth about this dangerous and divisive organization of men is revealed for all who are interested. Long before I showed up here, the Jedi and other advanced members here have given unstinting support for people coming out of "the organization." No doubt this board has provided life saving, life affirming help for many people at their wit's end. You have been life savers.

I think you've done a great job of it.

And I hope I can suggest that we should guard ourselves against becoming so involved in being ex-witnesses that we fail to develop real lives for ourselves, independant philosophies, caring relationships, legitimate methods for contemplation of ultimate truth, and all else that gives meaning to a life with few answers.

That is, there is more to life than being an ex-witness, or an ex-anything else. Indeed, is there really any difference in being a witness and being an ex-witness? Don't you really become just like that which you despise...just a negative image of it?

Is there any difference between a proton and an anti-proton?

I do think we should continue to do what we're doing: warning the public with this very public conversation about a cult little-known outside its own shadowy private precincts; offering emotional support and an outlet for those who have been emotionally, psychologically, and perhaps physically abused; publishing the illogical, specious thinking of the society - its doctrinal flip-flops, theological U-turns, sneering cynical hypocrisies, and outright lies..lies told in supposed service to the God of Truth. We should continue to do these things. But we should guard against allowing these valuable contributions to society to so dominate our lives that we become nothing more than full-time ex-witnesses. We might as well have just stayed in as to allow that to happen.

Let's all get together in regional parties and party down with not one mention of the Borg.

Watcha think?

Francois

TMS

Swa: I think "Yes"!

Mostly I am consumed with life itself, not being an ex-anti-inactive-df'd, da'ad witness.

But when I take my wife her coffee in the morning, if the conversation turns. . . . . .

TMS

Free2Bme

Hi Francoise
Thanks for your post.
It's made me realise that I have become totally obsessive about JW's and I am giving more time and attention to the org now than I ever did when I was in it!
So in a way they have still got me.
I don't like that.
So I am off to get a life and look after my gorgeous hubby and take a course and get on with painting a watercolour just for the hell of it and find the real person who has no resemblance to a JW or an exJW but is just ME.
Ooh this is going to be pretty nerve-racking...

Thanks for jabbing that pin in my ass.

Free2Bme...soon i hope.

Jang

You make good points Francoise .... and it easily happens, but in 20 years I have found that most are alto to start making a life of their own after a couple of years ..... once it is all out of their system they start moving on

Some get caught up in intense anger and get stuck in their grief and this can make recovery take longer.

Then you get those of us who have been in support work for a long time who are well past it and are capable of continuing to give support to the newbies.

If you watch you will see that once a person starts communicating with other x's after about 6 months they show signs of good recovery .... and then they move on over the next year or so until you only see them occasionally. I have been on e-mail support lists for the last 5-6 years and there is a high turnover as people come and go because they are getting past the pain after being able to vent and talk ....

Give people time Francios and they will make the transition .....

JanG

Francois

Yes, JanG, lots of people can and do pass on through. Many, Many however go from one cult to another, from one set of painful experiences to another. In the twenty three years I've been working with exs of one kind or another I've seen so many people leave the JWs and join the Moonies, leave the Moonies and join the JWs, or the Full-Gospel this or that, or the Jim Jones-like organizations. It's very common, too common for comfort. If you only see them leave the JWs and disappear, where have they disappeared to? I could only handle cult de-programming for a half-dozen years and see people coming and goin in both directions - more than once!

In my experience, it pays to begin early inculcating the idea that it's better to stop the pendulum in the middle instead of letting it continue to swing to each extreme over and over and over. It's not healthy.

sf

oh Kontraire for me Franc...I am now AT THIS TIME solely devoted to bring this korrupt, kriminal, snare, racKett KULT to the nations attention. I am one person yes, yet I am mighty! I have a powerful weapon...it's my tongue! And my attitude towards this insane group of men GOVERNING this "flock" is firmly set in place and has a red target button painted on it. The good thing is I now know when to push it. And now is Not the time.

sKally (emoteTIONAL klass)

XJWBill

Billygoat

Since we're resurrecting threads lately, this is one of my favorites that I think deserves being brought back to life.

With that, I fully understand that I have been spending WAY too much time on this board lately. So I might take a vaca for a few days just to see what Life has to offer. If anyone does want to "party down" as Francois mentions, give me a holler and we'll have a talk over coffee or a bottle of wine. I can always be reached at [email protected]

Love y'all,

Andi

More Than An Ex-

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