........................and I read them. Big mistake!
As I read them I felt like the person that wrote them was a pathetic, crawling, stupid, insecure, brain-washed, idiot! I didn't know this person, and liked her even less! She sounded like she was trying to win the elders over, just so she could be back with her spiritual, loving, family, she sounded like she was begging, pleading, selling herself short. She even said she was thankful Jehovah loved her so much he disciplined her this way. She even said, but couldn't have meant it, that she was prepared to try and forgive the pedophile. OMG..........how revolting!
Then, when I put the letters down I felt so disappointed with myself. The fact that I had let these men bully me, that I had made them feel so powerful, that I played their game, and that I had let the inner child in me down. I protected my own children but couldn't protect MY inner child.
But things have changed since then, thank goodness. I have moved on, I am strong again and I won't take crap anymore. I'm wiser too. But it is very scarey when you realise just how much you were under THEIR control, and just how much you thought you know, yet you just didn'tt!
Does anyone out there ever feel like the dub person they were is someone they dislike.............and why?????????? And do you love the person you are now???????????
Cheers, Bliss