In a moment of deep contemplative spirtual reflection (as in a mini micro second) it occured to me (perhaps driven by the holy spirit to be found in a bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue Label) that the time of the end has been revealed to me - is so simple to determine, yet hidden from the masses of unbelieving heathens aka the rest of mankind.
I am sure the right reverend canon will support me with this simple expose of bible chronology.
Six thousand years of man's existence on the Earth ended in 1975, but still not the time of the end, 'cause we didn't know how long it was before god became fed up with Adam's fooling around with the animals (disgusted I should well imagine) and decided to give him a mate in his likeness. Goodness knows things would have been simpler if he had have put tits on a mans back.
Since we know that the Israelites determined that a man was not suitable for marriage until thirty years of age, then it is only right that Eve was not given to Adam until he was thirty. 1975 plus 30 years = (holy shit) 2005. The end is nigh!
Time really is short. Excuse me while I sell up my belongings, quit my job and begin preaching. Considering I won't have time to convert the whole world, I will limit my preaching to suitably good looking females aged between 20 and 40 (determined to be the most suitable for the task of populating the new world (or, to quote Frannie "the gnu-whirled" order).
cheeses - of-the-you'd-better-get-your-act-together-class.