Perfectionism

by lriddle80 3 Replies latest jw experiences

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  lriddle80

  Do any of you suffer from perfectionism? I do and it may be the message that JW's put out there. Growing up in that religion, it's all about doing more, field service, meeting attendance, study, conventions, etc. Now, as an adult, I am realizing that I am having to unlearn that I am loved only by what I do. As it turns out, God loves us because of what he did by dying and shedding his blood. He just wants us to spend time with him and get to know him, not constantly work for him like a slave. A famous saying that I have after doing something, "now do you love me?" He wants us to sit at his feet like Mary did, not work and worry like Martha!
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  LongHairGal

  I suffered from perfectionism and OCD after I left the JW religion. Still do, to a small degree, but I have come a long way.

  This is one of the negative effects which shows the religion is downright unhealthy.
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  BlackWolf

  Ive felt the same way sometimes, like nothing I do will ever be good enough for god or my parents. I also have an eating disorder that I struggle with sometimes. But it helps me to go on sites like this that remind me that jws are wrong and that I don't have to be perfect anymore
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  dubstepped

  Oh yeah, I'm a recovering perfectionist and just like an alcoholic I'll always be in recovery. It's too easy to slip back into old patterns. Black and white thinking is a cognitive distortion that is a hallmark of perfectionism, and not much is more black and white than JWs.

  I highly recommend the book "Happier" by Tal-Ben Shahar. That book really saved me from a lot of my perfectionism and helped me change my perception. I read a few others on the subject, but that one always stood out to me.

  You, as you are right now, are enough. JWs teach you that you're never enough. I personally think that the whole concept of God and the Bible was created to control humans, something that perfectionism is all about (control), and since shedding perfectionism I've also shed the JW cult and the need for the Bible/God too.