LOST IN THE STARS
(Voice on an analog telephone)
“Harry? Listen to me - don’t say anything - just listen!
Record everything I’m saying. Do it NOW!”
NOTE: (Voice on phone is unintelligible except to the caller)
Narrative V/O
Everybody calls me Skipper. I’m your brother, Kip.
I’ve been crazy for boats since we were kids.
Never owned one. Couldn’t afford it. You
were into cars. That’s life. We chase our passions.
Long story short - I injured my back and couldn’t do labor for cash on commercial boats any longer. I’m a wretched landlubber.
You don’t ask personal questions. You took me in.
Both of us searching for “meaning” in life.
We got into that cult a few years back and out again. Two lost souls, right? I know you already know this. But here’s the thing: by the time I get back - my personal memory will be wiped clean.
I’ll need to hear this recording to make sense of what happened to me.
This brings us up to date.
If or when I get back to the house after this is over… just let me listen to my voice telling the story. Okay? Listen up!
This is where the story really starts…
Last Wednesday I saw a notice on the bulletin board at the village Pavillion. I couldn’t believe what it said.
It was a 3x5 card with hand lettering:
FREE SAILBOAT
WILL TRADE for services
Easy Does it.
That’s all it said.
Too good to be true - right?
Wrong. There was a P.O. Box address and the name Baphomet.
I haven’t hand-written anything in years but I scribbled a polite response and inquiry.
I offered to trade my services with clear stipulation it can’t be backbreaking work.
I got the first phone call at about 2 a.m. that SAME NIGHT.
I hadn’t even mailed my note yet!
That’s right - crazy already - understand?
Well, I didn’t either. It shook me, honestly.
The phone call was mostly whispering. Raspy whispering.
Strange accent. Foreign.
The guy (I guess it was a guy) said he was called Baphomet.
He has a wasting illness and a sailboat but he can’t use it any longer.
He needs to get some errands done and that’s where my ‘service’ comes in.
The conversation went like this.
(Voice on phone:)
Baphomet:
This is private. Please understand. I need you to fetch something for me.
A simple thing. If you do this - the sailboat is yours.
I’ll provide instructions in your language on how to sail it.
One stipulation. Extremely important.
You can’t allow anyone else to sail the boat and you must never sell it.
Security measures.
(Kip to Harry on phone:)
I tried asking questions but he kept evading. He told me how to get to his place.
It’s about a five-hour drive. He gave me map coordinates. Ya know?
Satellite coordinates for precision. How about that?
I made notes as he spoke and when I finished …
He suddenly… Just silence. Hung up.
I shook it off and went back to bed. Thought maybe I dreamed it.
So, I fell asleep immediately. The phone woke me again about an hour later.
Baphomet again.
He apologized. Said he fainted.
He needed to explain that he just ‘somehow’ knew I could be counted on
To be discreet.
He’s some kind of a foreign dignitary with diplomatic immunity but
Double-crossed by…um… I think he said ‘security services.
FBI maybe?
They made promises. Broke ‘em, too.
He said they wanted his boat. But he’d never give it to them.
He’d refused no matter what they did to him.
Crazy, I know. I thought so too.
But his voice… so much pain in it. Sincerity. Desperation.
He was mistreated.
The government poisoned him. Left him for dead after searching his property for 24 hours. His “sailboat” was hidden.
He woke up in a ditch and hadn’t been the same since then.
All this is insane - but not unbelievable.
(Muffled phone response)
Well - I don’t have an explanation -but- I absolutely believed him.
He really got into my head or maybe my heart. He reminded me of Dad for some crazy reason.
(Muffled phone response)
Never mind all that. Water under a bridge. Try and focus!
Baphomet went silent again and in an hour - well - another phone call.
He sounded more desperate each time. He begged me to set out on the road right away.
That’s when I - um- I “borrowed” your spare truck with the hitch. I guess you noticed it was missing.
Anyway, the thing is - I never do things like that. I’m law-abiding. I’m honest.
(Muffled phone response)
Okay.
Boring and strait-laced. You know that by now.
I pulled myself together and set out on the road… arriving five hours later. At half past ten and then spent another hour trying to hone in on the coordinates Baphomet provided.
Okay, Harry. Now brace yourself. It gets truly crazy from here on out.
My cell buzzed and it was him. He said he could see me.
He directed me on foot from where the road ran out.
Thickly wooded area way off the main road. No paths.
It was about then I suddenly got scared - or - maybe came to my senses!
I was so greedy for that damned free sailboat - I never stopped to question my sanity meeting a stranger in some dark wooded landscape miles from the nearest town.
Think of the horrifying possibilities!
(Muffled phone response)
Serial killer maybe? A madman with an ax?
Unibomber maniac?
But all that ended abruptly when I rounded a hill and saw his …um…I guess I should tell you this now.
Bit of a shocker.
Just don’t stop recording this. No matter how lunatic I sound.
I’m not a prankster or practical joker.
I saw his ‘sailboat’ and just about fainted dead away.
Are you sitting down?
(Muffled phone response)
(Clears his throat and swallows)
Baphomet’s sailboat wasn’t a seagoing vessel of any description.
(Muffled phone response)
Nope.
(Takes a deep breath)
It…was…a… Flying Saucer!
(Exhales slowly)
(Muffled phone response)
I know. I know. You’re thinking: Drugs! Or I’m drunk.
(Muffled phone response)
No no no. Harry - it’s like pornography - you just know it when you see it.
It was an honest-to-god FLYING SAUCER.
Baphomet was standing next to it and he waved me over.
(Voice on phone)
No. Not at all human.
He’s what UFO nutjobs would call a “GREY”.
(Muffled phone response)
I’m no nutjob!
I’m worn to a frazzle experiencing every human
Emotion intensely for the last 48 hours. I’m open to believing ANY thing now!
I approached him with my jaw hanging down…terrified…and I was shittin’ my pants.
I couldn’t turn away, turn back, or run.
(Muffled phone response)
Why?
A crazy part of me was saying: “That saucer is going to belong to you, Skipper!”
(Switch to flashback conversation)
Baphomet:
I’ll keep this simple for you.
I’m about to fall into a coma.
Just run my errand and perform the ‘service...
I can finish my - my …I actually shouldn’t say anything about my task.
Maybe … I suppose I must …
Do as I ask and the sailboat is yours free and clear and you can indulge your wanderlust. Get lost in the stars like every sailor down through history.
Would you like that, Skip?
Skipper:
Of course, I would. (clears his throat). Always wanted that.
Um - just give me the errand. I’m ready right now.
Baphomet:
We must trust each other. Understand?
I have a drop of this you must swallow.
It resembles quicksilver or mercury as you might say - but it is quite safe.
It makes it possible that you receive my mind into yours.
I’ll be at the helm to navigate.
(Sound of swallow and cough…)
Baphomet:
I guess I should have mentioned just one more thing…
Skipper: (wary)
Well - what?
Baphomet:
When done - we UN-link…it follows that any memory of this will vanish.
Security precaution. To protect you from interrogation.
If you told the truth - you’d be institutionalized. If you are drugged and without memory – different outcomes.
You’ll have about an hour to prepare for the memory loss. Do what you need to do to clue yourself afterward.
Skipper:
I don’t really understand what you’re saying - but…
Let’s just get this done. I’m ready.
Baphomet:
I’m what you’d call a Universal Ethics Officer; like a policeman. I’m the last of my…
Species, my world, my race. I’m after a criminal. He must be executed. That's your job. Just bring me his corpus.
Skipper:
Corpse?
Baphomet:
Oh. Sorry. Yes, his corpse. Scoop that up in a special bodybag and tag it. Return here.
Skipper:
Wuh! - I have to confess…at this moment you’re terrifying me.
This is way beyond anything Possible to believe, understand, or perform.
Baphomet: (ignoring his protest)
I will eat his fleshy parts and rejuvenate myself: it repairs my own vitality, within the hour.
Don’t worry about your competence. I’ll instruct you mentally.
ME - guiding you - will extract his life essence. You already understand this from your previous training.
Skipper:
I don’t know how to kill anybody or anything. I have no training!
Baphomet:
You’re just a passenger. A fellow Thetan.
Skipper:
Thetan? That cult bullshit? What are you saying?
Baphomet:
There is a bit of fact in every fable. Knowing what’s what - well…let’s say
It’s above your pay grade. Let’s get going. Relax. The liquid you swallowed
Is beginning to Link us.
Skipper:
NO! Oh -oh -ohhhh. (groaning) I - I - Ahhhh (incredible sound of pleasure)
Baphomet:
Take a deep breath. Let go.
I’ve been after this miscreant for longer than you could ever imagine. Now it’s time for the reckoning.
(Phone call to Harry continues)
Still there Harry …ARE YOU?
(Loud response muffled on the telephone)
Good. Keep listening.
My next experiences are indescribable.
But - I gotta try!
Unbelievable sensations inside my body seized me and I guess - you might describe it - that I was hypnotized - but no Bullying or even a brutal experience. More like lucid dreaming and a nightmare.
(Muffled response on the telephone)
Yes - I remember the cult.
(Voice muffled on phone)
Yes, all that Tech we were taught.
(Muffled phone response)
Baphomet? Well, He has access to everybody’s auditing sessions and personal confessions.
(Muffled phone response)
Yes. From the cult.
He chose me. I’m the most qualified.
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
Harry! We left for the same reasons. We have integrity, that’s why.
They are liars determined to control people everywhere and pretend it’s religious philosophy.
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
The murder?
I did do it - him using me to do it.
Let me finish telling you. Now shut up and listen!
My mind is starting to drift…
The craziest part comes next.
Ready for this?
I murdered the head of our old cult! Not murder- wrong word. I executed Justice.
Universal Justice.
(Sound of loud voice on phone)
Shut up, Harry.
Just listen!
Xenu, Harry, it was HIM - he was running things - everything like some Moriarity,Blofeld. Mastermind cult leader.
None of us realized the cult’s human leader was the ventriloquist dummy. He wasn’t really running operations, creating pathology. He was being controlled. Surrendering for the power. Going along for the wild ride.
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
Don’t you get it, Harry? Miscavige was Xenu!
(Muffled phone response)
David Miscavige - the leader of Scientology!
Aren’t you listening to a word I’m saying?
Baphomet has been chasing him down like a Nazi hunter throughout history
As he pops up here and there.
Different times and places; different identities.
(Muffled phone response)
No. WE KILLED him inside Celebrity Center.
The greatest tyrant in the history of the Universe!
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
No corpse. Baphomet ate him! No corpus for evidence.
Said he tasted like chicken.
(Muffled phone response)
Corpus delicti, in Western law, is the principle that a crime must be proved to have occurred before a person can be convicted of committing that crime.
(Muffled phone response)
You did what? Did you call the F.B.I?
Why would you do that?
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
No no no, Harry!
That’s the LIE - that’s the expected pushback - the spin Xenu uses to control the authorities.
They do his bidding.
Baphomet is the last hero and he’s been left for dead.
Xenu almost won.
But now WE stopped him! Or should I say we stopped
His current cult incarnation.
He’ll pop up someplace else. He always does.
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
The F.B.I. called you? Why did you cooperate?
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
Harry - I hear something outside. Hold on while I look.
(Footstep Sounds - window blinds and gasp…more steps)
Harry, they’re here!
I gotta get out of here before they do to me what
They did to Baphomet.
(Sound of muffled voice on phone)
How?
I’ll tell you how - in my new sailboat - that’s how!
Watch for me. I’ll be there quicker than you could –(LOUD CRASH)
They’re breaking in Gotta go!
(Sounds of indistinct humming, whirring. Loud crash and breaking window as a FLASH BANG grenade goes off. Men’s voices.
(Telephone voice:)
This is agent Scofield, who’s on this line?
Harry:
Where’s my brother - is he okay?
Scofield:
There’s nobody here.
Harry:
Did he get away?
Scofield:
You mean that “thing” - that Grey? No. We disposed of that yesterday.
Who’s been telling you about this? Say nothing to anyone till we get there.
We’ve got your number on this cell. Stay where you are. We’re coming to pick you up.
(Scofield’s POV> listening to Harry’s phone background:)
Harry:
Skipper! That was fast. Very fast.
(Footsteps closer to phone)
Harry’s voice:
Skip’s okay, Scofield. Gotta go.
Scofield:
STAY WHERE YOU ARE!
(Harry on phone:)
Sorry, Agent Scofield.
You won’t find us.
We’re off on a quest for the white whale.
The solar wind in our sails. All “clear”.
We’ll be…Lost in the Stars.
THE END (or is it?)
Scientology's Creation Myth
https://www.learnreligions.com/scientologys-galactic-overlord-xenu-95929
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAfdPFWiF9U