The CATERPILLARGEDDON
An eyeball rolled under the tool cart and stared fixedly into sightless shadows.
An impossibly large, bug-like creature lay on its back as the final death twitch of primitive nerve endings faded.
Next to the shed carapace were human skin shards and bone fragments. An odd series of quick transformations had torn each stage apart leaving disgusting artifacts of mostly bug part, then, human scraps.
Stumbling toward the basement stairs on wobbly legs there staggered a weird human replacement. This uncanny thing coughed up a viscous waxy substance as its voice box simulated a modulated word or two: “Wuh. Wuh. Wa. Wat. Watch. Watchtower!”
_____
In the floor above the creature, on the other side of the cellar door, ordinary human sounds intermixed with typical television commercials, clinking dishes in a kitchen sink and the distant barking of neighborhood dogs.
An outside door slammed and footfalls sounded overhead across the ceiling of the basement garage as the pupae on human legs completed its final transformation. With a snap and crackle of joints in place--this wretched abomination reached out unsteadily for an old pair of overalls hanging on a nearby peg next to outlined tools and calendar with its nude pinup smiling alluringly at the monster who paused and leered back.
Again, muffled voices on the floor overhead:
"Get ready for the meeting, Markie, your Dad should be home any minute now and he has to have the bathroom a good thirty minutes to himself."
"Aw, Mom, can I please stay home? I've got tons of homework. I have to raise my grades or I'll flunk algebra."
"No! You missed the WatchTower Study Sunday with this same excuse. GET READY NOW!"
The door to the basement swung open with a hearty thump.
A wide-eyed, not too human form lurched in the doorway.
"Honey, I'm home", the witless bug croaked using the familiar voice of their devoured father. A faltering smile crawled up the side of its face and foundered in a frozen grin.
"I didn't hear you drive up! How was work?"
The bug-man staggered toward its "wife" and stiffly opened uncertain arms for an embrace. There was a shiver and hiccup, followed by the words: "Watch Tower!....Watchtower."
The woman's expression quickly distorted and she pulled back reflexively. A scowl distorted her features.
"You haven't been drinking, have you? You promised!"
The bug-thing awkwardly embraced her again rather mechanically, then ambled over to the couch, toppling heavily onto the floor instead.
"Watch Tower!....Watchtower?"
"I put your copy next to the bed......Frank---did you hear me? Have you been drinking again?"
Her brow furrowed and color flushed into her cheeks as she removed her apron and headed for the hall closet. She quickly opened the door and stepped in where some sort of search took place as things clattered to the floor.
"No---drinking. Not again. I promised."
The human brain had been absorbed by now and millions of tentative calibrations were accessing neural pathways as instinctive patterns began working their way into semi-clarity.
The man-thing righted itself suddenly from its sprawl on the carpet.
Now confident, it sprang to attention unfurling its human tongue like a cat with a fur ball.
"Evelyn, I have not been drinking! An alternate explanation is now occurring to me. There is a carbon MOE-nox-IDE leak in my car-mobile causing confusion....."
The eyes rolled back inside its head with a flutter and jitter, then back down like cherries in a slot machine.
"Correction! Evelyn. Plausibly, I have NOT been drinking! There is a carbon monoxide leak in my AUTOmobile and it caused me dizzy to be."
The human mouth soured into a twist and then relaxed into a natural human smile.
The woman backed out of the closet and slammed the door abruptly.
Turning on her heel toward her mock-husband she squinted. She was carefully appraising him with narrowed brows--then, started to say something. She stopped herself and pursed her lips thoughtfully.
"Okay. Supper is almost ready, Frank."
"Our Markie is here?"
Bug-man-head tilted like a dog listening to something beyond human earshot.
"What is with you, Frank?"
The woman placed her hands on her hips and stood pensively.
Anger was tightening her chest and she was barely managing to fight it.
"You say you haven't had a drink. Fine. Are you dizzy from car fumes? Well, you might need a doctor.”
"Doctor physician? Not needed! I'm for bath and bathing and supper eating is next for me."
The hulking figure waddled off toward the bedroom like a two-year-old with its diaper full.
The woman shook her head and exhaled slowly and miserably.
She picked up the telephone and punched in some familiar numbers while keeping a wary eye on the bedroom door which had been closed and opened and closed again comically--as though Frank had never used a door before.
"Brother Dave? It's me, Evelyn Carmichael . . . yes, thank you. Actually, no. Frank and I are having a problem . . . again. Yes, that's right. Can we sit down with you and the brothers after the meeting tonight? Fine. Okay, I'll tell him. Bye."
Frank-thing opened the bedroom door dressed in a non-matching suit coat and fisherman waders. A knotted necktie dangled off to the side crookedly.
"Frank--I called Brother Dave and----what in the world are you doing with that on? Do you think it's funny?"
The mock-husband concentrated on an answer as its eyes flickered about like the old Felix the Cat clock in the attic.
"The answer to your query is....YES! I'm obvious funny! I'm a really funny person. And I make the laughter to come......too."
Bug-thing opened a self-satisfied smile-thing.
Frank-thing’s "wife" closed her eyes and steadied herself once more and walked straight to the bedroom and began packing her suitcase.
"Watch Tower! Watchtower? Watch Tower!"
The bug’s words became disjointed. Brain synapses had not quite matched.
The bedroom door opened and Evelyn's eye stared from behind the narrow slit. Her ongoing confusion reached new heights.
"Hey, Dad--you can have the bathroom now----what the F! Why are dressed like that?" The son, Mark, was standing with a towel around his waist with an astonished expression on his freckled face.
"You are Markie."
Dad-thing nodded with great insight.
"I'm funny guy. You are laughing now to see me, okay?"
The 15-year old's face blanked momentarily until something clicked deep inside his mind and the "explanation" popped into view. It was not a happy answer.
"Aww, Dad---not again. You promised! You're gonna get disfellowshipped this time. You know you will."
Tears started to well up in the boy's eyes as he pouted and sniffed.
"Markie, I'm doing the right thing in the right place. Now is the time."
"What are you talking about, Dad??"
The boy wiped his sleeve across his runny nose as he stared at his "father's" face uncomprehending.
"WatchTower delivery! Door to door. Caterpillar eggs! Soon, your whole world will convert to our way of life!”
The bedroom door opened again and a resolute Evelyn came marching out with two suitcases fully packed.
"Come with me, Markie.....now!"
She gritted her teeth and squinted her eyes with startling ferocity.
"Evelyn wife--the Kingdom Hall is for us tonight. The Message will be clear and I will make ready! One in each family. Door to door....you'll see.."
The boy began whimpering again. His mother dropped the suitcases to embrace him. Placing her hands on either side of her son's face she pulled his gaze toward her and leaned in close so that he would understand every word.
"Your father promised he would not drink and he has lied to us . . .again. We are going over to Gramma Kenny's until the brothers can sit down with your Dad and work this out . . .again."
The boy immediately nodded and refused to look in the direction of the "father" again.
"Do I need to pack my suitcase, Mom?"
Father-thing's expression switched to alert and alarm. Neural connections and brain patterns transmitted signals of mission threatening distress throughout the awkward body.
"Plan B! Come, Evelyn wife and Markie son--I have a great surprise for both of you in the basement garage!"
The woman and her son experienced a chill pervading the room as though a momentary winter lived in Frank’s words.”
"What---Frank? What Surprise?
"My surprise solves all problems! Special Gift! Come see--come now!”
Warily, the mother and her boy watched as Frank-thing strutted over to the garage door and ceremoniously opened it.
His enormously inviting smile beamed across a disarming face as he waved them both toward the stairs.
"Fun. Great Fun. Big changes to come! Amazing transformation. Happiness for all!”
Markie exchanged doubtful looks with his mom and she shrugged as though fate were a thing to be followed however blindly. Something might make sense of this day after all.
"All right, Frank. All right."
Three figures from the room onto the stairs shuffled solemnly as the door closed silent as a coffin lid.
_____
Somewhere in that evening’s twilight dogs barked with unusual ferocity. Street traffic wooshed and honked, as usual, drowning the piercing screams--terror filled outcries from a mother and her child. All this passed unnoticed in the November sunset.
The neighborhood went ominously still.
An hour later the family car disgorged its three occupants in front of the Middledale Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses.
Frank-thing, Evelyn-thing, and Markie-thing waddled up the steps clutching their Bible in one hand and a small container of centipede eggs in the other.
Brother Dave greeted the "family" with his best fake-smile.
Elder Dave leaned in toward the Evelyn creature
.
"I'm sure we can work things out with all of you," he whispered in Evelyn-thing's ear.
Mom-doppelganger cocked her head to the side. "Watch Tower!”
The presiding Elder's eyes glimmered with alien delight.
He nodded knowingly.
"Oh yes! Watch Tower!"
Four foul things huddled in front of the meeting hall exchanging the mission code with great enthusiasm.
Meanwhile, at Brooklyn headquarters, a special meeting of the Jehovah’s Witness Governing Body had convened.
On the long conference table, various canapes of leafy, tasty tidbits were nibbled, sampled, crunched and ingested.
The centipede eggs went entirely unnoticed as they were washed down with ginger ale and a belch or two.
_____
Within a few months, a New World order would be completed.
Nobody on earth would suspect how the journey from the Pleiades to world conquest had been set up, disguised as Divine communication and laid out with precision.
Well...almost.
There had been unavoidable delays.
Now, in 2017, all humans on planet earth could finally experience the well-publicized end of human existence. Operation Caterpillargeddon.
A small elite body of invasion forces: part celestial caterpillar and part absorbed humans transformed in the twinkling of an eye Surely the remnant would, in the fullness of time, transform one last change into butterflies: all would become monarchs!
"Brothers, let us begin! We shall distribute our gift basket of Food at the Proper Time!"
The tiny gift baskets contained a delicious jar filled with honey glazed caterpillar eggs.
For once, there would be no need to donate money... .only one's human body.
The moment of final rapture.
-End-