My JW Update

by jdash 6 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  jdash

  Hey guys! How are y'all? For me, things are doing better, you could say. Ever since I been on here, posting, and whatnot, I have been even more enlightened, if that's the correct word. I've got so much help and advice from ones on this forum.

  So life so far is getting better. I've got things falling in place, even though my grandmother says otherwise. Some things I could still work on. Since my grandmother knows about how I want no part of the religion, she basically is telling me that I am immature and a hypocrite because "I promised to do his will and I dedicated my life to Jehovah." She still tells me to read articles by the organization, just like this weeks watchtower article. Which actually says, "Baptism is a requirement for Christians, and it is an essential step to gaining salvation." Personally, there is a lot of things mentioned in the article that is weird and confusing, probably just mind-manipulating. Seems as the organization wants you to think the world is a hell hole with nothing good for you.

  Some days my depression gets to me because I know I'm going to be shunned because of my decision. I was researching and found 'Religious Trauma Syndrome.' Whether it's a real syndrome or not, that is actually what i'm experiencing, even though I haven't left yet.

  http://journeyfree.org/rts/rts-its-time-to-recognize-it/
  

  My belief in a lot of doctrines taught by the organization has withered. I have no belief in "Satan." No belief in the "Resurrection." Just to name a couple. I kind of have took on that personality of, "I'm here for a good time, not a long time."

  293 days till I leave, basically almost 10 months.

  Thanks for reading my drawn out 17 year old feelings, lmao.
• 

  Giordano

  Good to hear from you Jdash.

  Thanks for sharing this information about 'Religious Trauma Syndrome' by Marlene Winell, Ph.D.

  I've cherry picked some of her observations. She brings 25 years, in her practice, working with this type of Trauma.

  
  

  But religious indoctrination can be hugely damaging, and making the break from an authoritarian kind of religion can definitely be traumatic. It involves a complete upheaval of a person’s construction of reality, including the self, other people, life, the future, everything. People unfamiliar with it, including therapists, have trouble appreciating the sheer terror it can create and the recovery needed.

  Another obstacle in getting help is that most people with RTS have been taught to fear psychology as something worldly and therefore evil. It is very likely that only a fraction of people with RTS are even seeking help. Within many dogmatic, self-contained religions, mental health problems such as depression or anxiety are considered sins. They are seen as evidence of not being right with God. A religious counselor or pastor advises more confession and greater obedience as the cure, and warns that secular help from a mental health professional would be dangerous.

  At present, raising questions about toxic beliefs and abusive practices in religion seems to be violating a taboo, even with helping professionals.
  But mind-control and emotional abuse is actually the norm for many large, authoritarian, mainline religious groups. The sanitization of religion makes it all the more insidious. When the communities are so large and the practices normalized, victims are silenced.

  Individuals can experience RTS in different ways depending on a variety of factors. Some key symptoms of RTS are:
  

  • Confusion, difficulty making decisions, trouble thinking for self, lack of meaning or direction, undeveloped sense of self
  • Anxiety being in “The World,” panic attacks, fear of damnation, depression, thoughts of suicide, anger, bitterness, betrayal, guilt, grief and loss, difficulty with expressing emotion
  • Sleep and eating disorders, substance abuse, nightmares, perfectionism, discomfort with sexuality, negative body image, impulse control problems, difficulty enjoying pleasure or being present here and now
  • Rupture of family and social network, loneliness, problems relating to society, personal relationship issues./

  http://journeyfree.org/rts/rts-its-time-to-recognize-it/

  Once again thank you jdash for sharing.

  Part 2: Understanding RTS: Trauma from Religion

  Part 3: Understanding RTS: Trauma from Leaving Religion
• 

  DesirousOfChange

  Some days my depression gets to me because I know I'm going to be shunned because of my decision.

  Have you given official notice (Letter of DA, for example) that will lead to your shunning? If not, I'd still say don't do it! There is no advantage for you to do so. It "forces" people to shun you that would not do so otherwise.

  Go back and read the advice from your first post: https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/5658281419735040/what-do-do?page=2

  ALOT of sincere, helpful comments there.

  I'd ask you, what kind of plans have you made for when you are 18? I know that when all of us guys turn 18 and the testosterone is ruling our reasoning, we (males) tend think we are immortal and are set to conquer the world. Be advised, it is (or at least an be) a cruel world. Not the bad or "worst ever" World conveyed by the Watchtower, but it's tough to be on your own. So......I hope you have done some serious planning so you are not overly dependent on others.

  Did you get a job?

  Did you get a car (and all the things that go with in, ie, insurance)?

  Do you have a place to live when you leave your grandparents' home?

  What kind of plans have you made for your long term future? College? Trade school?

  I don't mean for this to sound negative. I just want you to be looking at thing realistically. We all here want you to succeed!

  Good luck!

  Doc
  
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  jdash

  Thanks Giordano.

  And DoC, no I haven't turned in a letter of DA or anything. But I understand where you are coming from, being confined from the world for my teenage years has made me want a lot. But I do plan on attending college after high school. I'm getting a job soon. I don't have car yet, still saving up. Thanks a lot !
• 

  scratchme1010

  My belief in a lot of doctrines taught by the organization has withered. I have no belief in "Satan." No belief in the "Resurrection." Just to name a couple. I kind of have took on that personality of, "I'm here for a good time, not a long time."

  293 days till I leave, basically almost 10 months.

  Thanks for reading my drawn out 17 year old feelings, lmao.

  Glad to hear that you are doing well. Thank you for sharing.
• 

  humbled

  she basically is telling me that I am immature and a hypocrite because "I promised to do his will and I dedicated my life to Jehovah."
  

  Tell her that if you married a person who you discovered was a child molester or pathological liar you would every right to leave /divorce. It would not mean you did not believe in marriage —it would just mean that you don’t believe you have to be bound to a lying monster for the rest of your life

  And,Of course, you don’t have to “remarry” at all.🙃😳❤️💤
• 

  Whynot

  I highly recommend this book: The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse by David Johnson and Jeff Van Vonderen. The book explains in detail how religious leaders manipulate and weigh you down in guilt and shame and how it affects you. It also offers advice in how to break free and overcome the damage done