Just an observation after being out about 5 years and family

Crazyguy2

I think this can be said about all religions and cults. People are in them and want to be in them do to social reasons more then anything else. One prime example is my oldest boy. I had pretty much woken him up to ttatt and religion in general. I was careful not to share to much in an apostate way just facts , history etc about the cult and then some info about how paganism came into Christianity. He was about to a non believer saying that gods were just made up etc.

Then came the influences of the people from his congregation first a fishing friend then an elder takes him out on his boat then of course all the gatherings then in time a couple more friends he has things in common with. Out the door goes anything non JW and now he’s a believer and his dad his just an apostate.

The rest of the family is the same way, it’s about the friends and the gatherings etc.. It reminds me of the cooking a frog illustration where one puts the frog in normal temp water and slowly turns it up. Before you know it the frog is dinner. So sad that the people can be brainwashed so easily. A rabbi once said “ give me the boy until he’s 9 and I’ll give you the man”.

JW GoneBad

Crazyguy2 don't give up hope on all the seeds you've planted...as the Bible states...water and tend to the soil as need-be...throw-in a good measure of patience and your boy will one day tell you how much he values/valued your parenting skills.

Don't forget how low the retention rate is with youth among the JWs!👍

DesirousOfChange

He'll likely see the love bombing dry up if he is a normal teenager and gets caught sneaking a beer, or a puff, or a little nookie, something the JW's see as grossly immoral vs right of passage for a young guy growing up.

Hopefully he'll resist getting dunked.

The greatest revenge is living a happy & successful life!

Giordano

It's True but it's the same with a lot of high control groups............ being in that "club" is more important then reasoning a different path.

In the witness world, the corporate world, even the military world we only know ourselves by what others say about us.

When the saying turns critical we start to see how hollow those beliefs become.

We have all been motivated by conditional friendships and praise that comes from people praising your submission to the cause.

ToesUp

Yes, it is frustrating to watch. I believe JW's NEED others in the org to survive. They are scared of their own thoughts.

Typically what happens is something happens in THEIR lives that impacts them personally and then the find out who their "friends" are. Some people have to touch the fire and feel that it is hot. Others know it is hot and stay away. I like the boiling frog analogy that someone else posted. It is so true.

We have watched our family experience abuse within the org all of our lives. They go back and make the excuse, "they are imperfect men." I really think they are scared to be without it. They have invested too many years to leave.

I hope one day your son can see it for himself.

blondie

DOC, most jws do not wake up until the true underlying meanness in the WTS is directed towards them personally. Before they could make up excuses and put the blame on the other individual.

A sister I know asked 2 elders, how often would they go to a place if certain individuals came up and slapped them hard in the face every time they saw them. Eventually you would have to get out of slapping range. The same was how she felt going to the KH and being emotionally slapped every time she did. They had nothing to say about that example.

In time if it gets painful enough, he may realize the only way to make the abuse stop, is to leave, get out of slapping range.