Looking back at it, it was shameful to treat human beings worse than a way we would treat a dog! Ignore people, treat them as dead...,it's so awful. 😞
One of My BIGGEST Regrets as a JW Was How I Accepted Dealing With Disfellowsipped Ones
by minimus 6 Replies latest jw friends
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just fine
Agreed, now that I am out, I am ashamed I ever treated anyone that way.
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Bud Stars
It never felt right. I finally had to obey my well-trained conscience after agreeing to shun my mother for almost 8 years. She died less than a year later. Probably my biggest regret in my life.
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undercover
I've probably told this before, but a significant change in my attitude about JW rules came about when I shunned a guy I grew up with at his father's funeral.
I did as I was supposed to, and afterwards felt terrible. I asked myself why I felt so bad for doing the right thing. Then it hit me - I didn't do the right thing. I did the wrong thing. It was wrong to shun a friend I had known all my life at the lowest point of his life.
That was the last time I shunned DFd ones. Even though I was still 'in' and active for some years after that, I had made the decision that despite the WTS stance on shunning, I was going to follow Jesus' example on how to treat people, and not the Governing Body's.
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ambersun
This is exactly how I feel. As a child I was always taught to be kind and polite to everyone, and my first experience of shunning was at my very first meeting! I was ordered to shun a girl just two years older than me, just a teenager, who was disfellowshipped for having a baby. I had to watch her struggling with her tiny baby while all the sisters, including her own mother, ignored her. I wasn't even a JW at that stage, I was just someone's bible study. It still upsets me to this day, along with all the others I shunned over the years, just following orders. When me and hubby were fading and met a disfellowshipped brother while we were out one evening, it was wonderful to ignore the shunning rule and we spent two very happy hours chatting with him and catching up with news etc.
Shunning is completely wrong and I could never go back for that reason alone.
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minimus
Shunning violates every Christian principle of love. Because I was an elder for many years I was able to talk to disfellowshipped people and generally tried to be encouraging and positive. But when I look back at it all, I cannot help but feel that I blindly followed rules of an organization instead of showing normal human kindness to a depressed soul. I do not believe that Jesus Christ would ever treat human "creatures " as Jehovah's Witnesses do.....Shame on anybody that treats their fellow man as if they don't even exist!
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scratchme1010
Looking back at it, it was shameful to treat human beings worse than a way we would treat a dog! Ignore people, treat them as dead...,it's so awful. 😞
The good thing about humans and relationships is that some may be mended. I felt exactly the same way about they way I treated some disfellowshipped people. Later I saw them and some I was able to talk to and let them know that the WT attitude and practice of shunning is something I no longer believe in. Some, sadly were still in "JW mode" and felt like they shouldn't be talking to me, and one person told me to stay away from him because he was planning on going back.
So don't feel bad because in the end, you may not be able to salvage anything, and also, some people are in fact assholes, disfellowshipped or not.