Early morning rambles and rants ::long::

by jonnydangerous 6 Replies latest jw experiences

  • jonnydangerous
    jonnydangerous

    Damn, why does Morpheus' line from the original "Matrix" keep reverbating in my head?

    "I'm sure you're feeling a bit like Alice... tumbling down the rabbit hole?"

    I feel as if my life is coming towards some sort of apocalypse.... Its been a long culmination of events, as apocalypses are...9 years in the works.... but somehow I feel good about coming to this point in my life. Kinda like when Neo first got reinserted into the Matrix aboard the Nebuchadnezzar.... a SHOCCCCK!!! then its like.... whoa.... calm and peaceful. Right now I think the shock period is going to last a little longer than I had hoped, but alas, all great tribulations forge stronger survivors.... Strange how much religion can turn your entire world upside down. Ever since my first time I was introduced to the "evil" that is "apostate literature" (and criticized and chastized and lectured,) it has felt as if I've been spiraling upward. I find that strange even myself, as one would think that losing such an important foothold in life as religion would generally lead to a downward spiral.... I guess I'm lucky or something. I cant even count how many times I've heard over the years of being a "Witness" that there's "nothing out in the world".... "it's a dead end" etc. etc. But these things come to my mind when I think of the people that said them.... where are they today? Are they really any better off than they were when they were disfellowshipped? In all the cases that I can recount... the answer is no. I mean... to the exclusion of them feeling socially accepted and having their hopes and dreams built up by the vast smoke machine that is the WT society, they really haven't gone anywhere as people. Maybe they stopped smoking crack or having wild orgies... thats progression for sure. But progression is a constant thing... and its something that a lot of the people I've seen havent done. I dont know... maybe I'm being a little harsh in my judgements. Instinct is kicking me now and saying that I am... and that I am no better, and I dont claim to be any better. I guess that analysis comes from the person in me that has been freed from the vast illusory empire that we call Jehovah's Witnesses. That person is constantly changing, being that for so long, it was held back. Bound into a static way of thinking, a static way of life... go to school, go to meetings 3 times a week, field service for 2 hours on the saturdays (repeat). Be sure to read plenty of literature to keep that way of thinking and faith in "Jehovah" up! (repeat) Nah... it wasnt working.

    I heard my girlfriend say the saddest statement I'd ever heard... she told me that when she was questioning and doubting... in order to refind her faith, she had to forget everything she'd ever doubted. Go back to thinking like a child again as far as the WTS is concerned. My love for her, will never die, never dim, never diminish... however... she cast a shadow over my heart that day. Making me feel more alone than I ever had. I sit here, feeling tears welling up in my eyes... wondering... should I really leave or not? Even with all that I know, all that I've researched and found out about the WTS...should I go? I dont want to lose her, and I know that if we got married and had kids, our house would be divided. The day I was sitting with her, holding her tightly as she cried upon hearing my statement of exodus from the WT Org, I thought in my heart, how could I be so selfish and evil? Maybe this is the time in my life where I really need to compromise. The time where I really need to put my own feelings aside and consider that, if I truly want a future with this woman, I'll have to reenslave myself to the system of lies and deceit. . . . I dont know if I can do that. I really dont. I've never known anyone in my life like her, and to lose her would turn me into a cold heartless being... someone I know I would hate to be. I could never love again... I know this in my heart. But right now its like go to the Matrix and try to beleive again.... or step out... lose the one you've only ever truly loved.... and try to make your life work from there. Already I can see that end... already I can see the downward spiral of anger, hatred and frustration that my life would turn into. I can hear whoever reading this now saying "That doesnt have to happen" but I assure you that it will. Its like I continue to have this vision of my own personal apocalypse.... each and every day the Event Horizon draws closer and closer... I can feel the events culminating even now....

    Yet, as the Keymaker said... "Another way, there's always another way." I've told her repeatedly about how I find truth in every religion that exists, and I do... I believe they all stem from the one Creator... and get corrupted the farther away in thought, deed, and belief they go from Him.... encrusting themselves in endless mazes of dogma. I've also told her that despite what I know... I never ever want her to say that I undermined her faith.... for I know how earth shattering it can be. However, in light of the dark, ugly truths I've learned... I think I may have to renig on that statement... but I'm so afraid of the consequences that I can't see myself taking action.... in short.... help and advice are in dire need here. Any experiences that you can share with me would be very helpful... please keep in mind that I've known this woman for no short period of time, we have been together in secret for over a year now, after fraternizing casually for about 6-8 months prior to. So breaking the bond we've already established would deal a blow of significant harm to my soul... thank you for reading this far... you must really care.... so my love extends to you for doing so.

    --Nny

  • kj
    kj

    Dang, I don't envy you. I wish I had some words of advice, but I don't really as I have never been a JW. I desperately want to get my Mom out though. One thing is for sure- you can't go on living a lie. Try to help your girlfriend if you can, but don't stay for her sake because it will only end up hurting you both in the end. I've read enough stories here to know that much. Thanks for sharing with us, I will keep you in my prayers.

    kj

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan
    there's "nothing out in the world".... "it's a dead end"

    That's what they have to tell you. If they ever told the truth - that the world is full and rich, the whole damn bunch would bolt. The kingdom hall doors would be swinging in the wind. I find my life has been many times more interesting and fulfilling since I faded, but I don't imagine I will ever be invited to give THAT experience at the district convention.

    I think you have embarked upon a journey of awakening. Paradigm shifts can be frightening, shocking, disorienting - but they are also glorious, delicious, and satisfying.

    Your girlfriend said an insightful thing. She said that they only way to refind her faith was to forget everything that she has learned and think like a child. She has just described a method for self-delusion, almost self-hypnosis. Once you catch on, you just can't do that anymore. And really, can a person be happy if they are knowingly fooling themselves?

  • Valis
    Valis

    jd...breaking up with someone doesn't have to be as earth shattering as you make it out to be. If you really believe that both of your beliefs are not compatible then tell her so and see what she says. I mean really, you say that you have known her for a "long" time, well you should be able to tell her how you feel. If not, you're just pulling your own chain my friend and need to move on with your life as you stated in the beginning of your post. Best of luck and again welcome to the board.

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • zen nudist
    zen nudist

    when I first woke from the BORG trance, my first thought was to continue going to the meetings and pretend so as to not cause too many waves... my wife at the time had a lot of family in and we did not want to lose contact with them over a religion... but the timing was against me. I had been assigned to do a theocratic minstry school talk #4 and I realized that I could not get up and lie infront of an audiance... I think my family DNA is lacking in a dishonesty gene... always a nusance in such situations... BTW nothing teachings you how to lie more than getting married...but thats for another story.

    My then wife as able to carry on the charade for a while, which I learned was not so hard for her, she had been doing that from before we started dating....nearly 2 years to be precise and I never knew until I was ready to exit... and then I was glad that she had deceived me... I would not have married her had I known her true apostate thoughts (^_^)

  • zen nudist
    zen nudist

    as a word of advise

    I am not married now, but it had nothing to do with JWs. It had to do with allowing my wife to see to much of the real me. I could have continued pretending and trying to be what she fantasized I should be, but as I last said, I am not that dishonest... so I let slip my true self one time too many and now I am divorced... but I am not unhappy. I think I would have been more unhappy trying to maintain the lie than I am living the truth of who I am... the world did not end and my sex life did not end either. I now live with two women (^_^) and while things are not as I desire them to be at all times, at least they understand the real me and have not left me over it.

  • Sentinel
    Sentinel

    Someone wise once told me that no decision needs to be made "today". Think it through and sleep on it, and ponder it until the next day.

    The days you need to do this are of your own numbering. Give yourself some space to breath. Don't be in a rush. Let go. You will find your answers.

    /<

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