those NOT raised in the truth

jurs

i was married with 2 small children (an adult) when someone came to my door. i can't figure out how i ever got invoved !!! i can completely see how one can be easily brainwashed being a child and raised as a witness, but i'm angry at myself more than the organization that i was so easily duped... i feel i lost 9 years of my life and missed out on so much for being stupid. when i try to explain to family members why i'm not a JW anymore, i'm embarressed by telling them what i use to believe. thank God Heaven's Gate or a member from Waco Texas cult didn't get to me first. i feel incredible guilt with my kids. i've told them i'm sorry and they are so sweet that they say its ok but i worry about when they are adults and are angry for never having believed in Santa, being freaks at school for nothing......all because i didn't check things out....
jurs

sf

What counts is that you are not there NOW!! And that your kids are not subject to such inKredible "mind kontrol tekhniques". No child should ever have to live a life that, on a daily basis, includes instilling in them just how thorough GOD will kill you if you ever go against him or HIS ORGANIZATION.

Instead of beating yourSELF up, give yourself credit for as much as you've accomplished thus far jur.

Sin.........cerely, sKally

Loki

Don't worry about your children Jurs, I should think they'll be fine. I was a child when my mum was "contacted", but don't blame her for anything, not even now that I'm an adult and have left the borg. It all helped to make up my lifes experiences, and has made me really look into things for myself. These JWs are very convincing people, aren't they?

Cheers

emyrose

Hi Jurs,

Please don't confuse trust with stupidity. Perhaps you were
not exactly brilliant when succumbing to their sophisticated
manipulation, but you were certainly not plain stupid. In my
first congregation they had managed to covert an Ivy League prof. of psychologywhen he was in his late 50's. He was just as
trusting as you, obviously.
As for feeling guilty due to imposing the JW lifestyle on your
children, don't forget that your intentions are what really count.
If you loved them and continue to love them, then you shouldn't worry
about how they will treat you in the future.

Thanks, Emyrose

neyank

Hi jurs,
I feel exactly the same way as you do.
I wasn't raised as a JW either but I fell for their teachings when they came to my door.
I also regret deeply what I put my kids through with the org.
The WTS certainly is good at manipulating people and circimstances.

Don't think you fell for the WTS lies because you were stupid though.
As was already brought out, some verry inteligent people were also duped.
I think many people have gotten involved with the WTS because they wanted to believe
the things they were taught.
It all sounded so easy. Black and white.
We didn't have to think for ourselves.
All we had to do to please God was do as the WTS said.
It was all done for us. All we had to do was follow.

Plus the fact that we had no way of checking the WTS out.
Computers weren't available to everyone when I became involved with them.
I don't think there was much written info. on the WTS either.

So I think it was much easier for the WTS to recrute new members from all walks of life
up until a few years ago.
Now we have the computer as well as books written by people that were involved with
the WTS first hand.

So don't beat yourself up to badly because of the WTS.
We can't change the past but we can control our future.

neyank

TR

I was 1 month into my marriage when I got suckered. My wife would have none of it!(good girl!) To this day I wonder how we stayed together. Actually, after our first born, I honestly think my wife stayed just for the support for her and the kid. After she became accustomed to my religious practices, we started to get along better, but not nearly as well as when I left. Really, I don't think she loved me anymore after I became a witness. I wasn't the guy she married. Sadly, I fantasized about leaving her and finding a JW wife. Thank God I didn't do that! Fortunately, we rekindled our romance after I left the borg.

I was in for ten years. My kids have all but forgot what the meetings were about. It's been 7 years since I left.

So, jurs, like the others said, thank goodness you are where you are now! I'm glad!

TR

"Kults Suck"

Francois

Jurs, I understand where you're coming from. I would say, "I feel your pain," but that's already been used.

My daughter, Rachel, the light of my life, my beautiful, intelligent, innocent, bright-eyed...

Hemmmmmmmm. Um. Right. Anyway, we were in the Borg when she was born. And we were out by the time she was six. Rachel awoke every morning with a kiss for me, and a big hug, and next - every day - was the smiling question, "Daddy, is it the new world yet?" I think she was looking forward to playing with all the animals.

How I shrivel inside each time I remember that scene. How guilty I feel to this day, 24 years later, to recall taking ANY of her little life and wasting it at a Kingdom Hall. Out in service. At books studies. At assemblies. Getting ready to produce a cookie-cutter young woman. Forcing exemplary behavior at meetings and the other activities I listed.

But Rachel is a devoted daughter, and considerate. She says she remembers lots of that stuff, but mainly she remembers things far differently than do I (and likely the same applies to you). We see the situation from the perspective of guilty fathers. She saw it then as a time to be with her little friends. Yes, she had to squirm for two hours, but the payoff was big, big, big to her little way of estimating things.

And besides, nothing is quite like the love between daughters and loving fathers. She tells me I'm wasting my time, and feeling bad for nothing. She loved being with her daddy no matter where we were. And she sat in my lap through every meeting, every book study, every assembly. And that's what I try to remember when I'm beating myself up about the Borg.

Never again. And I'm going to do all in my power to keep any other fathers from feeling this same sad feeling for the same sad reasons.

You're a good man, Jurs. Or you wouldn't be worrying about it at all.

Francois

thinkers wife

Jurs and all others,
As a child who was raised in the "truth" I just want to say, I do not blame my parents in any way!! They did the best they could with what they had. And as a family, aside from the Witnesses, I have a lot of good memories.
I try to look at the good things my parents gave me and ignore any of the negative things involved. I think most children grow up and think that way. I hope so anyway.
They will probably remember the love you have lavished on them. Isn't that the most important thing despite any other circumstances involved?
TW

chester

Jurs,
I have had the same feelings you have.
I agree with what Neyank said.

Plus the fact that we had no way of checking the WTS out.
Computers weren't available to everyone when I became involved with them. I don't think there was much written info. on the WTS either.
So I think it was much easier for the WTS to recrute new members from all walks of life up until a few years ago. Now we have the computer as well as books written by people that were involved with the WTS first hand.

Chester

those NOT raised in the truth

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