Canadian Temperature Guide 50° Fahrenheit (10° C) Californians shiver uncontrollably, Canadians plant gardens 35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C) Italian cars won't start, Canadians drive with the windows down. 32° Fahrenheit (0° C) American water freezes, Canadian water gets thicker. 0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C) New York City landlords finally turn on the heat, Canadians have the last barbecue of the season. -60° Fahrenheit (-51° C) Mt. St. Helens freezes, Canadians Girl Guides sell cookies door to door. -100° Fahrenheit (-73° C) Santa Claus abandons the North Pole, Ottawa canal opens for skating. -173° Fahrenheit (-114° C) Ethyl alcohol freezes, Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg. -460° Fahrenheit (-273° C) Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops, Canadians start saying "cold eh?" -500° Fahrenheit (-295° C) Hell freezes over, Leafs win Stanley Cup.