Going to court.... I need info/advice please...

by outbutnotdown 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    I haven't been real active here lately, but some might remember that I am going through a divorce with my ex, which, it seems will have to be terminated at a trial. She is technically still a JW.... (not df'd but she publically despises the religion).. and her mother is a regular pioneer. My ex is continuing to allow her mother to have a LOT of influence over my kids, including that I recently found out that my oldest (of four) son's exercise book (that goes to school showing what he has been reading at home) had almost all the entries being from their, "Greatest Man Who Ever Lived" book.

    Despite assurances from my ex that her mother's involvement will diminish and eventually be stopped, (especially as far as the JW teachings that supposedly even my ex despises), she has done NOTHING to show me that she is telling the truth in that regard.

    What I was hoping to get from everyone here is advice and especially straightforward examples of the negative impact that these teachings have on the children. I know I am going to get my hands on their school brochure, which is tame from their standards but will still point out their screwy ideas on not getting involved in extracurriculars with the rest of the world. Any other good pointers for me?

    Any help would be good. My family is still very much in the borg and I have NO help there.

    Thank you very much for your attention.

    Brad

  • Maya
    Maya

    Hi -

    Try going to this site ---- http://www.freeminds.org/legal/custody.htm

    This is regarding the booklet the Society's legal department put together to help Witness parents involved in custody disputes.

    It shows JW parents how to teach their children to LIE in court.

    It makes me sick.........

    Sincerely,

    Maya

  • anglise
    anglise

    I have PM'd you.

    Anglise

  • Navigator
    Navigator

    Better make sure that you have at least joint custody or you will have little to say about anything concerning your kids.

  • midwest
    midwest

    good-luck outbutnotdown.

    i dont kown if in canada your divorce laws but if possible you end up with joint legal & physical custody

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Thanks for replying, especially Maya, anglise and Gary, who pm'd me.

    Brad

  • alamb
    alamb

    pm me if you need more help...

  • Uzzah
    Uzzah

    I used to work in the Legal Department in Georgeotwon. Imay be of assistance to you. Please feel free to PM using this site or email at uzzah1998 at hotmail com Of course format the above email addy appropriately. I just typed it that way to avoid spiders

    (For example) The School brochure was re-written by legal to make it a more court friendly document. Make sure your lawyer introduces both versions of the same brochure into evidence. It clearly highlights where the society is trying to malke itself look better.

    I hope to hear from you

    Uzzah

  • AuSet
    AuSet

    Out but not down,

    sorry to hear that its going to go to trial, I'm going through a divorce too right now so I know pretty well how absolutely HELLISH they can be. Fortunately mine will probably not have to go to trial.

    My attorney has advised me on similar matters, so I may be of some help. Its very difficult to provide actual proof that this is going to harm your children, the court weighs religious and cultural beliefs of both sides, and tries to find some kind of agreement in the middle. You neglected to mention the reason why your children are being exposed to this now, and why they wouldn't be so much in the future. Is it because your ex is living with her parents? If so, maybe you'll just have to wait it out until she can move out, meanwhile attempt to actively minimize the influence your mother in law is having on the children. I have to do this every time my child comes back from spending some time at grandma's. We talk about how "silly" the meetings are, how its o.k. not to believe it or have your own, different beliefs. Its really not that hard to do this, because the JWs are not kid friendly at all, they don't really provide material most kids get excited about. My son is way more excited about sunday school classes than anything at the KH.

    Divorce courts are rarely the answer to solve kinds of problems like this, and this infuriates me to no end!! The only other option you may have is to have a guardian ad litem appointed who will look at both sides and make a recommendation to the court. But that can go both ways, good and bad. A psych eval of the kids may also be helpful, or not. It can go either way.

    Well, good luck, I hope everything works out for you. Feel free to PM me if you like...

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