((((((((((Sherry)))))))))) hugs to you hon.
Myson is 17, and every single time he goes out to visit friends I am giving " the speech". Sometimes it is hard to talk so frankly about sex with my almost grown son, but I do it anyway. His life and health , makes me overcome my natural shyness about sex,,,,at least talking to my kids about it....lol.
Around our little home town and I do mean little,,,,,,,the kids here drink. Telling my son , to not touch it is asking for him to lie about it. I am fortunate that he drinks only on occassion, as he could be doing worse , as many kids here do. I don't want him to drink at 17,,,,,,,,no way. But being real, being truthful with myself as a parent,,,,, I know he will when he wants to. I have talked about the dangers of drinking, the legal trouble he could get into, the trouble I could get into if he drinks, no drinking and driving, or riding with someone who has been drinking. I also tell him from the heart if he gets in a situation and he decides to drink , he can always call me to pick him up, no lectures , at least not at that point. I told him no matter what might do in life as far as mistakes,,,,,we can always work thru it.
I was never allowed that kind of openness and trust growing up.
I watch him closely and worry so much that he may turn to drinking one day to ease the depressions, or mood swings he gets into. It runs in the family , and so does chemical dependancy.
I was watching Oprah yesterday, and it was about women and drinking. The doctor that was on there is you can be an alcoholic and not really hit the rock bottom that some have.........YET. But sooner or later if you are an alcholic it will catch up with you. It is very scarey knowing the dangers our kids, even the grown ones, face .
I hope your son, will find a good support system. I was involved with AA , and alanon years ago when my mother was in rehab and I went with a close friend to AA not long ago. They usually don't encourage that , but because of my background and it being a really small hometown group, they let me stay.
AA is not for everyone. Some people are not ready to hear they can never have another drink in their lives. I don't know if there is a difference between "problem drinking" and being an alcholic. There is still so much I don't understand about it all.
But maybe, if you could , if you know at least one of his really good friends, a close cousin, someone who you both could do a little mini intervention type thing, that may help him to wake up before more trouble comes his way. I think it is better to try to hard than to just not do anything.
