Think about it...we are special

by findingme 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • findingme
    findingme

    When we were an active JW, we thought we were special, right? We felt we had the holy spirit, truth, and the priviledge of preaching. We drew a lot of attention from others because we were...different (special, unique, whatever). Now, look at us: we are here, sharing our experiences with each other: why we left, how we left, what we went through, what we are still going through. Nobody else can understand what we have gone through...only people who have "been there".

    How many other religious organizations have resulted in an "ex" site? We are here because we are "out" and we need each others' support and understanding. We need the reassurance that we are not "bad" like the JWs want us to believe. We are special, because we are where we are at now...It's like we have our own organization, without any rules. Oh my g.....

    Sorry....I've been doing some soul searching....scary

  • kat2u
    kat2u

    Personal growth is scary and beautiful and we are special to have the opportunity to do so.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic
    How many other religious organizations have resulted in an "ex" site?

    Do a google search and you will be surprised, I know I was/am!

    But yes we are unique to each other because of our experiences in the cult. We are no longer alone. We have the support of each other and we are free from condemnation.

    It's great to be free!

  • Paradise Found
    Paradise Found

    Nice Post...Yes we are special...Because we now realise we are know more special than anybody else.

    Its great no longer being so assured about ones self....so self rightiouse...In the organisation we were so sure of our rightioseness. That nobody would make us break one of those stupid Society rules...And most of those stupid Society rules I still dont want to break...I now only try to see the good in folks...Theres so much!!

  • Steve Lowry
    Steve Lowry

    "We need the reassurance that we are not "bad" like the JWs want us to believe."

    In time, you won't feel the need to be reassured that you're not ?bad?. In time, you will fully understand, on the emotional level as well as the intellectual, that no one is 'good' simply because they belong to a certain group. But this takes time. It took me a while but I know fully well that I am not ?bad? because I left the Watchtower Society. It was simply an evolutionary step in my personal development (not one I volunteered for however).

    Don?t make the mistake that I did (sounds like you aren?t). For years I just put the whole Watchtower experience out of my mind and psyche, only to realize that at like ten years out, I had unresolved issues. Acknowledge and even embrace the possibility that maybe you feel insecure about being a ?bad? person because you?re no longer a Jehovah?s Witness. Then start weighing that feeling with reality, and in time you?ll know on every level that being ?good? isn?t contingent on belonging to a group. Life will teach you this lesson. Trust me on this one.

    Let me tell you something. YOU make your way in this world. YOU pay your bills. YOU get up and go to work everyday. YOU pay your taxes. YOU raise your children. YOU provide the three basic needs for you and your family (food, shelter, and clothing). The Watchtower never put a CRUMB of food on your table. You think about THAT the next time you feel ?bad? because you?re no longer one of it?s followers. You don?t need the Watchtower. It needs you! It places subliminal messages in its literature that makes it followers believe they are bad people if they ever leave. It?s just a simple mind control technique, and it works pretty well.

    Now, do I think JW?s are ?bad? for being in the Watchtower Society? Nah, but I DO think they?re pretty stupid.

    Steve

  • findingme
    findingme

    Steve:

    Thank you for your comments. The more I read words like the ones you have written, the better I feel. You are so right about the "unresolved issues" after so many years. I was to the point where I wouldn't pursue any goals, thinking to myself "what's the point? I'm going to die for being disfellowshipped anyway. I'm an awful person for not wanting to return to being a JW. I don't deserve to be happy". What a wrong attitude that was.

    Time is a good healer, but relating to other people has helped me more. My immediate family left JW the same time I was disfellowshipped. We find ourselves talking about it a great deal; it's obvious we still have those "unresolved issues". However, I have talked with a more positve note since I found this site; I want it to help my family like it helps me. I want them to get past those guilty feelings and go on with their lives. Everyone, no matter where they've been or what they've done, deserve to do that.

    I found this site by accident just a couple of weeks ago. It has helped me already. I hope I can help others, too.

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