The Organization is Just Like a Controlling, Abusive Lover

by new light 9 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • new light
    new light

    The mentality of many who defend the org. and/or continue membership despite knowing the evidence against them is similar to that of a person who defends an abusive/controlling lover.

    "Sure, he controls every aspect of my life, doesn't let me spend time with anyone else, and beats me when I do, but that's beacause he loves me."

    Many times, it is the path of least resistance to be a JW, despite what the literature may tell you. It is much easier to reconcile the beliefs you were raised on than to walk your own path.

    Sometimes, its just easier to stay with the abusive mate you are used to than to leave and start over. Just a thought.

  • blondie
    blondie

    It is abuse and this book details how it is accomplished not just by the WTS but other groups.

    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1556611609/002-6674924-7791223?v=glance

  • shera
    shera

    Makes sense to me.

  • kibizzle
    kibizzle

    Just makes me feel sorry for my family that still buys into the BS. What a sick sick organization it is!

  • abbagail
    abbagail

    Good analogy, new light...

    I began having the same thought last year while untangling from such a lover... ie, that I had gone straight from a high-control, lying, manipulative, sneaky religion to the same in the 'disguise of a man,' lol... nothing like being 'duped' for half my entire life by one or the other...







    • Love-bombs you in the beginning, promises 'paradise'
    • Lots of 'charm' and comes in a 'pretty' package
    • Appears 'beautiful' in every way, shape, form > on the Outside (Dead Men's Bones don't surface right away)
    • Lies
    • Won't Face you with their lies
    • Hides after getting caught lying, doesn't explain
    • Denies ever doing anything wrong
    • Speaks in convoluted, forked, and ambiguous tongue
    • Likes to show up without advance notice - lol
    • Says he/they are not like other men/religions
    • Retains an 'air' of 'mystery'
    • Keeps you guessing of what's coming next in your future
    • Not allowed to ask questions, must 'trust' w/o question
    • If you write out your thoughts and mail it, you won't get a reply
    • Makes you feel guilty about everything
    • Puts you on 'reproof' for days or weeks at a time if you put up a fuss, giving themselves an excuse to ignore you
    • Reminds you that you are/were NOT the 'center of the universe,' but he/they ARE, lol.
    • Always dangles a carrot that you can never quite reach
    • Putting up w/either of them (man/religion) EXHAUSTS you
    • Expects you to 'hate' everyone they/he 'hates' or sees as 'enemies'
    • Expects complete loyalty even though he/they are not loyal to you
    • WT has 'theocratic warfare.' Man had 'code of the streets' (more like a BS-code, from his long-past youth in NYC)
    • Has a constant need for 'narcissistic supply' so continuously seeks 'new converts'


    Re: lying, specifically: Here are two of my favorite Dr. Phil descriptions...

    Secretive, Evasive, Clandestine...--and--

    Dodging, Ducking, Weaving, Lying...

    LOL. That sounds like the WT, too!

    /ag
  • new light
    new light

    Awesome reply, Abbagail! Thanks for adding so much detail. Obviously you have given it much more thought than me. You're something of an expert . Thanks again.

  • willyloman
    willyloman

    abbagail: you left out the BIG one...

    Won't let you make [worldy] friends or spend time with your [worldly] relatives.

  • ohiocowboy
    ohiocowboy

    Yes, the organization is like a controlling abusive lover, except with a lover you occasionally have a chance to get off!!!

  • peacefulpete
    peacefulpete

    I have the book posted above. The analogies are helpful but unfortuantely the attempts to use the Bible to refute cult thinking requires all too familiar selective proof texting. The American Family Foundation (website) uses a much more sober and scientific approach to identifying unhealthy thinking and how to break the pattern. However if anyone wants this book let me know I send it anywhere in the U.S. for 3 bucks.

  • JT
    JT

    REPOST

    THIS INFO SHEDS SOME INTERESTING LIGHT ON THE ISSUE AS WELL

    #####

    For those of you interested in why your rational arguments and reasoning, in addition to well documented information do little to sway the beliefs of true believers (family, friends, and loved ones), the reason as offered in the following article is survival.

    http://www.csicop.org/si/2000-11/beliefs.html

    Offered humbly for your perusal,

    CPiolo

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit