How real was this?

by paradix 3 Replies latest jw experiences

  • paradix
    paradix

    When I remember my time in the BOrg, I wonder
    how many things I have seen which I thought were evidences of
    spirituality were just acting and disguise.
    No, I am not saying that everybody were acting, but what about the
    contrast between the behaviour of the people inside the hall and
    out?What about the record of many persons who maked good talkings
    and comments in the meetings and haven't real love to others.
    What about the way to see others, specially people out the "truth"?
    Have you see real mercy? Did we really loved people when we were
    preaching house to house?Why we preached? Because we loved Jehovah
    or to have some hours to inform?
    I am not discovering anything. What I am trying to say is that this
    behaviour is well known by the GB, the overseers, the elders (As a matter of fact ,I used to be one, and many times put this matter to
    consideration in the elders's meetings. The answer was, almost always, What do you pretend the brothers do?) And still they say
    they are preaching the truth and doing that because they love people
    and God...
    It's a charade of the true christianism...

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    Paradix,

    Welcome to the Board!

    I think there are many of us here who feel the way that you do. That the "love" that was claimed to exist among the "friends" and towards our neighbors was not really love at all. It was, rather, a way to feel superior to our neighbors: "Look how much I love you! (I even come to your doorstep to prove it.) and a way to feel righteous among our brothers and sisters (and I even have my time sheet to prove it.)

    I think you will enjoy reading another thread on the Main forum. It's entitled "Sin, Mercy and the Watchtower." It applies to your post as well.

    It is nice to have another former elder on the board. I am sure you can give us very good insight into how things work in your country.
    (I noticed from another post that English is not your first language.)

    Are you still one of Jehovah's Witnesses although no longer an elder?
    If you have not left, why not? If you have left, under what circumstances and how long ago?

    I am not trying to pry into your personal life if you are unable to share details at the moment. But it is nice to have a feeling for someone.

    My personal experience can be found in the Dating, Sex, etc. Forum where there is a Hello, Hello thread. There is a more recent one in the Personal Experiences Forum, too.

    Nice to 'meet' you!

    outnfree

  • paradix
    paradix

    Hy Outnfree:
    It's nice to meet too.
    Well, I am able to explain how I left the JWOrganization.It was just
    a matter of keeping eyes wide open.I used to see many things that just
    don't work biblical way. I saw circuit and district overseer favouring
    brothers because they preferre their homes to stay during the visit
    (wealthy brothers, I means) rather than poor brothers that barely had
    a roof over their heads.
    I saw people that had spiritual hunger along with doubts kicked off
    the organization because they were "bad influence" to others.
    I saw many "active" brothers who showed they loved nobody, perhaps
    themself.This persons used to be "pillars" on the congregation.
    I saw the elders considered unworthly the few preachinghours many brothers and sisters informed, seting side to side pioneers and
    "common" sisters and brothers, punishing them and steeling his dignity.
    BUt, that's not all. Someday, I read in the internet a excerpt of
    the BOok "Crisis of Conscience" by Ray Franz. ¡It was .... a hit on
    my head! Do you think I liked what I read? You are wrong if you think
    that. I feel hurted,raped...Who is this man to say these things?
    BUt...he was right. I found he said nothing without biblical basis.
    Beyond this, I start to see why I felt so bad last years in the "truth". He showed me the reason. And the reason was that the
    BOrg has many things, but God's Spirit.
    I realize this organization was (is) just an experiment, a moral experiment to check how deep could a bunch of men handle the conscience of others. I thought (and I think now the same way)
    the Borg had its precedent in the Pharisees,who enjoy to present
    themself as Moral Champions. And we all know what Jesus said about
    them.
    I start to share my feelings(and the knowledge that Internet provided
    me ) with other people who were hurted in many ways.Everybody said me
    that they were finally seeing light at the end of the tunnel.
    I left the meetings, (my wife too) and later the elders call me for
    a meeting. They asked me:We hear you are saying the Truth is not the
    Truth. I answered: The truth is the BIble. That's what we teach,isn't
    it?
    They asked:Do you think the Society is the solely channel of GOd will
    in the Earth?
    I answered: You are tryng to kicked me off. I know that. I won't
    answered your questions, I am going to become inactive, leave me alone.
    And they said:Will you keep saying others the things you had see in
    the Internet? My answer: I will.
    And then, the three elders start to have a kind of discussion before
    me about what to do with me. FInally, they decided to ask me not talk
    with brothers about theses things and to send a letter to the Society
    to remove me as an elder. BUt I am still a brother.Do you know why?
    Are you wondering why they didn't disfellowshipped me?
    The reason is: a man who used to be and still is a ministerial servant
    asked me a loan of 10.000 dollars(all life savings). And I lend him
    this amount of money. He used the money to move to USA, and left me
    and my wife with no money and many debts.This man is a killer, he
    almost kill me and my wife. And, do you know what?, he is still a
    very active publisher in the State, and a ministerial servant too.
    (Give me a break!)
    This whole thing was well known in the congregation at this time.
    Because this, I think, they decided wasn't not the "right" time to
    disfellowship me. But I know it's just a matter of time.
    Anyway, the most important thing is to keep our hope.
    I think God is real, the BIble is true.I think someday the Witnesses
    will be just a caption in the dictionaries. They are becoming more
    and more selflovers, they like to receive glory and praises one each
    other. They are moderns pharisees.
    And God is looking.
    I pray God bless you, Outnfree, and everybody in the board or out who
    are seeking GOd.
    I believe, because our Lord Jesus Christ said so, we are knowed by the
    Jehovah the Father.
    Yours sincerely,
    Paradix

  • paradix
    paradix

    Hy Outnfree:
    I have read the page"Sin, Mercy and The Watchtower ". You are right,
    it's the same kind of thing I posted here!
    Thank you for let me know that.
    By the way: I didn't left the BOrg because someone taked my savings.
    (Just to make clear the things.)
    See you later in the board I hope.
    Paradix

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