Wonderful. How many have felt this way?

gladtobefree

I am talking about the song Wonderful by Everclear. That song hits me so deep everytime I hear it I cry.

I was reading the thread on bully's and it just brings back so many bad memeories from growing up as a very poor, red head and freckles, short, JW kid with 9 siblings in a house with a non-practicing catholic father and a Jehovah's Witness mother. I did not have friends in school but my mom told me that we had to show people that we were Jehovah's happy people. She would say that it did not matter that I did not have friends in school anyway because Armagedon was coming real soon. So I went to school and when kids asked why I did not celebrate the holidays or salute the flag I would say as proudly as I could that Jehovah did not want me to. I would act as if I was fine with it. I had learned that all to familliar line about how we don't need X-mas & b-days because are parents could give us gifts all year round just because they loved us. Well, that never happened. The only "gifts" I ever got was new underwear occasionally. I wore my big brothers hand me downs and hand me downs from people at the hall that felt sorry for us. I never even got new socks.

Then there was mom and dad. They fought so much. My dad was very verbally abusive and my mother was always trying to defend the WTS and her beliefs. My dad was a vietnam vet and was an alcholic. My mom would never let him talk about the war so he held it in and is now suffering from PTSD. They finally divorced after 29 years of mariage. I was already grown by then. My mom's life has been full of suffering. My childhood was full of suffering, but somehow we were supposed to pretend like everything was wonderful. Wasn't it wonderful how Jehovah always provided. Like the time that the man came to turn off our electric and my mom begged him to give her one more day, then all us kids went up and down the street and all over the house looking for loose change to pay the bill. Jehovah was so wonderful to help us find the full amount needed. Of course he could have provided through the congergation, but then that would have taken away from the money spent to jet-set the governing body around the world to give those oh so needed talks! And of course mom could not go to work cause she just kept having more kids and she decided when I was in 6th grade that she needed to home school us to keep us away from worldly influences. (like we had friends!) It was nice to escape all the torture at school but we got it from neigborhood kids anyway. My childhood sucked! But hey, there was always the promise of the paridise to come.....

Some of the lyrics that strike a cord are :

"I close my eyes when I get too sad
I think thoughts that I know are bad
Close my eyes and I count to ten
Hope it's over when I open themHope my mom and I hope my dad
Will figure out why they get so mad
Hear them scream, I hear them fight
They say bad words that make me wanna cry
Close my eyes when I go to bed
And I dream of angels who make me smile
I feel better when I hear them say
Everything will be wonderful someday
Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world's so big
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Tell me everything is wonderful now

Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now

I go to school and I run and play
I tell the kids that it's all okay
I like to laugh so my friends won't know
When the bell rings I just don't wanna go home
Go to my room and I close my eyes
I make believe that I have a new life
I don't believe you when you say
Everything will be wonderful someday
Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world is so big
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
When you tell me everything is wonderful now"

frenchbabyface

lyrics that strike a cord

Right !

Ciara

The first time I heard that song I got completely choked up. Also "Family Portrait" by Pink. My daughter bought the CD and when I heard that song, it really hit me hard.

Ciara

frankiespeakin

Glad,

Yeah the song brings back memories. Sorry for the crap you had to take when you were a kid. Let's hope the remainder of your life has better times.

Obviously Secret

That promised paradise is such great huh? People put THEMSELVES through pain (My parents put me through my pain for sure) giving them more strength on saying how bad the world is. YOUR world is bad, not the world.

My mom is always talking about "Oh these days are getting worse and worse." I'm like what the hell man. There has been wars suffering disease since the dawn of time how in the hell can you say it's worse. I actually say it's better than other times on earth, sometimes worse. That's the way of the world.

God!!! I'm about to try to talk to my brother because he is a very sensible person but it's so hard sometimes. Why did the WTS have to be so crafty? It's almost demonized (Even though I don't believe in demons anymore.), it's terrible.

I use to be SOOO!!! freaking paranoid about freaking everything. I use to think demons were all around me, I could actually see demons all around me. And I cry everyday thinking that the demons are taking over me and the fact that I'm so paranoid and crying and that demons are all around me makes me cry more. No amount of praying has every solved that. My parents and nobody else can seem to realise that. It's freaking retarded GOD!!!

Guys if you can give me some tips on how I can convince my brother that the WTS is crap.

If there is a God, he wouldn't have created something so devious that people used that ruined millions maybe billions of people's lives. And if Heaven is real HE doomed a lot of humans from never even getting a chance to go to heaven. God is such crap.

Insomniac

I agree with you- every time I hear that song, I almost bust out crying for all the pain in my past. The important thing, however, is that I dry my tears and try to make some new, happy memories. We can't get back the years that we lost, but we have a level of control over our futures. I still can't believe how much better life is now, than when I was a kid.

Obviously Secret

Ya know, I wonder what are my JW friends and family's happiest moment in life? If they say an assembly even God would snicker at that. Seriously, if that's God's mouthpeice he would give some better stuff than the SAME THING EVERY FREAKIN YEAR!!!!!!!!!!

Undaunted Danny

I suffered BRUTAL persecution as a JW kid.I was in 2nd grade when president John Kennedy was killed.The entire school HATED me.It was all for NOTHING! High Five gladtobefree>That song hits me so deep everytime I hear it I cry. We hold our heads high http://dannyhaszard.com/media/holdhead.mp3 Click Me. our JWD power song http://dannyhaszard.com/media/last.mp3 'If this was the last of all days what would you really do?..

TallTexan

Secret,

Don't come out and say 'the WT is crap' cuz that will put him on the defensive. Start asking questions. Steven Hassan's book is excellent in this regard, because he shows how, over time, you can sow enough doubt with relatively simple questions that they will start to see the illogical views of the 'cult' on their own. It will take time, unless they have already expressed doubts. He may never agree w/ you, but try to take it slow at first. If you overwhelm him with information he'll likely get lost and not even think about it. Start small and work your way up. Let the doubts build in his mind and then work on those. Good luck.

kls

I know what you mean, my parent's were not in the cult but the fighting was daily. As a child i would close my eyes and hide in a closet and pretend i was not there or i would watch tv and see a beautiful sceen and pray i could climb into the tv and just live in the trainquil settings. Many songs bring back my feelings as a child and i would rather not think about it.

Wonderful. How many have felt this way?

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