Friends, my heart is a little heavy at the moment. Someone I met on Witnet last year is having struggles. I will not reveal his real name or location, but suffice it to say he is going through the worst of it now and needs your prayers or Buddhist chants or whatever.
A little background, he first wrote me the below post, which I saved because I thought he had balls to write and question me, and I was a little paranoid, wondering if he was Witnet thought police.
But, I sensed something different about him, that he really needed to ask questions. At the time many people on Witnet were thinking I was just a radical rebellious sister. Here is his first post to me.
Hello Lisa,First, this mail is unsolicited, but I wish to assume that since your
address is made public, you may not balk at receiving a mail like this.
I've been reading your posts and I wonder. Are you a practicing JW? How do
you cope in your congregation? Your views, IMO, are pretty leftist for a
practicing JW. It's only a question of curiousity. And do friends in your
congregation know you make these posts? How do they receive these? Being
easily misunderstood when asking seemingly legitimate questions is something
that haunts me. Witnet, I believe, will be a legitimate outlet to ventilate
such hidden doubts; I am concerned about the reception offered the seemingly
"rebellious" ("different" is probably a better word) one amongst us.Kindly reply.
My first response.
I am a leftist kind of girl. I don't care whether anyone 'knows'
about my posts, which is why I post under my own name and publish my e-mail
account, which is pretty easy to figure out.I submit to Jehovah alone. Matters that are termed 'conscience'
matters are just that. I live in a country that grants me the freedom to
speak my mind, no 'elder' checks my hand.I haven't had what I would consider a 'suspicous reception.' When
Obed or any one else has had enough of my rantings, they will let me know.I have no issues with theocratic order. However, when that order
overtakes peoples brains, it leaves them just a little short of brainwashed.And you? Are you brave enough to tell me your user name on WitNet?
His response:
Lisa,
I indeed appreciate your frankness. As one with a strong Christendom
background and brought up by strict parents (my dad is a pastor while my
mother participates actively in the church) I had to advance what was then
termed "leftist thinking" to support my decision to become a JW some three
years ago; and that was while at the university, where I met people with
different faiths (I used to have friends who were mystics and one who was an
atheist). The decision to become a JW was made after rigorous fact-finding
and research (I use 'research' since I was truly unsure of what the outcome
of my fact-finding mission might be). But now I wonder. There seem to be a
leaning among the friends to be pressured to abandon this kind of approach
in examining and legitimately asking questions and exploring the meaning of
the things we are learning. I live in ********, and the name you
see on my email address are my real names. When I informed a brother about
visiting this site (which I consider very, very educative) he instantly
discouraged me, even without examining the contents of the site; and this is
an enlightened brother; he studied with me and remains a trusted friend (in
fact, I intend to intimate him of this exchange). The point I'm trying to
make is that I think we have less than free and open discussions about our
faith (WITNET addresses this to a greater-than-average-extent) and we never
know where that may lead. Before I found WITNET some weeks ago, I was
somewhere near breaking point, having no avenue to discuss disturbing
questions and generally feeling the inquisitive me was dying. It is both a
relief and encouragement to find people like you (and *** and
*** others) who ask questions and explore possibilities while holding on to
their resolve to serve and maintain their allegiance to Jehovah.**Against the generally feeling in my immediate environment, I have sent in
my registration request to the WITNET administrators, I hope they reply
soon.Thank you for taking the time to read this long one.
Your brother,
Needless to say, I now consider him one of my true friends although we've never even met. The above letters were written almost a year ago, and we have continued to write on a daily basis.
His JW girlfriend, the daughter of an elder, only discovered yesterday his doubts, and although she said she thought there was 'something up' did not directly question him.
Now he is waiting for a meeting with the elders, since as a good little JW girl she is obligated to tattle tale.
Many tears have been shed, and I think his battle is just beginning. All because a young man a continent away had a burning desire to serve God and not man. Can you stand it?
He does post here infrequently, and it is very hard for me to watch him going through this.
Thanks for listening to my rantings.
Lisa