Midnight Express
Does somebody remember this movie from 1979?
Well I do very well. It was about an american tourist who ended up in a Turkish jail. The condition in this prison was like a living hell. He was captured for 6 years before he got an opportunity to escape back home. The most prominent impression I got during the film, was a sneaking suffercated feeling, like I was captured myself. When the movie ended, I felt I was released myself, and could enjoy my freedom again. So did I believe??
About a week or two later, this sneaking feeling turned up again. And guess where??,,,,Right
The Kingdom hall.
So for 10 years I wanted out.. But I didnt know how to escape, or where . I was captured with a bad conscience, fear, and a with deep respect for the Governing Body . In other words, totally brain washed, a walking vegetable.
But the suffercated feeling was always present, even in the field service, where I tried to perform as a happy theocratic representative of the kingdom of God.
In 1989 I got the currage to read some apostate litterature. R.Franz & C.O.Jonson. And with great help from Norm I managed to leave at once. (Thanks Norm) This was the final end of my carrer as a JW.
I was 36 at that time,, 36 years of captivity
I was free at last,. free to think for myself, to wonder about everything. And the most important for me, to replace my belief system.
I have never since felt I needed another Borg or a prison as a substitute . But It make me sad to see ex JW running from the Borg over the street and into another prison. But maybe the expiating condition is better in the new captivity?
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
Woody Allen