I was awestruck with the way brainwashing and indoctrination can cloud our intellect and preprogram our minds to mechanically respond with the party line without really thinking about subjects. Not that I did not know but it remains astounding nevertheless. This seems to be a little long but bear thru it and please share your thoughts:
In my house we like reading, especially fiction. I like lawyer thrillers, she likes supernatural thrillers (The Watchtower)
As we lay in bed reading our little getaways from reality, suddenly and out of the blue I got an invitation to attend this week?s public meeting.
As I placed down my book I decided to go along for a while:
"What for?"
"You know?"
"To study?"
"?"
"?and associate?"
"?"
"Why don?t we study here?" (Being a drifter I know this is a big No-No)
"I can?t study with you. You know that"
"Did the org stop the ?must have a family study? thingy recently?"
"You know I can?t?" (ok, let?s see why?) We don?t believe the same things"
"Actually we do? How much is 1+1?"
"Don?t play silly?"
"See, we do believe in basically the same things Why then-"
"-Some things, we do not believe the same about everything, that?s why"
"Well, no two individuals believe the same about everything. Then you shouldn?t study with anyone, right?"
"I do not want to argue"
"Argue? I am not arguing? I am asking you calmly why don?t we study together the WT today? Maybe you can expand your views a little"
"Well I don?t want to argue and if I answer you correctly why I won?t study with you we will get into a argument" (Never seen a JW pass on informal preaching before this)
"Why don?t you read the paragraphs out loud for me and we?ll discuss what we think?"
"NO? If you want you can keep this one and study yourself"
"But why can?t you read the paragraphs to me? You certainly encourage people to do so, Why not take the time with me? You must take care first of your family. I do qualify for family right?"
"Yes, the closest thing, BUT you are not taking the lead" (I am but she doesn?t quite get it)
"What am I doing then? If not, show me the way"
"What are you pursuing with this?"
"I want to do what is right and get to the bottom of things, maybe you see things differently because you process data differently. I want to see how you digest the info so I can do the same? and maybe I can get back in track"
Well that was that and off she went to the couch to finish the study?As I walked by I asked:
"So I am encouraged to go and spend time learning with 100+ ?strangers? but I can?t spend a second with you? How?s that for taking care of your family first?"
Off course at the hall I will be silent and won?t have interactive participation to try to clarify my concerns (since everything is pre-programmed with micromanagement precision) but in my inner sanctum 'Big Brother' won?t have a say? and too easily I can drift into actually thinking.
How am I supposed to re-learn the way in? Am I expected to just clear out any doubts by myself and then spend time reasserting what I now convinced myself to think? How would I properly find my way back in if they deny guidance (besides dogmatically stating what to do and to think) when I am most in need? If Satan is such a formidable foe, Why should I be left alone to face him? What ever happened to the 99 vs 1 lost sheep parable?
We all here know the answer to those questions but I completely miss the point of just avoiding similar conundrums for the sake of ?unity??
It seems that we only like to answer the questions we are prepared to deal with.
How did we miss the hints all those years?
Is intellectual honesty such a threat to God? If so, why did he endow us with such undesirable quality or is reason just a corruption of the intended function? Are we to forgo reason?s use and always go along with what our mentors recommend? Should we just overlook conflicting facts pretending there is a better explanation somewhere? Is history benevolent with those assuming this stance? If we are to assume that position, why did Jehovah let so many of his faithful drift away from his organization to eventualy have to reclaim it as his in the 19 th century? Was not God supposed to steer them into correctness long before that? Are manipulation and intimidation the Almighty?s chosen tools? Who seems to benefit more from the segregation techniques, God or his representatives?
It appears that having a little dissention from some human understanding of the Almighty?s will is tantamount to sacrificing lambs to Satan himself. Even though time and time again that understanding turns out to be inaccurate. Does that sound like the loving God we preach about?
How much do I have to dissent to be counted with the undeserving? Is it enough to think that attending is not necessary? Or is it the attitude involved the discriminating fact? Ohhhh so Jehovah only knows? Why don?t we let him judge then? Does he need our help for that?
Caveat, always caveat.