help me to talk to my wife

by toolmaker 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • toolmaker
    toolmaker

    I have attached a letter that I am thinking of giving to my wife who is a witness, she wasn't going to the meetings for 8 months and showed interest in exploring other avenues of spirituallity (Christian). Without getting into too much detail she was disfellowshiped for seeing me. She was told by the elders that she had no grounds for devorce at the time and that she had to go back to her abusive husband. I am feeling very alone and am searching, desperatly for a way to tell her that her going to the meetings is driving a wedge between us. I realize that her family is involved and not going back to the organization means possibly never talking to them again. Any assistance in this will be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks

    I asked you before if you could explain why the witness organization doesn?t celebrate birthdays. You explained that there were two examples of birthdays in the Bible and they both had negative endings so that is why. Using that same logic I want to ask another question, why do witnesses practice disfellowshiping? I already know what they tell you but I would like to tell you that I only see one example of a person being told to leave a place of worship and there family told never speak and to disown them. Yes there are rules set out in the new testament that describe why one would choose to not associate with someone else but only the one scripture where it is actually felt as necessary to actually do it. The ones doing the shunning in the scripture that I read are the sagacies and pharmacies. If we are to use the same logic as the birthday scenario then there must be other examples of someone being disfellowshiped because obviously the example doesn?t fit with the living according to biblical standards if we can?t celebrate birthday?s because there are negative examples of birthdays given in the Bible then aren?t we bound by the same rules when we look at disfellowshiping.

  • chappy
    chappy

    For some reason my intuition tells me that if she stays with you that these visits to the KH will not last.

    Good Luck!!

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I am a little confused on the chronology of events:

    • She left an abusive relationship and started seeing you.
    • The elders caught on and told her to go back to her abusive husband.
    • This she refused to do, and was disfellowshipped.
    • During the eight months out of the society's grip, she married you.
    • She also showed signs of checking out other churches.
    • Now she is talking about getting reinstated for the sake of her family?

    Is that about it? Does that mean you have a very young marriage? If I were you, I would have lots of heart to heart talks with your wife. She knew deep down that you were right for her, and that old life was killing her. Instead of battling her on the JW stuff (which throws in to her old way of thinking), remind her of the kind of life she enjoys with you. I think it is right to point out that the JW stuff will be a wedge in your relationship. Good luck.

    A short note on your spelling,

    The ones doing the shunning in the scripture that I read are the sagacies and pharmacies.

    Correction:

    The ones doing the shunning in the scripture that I read are the saducees and pharisees.

    That was kind of a cute slip up there!

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    I agree with Jgnat ... wishe you good luck !!!

  • vitty
    vitty

    Hi and welcome

    Tell her Job`s family celebrated their birthdays. Show her this site, it might make her think twice

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