Gay Penguins

by ValiantBoy 9 Replies latest jw friends

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  ValiantBoy

  German zoo tempts gay penguins to go straight

  A German zoo has imported four female penguins from Sweden in an effort to tempt its gay penguins to go straight.
  
  The four Swedish females were dispatched to the Bremerhaven Zoo in Bremen after it was found that three of the zoo?s five penguin pairs were homosexual. Keepers at the zoo ordered DNA tests to be carried out on the penguins after they had been mating for years without producing any chicks. It was only then they realised that six of the birds were living in homosexual partnerships. Director Heike Kueck said that the zoo hoped to see some baby penguins in the coming months.
  
  She said that the birds had been mating for years and one couple even adopted a stone that they protected like an egg. Kueck said that the project has the support of the European Endangered Species Programme because the penguins, which are native to South America, are an endangered species.
  
  A biologist will be on hand to monitor the experiment. But introducing the Bremerhaven penguins to their new Swedish friends may not be as successful as hoped after earlier experiments revealed great difficulties in separating homosexual couples.
  
  In case they show no interest, the zoo has also flown in two new male penguins ?so that the ladies don?t miss out altogether?, Kueck added. ananova

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  jwbot

  Hehe awww....why can't they just accept the penguins? :)
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  Badger

  See what happens when men start dressing up in tuxes?
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  AlmostAtheist

  "In related news, an errant U.S. missile -- intended for Iraqi insurgent positions in Fallujah -- has struck the German Zoo, destroying the penguin habitat and damaging several surrounding exhibits. 'We weep with the people of Germany,' said President Bush, 'And we deeply regret the completely inadvertant destruction of the heathen, disgusting, warped penguins. Though an abomination before God, we know they were in some small way, still God's creatures.' A full investigation into the accident will be carried out by the Pentagon, overseen by the President personally."

  Dave
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  Insomniac

  I used to have a wonderful cat who was gay. He only ever went for male cats, and he utterly ignored females, even those who were in heat and kept putting their bidness right up in his face- no reaction whatsoever. So, it does happen with animals, just as with humans.

  I don't think those penguins will ever be turned straight. Speaking from personal experience, if a guy is gay, he's gay, and no level of feminine pulchritude will induce him to change.
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  ezekiel3

  I see it as definite proof of the impact of man's imperfection on the animal kingdom over the last 6,000 years.

  See what happens when men start dressing up in tuxes?
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  ohiocowboy

  I always suspected that Chilly Willy the penguin was Gay, my Gaydar never fails me....
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  BrendaCloutier

  See what happens when men start dressing up in tuxes? Actually, no wonder they're confused, the women are cross-dressing in tuxes! Ha! In Sealions, those who are horny and don't mate with a matable female will rape young females and males. I understandy homosexuality in goats is about the same as in humans... about 10% So, godess don't make no crap.
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  ValiantBoy

  I love the fact that they adopted a stone. That is sooo cute.
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  czarofmischief

  So two leprechauns knock on the door of the convent in County Kerry and ask to speak to the Mother Superior.

  They ask her, "Is there a leprechaun nun in this convent?"

  The Mother Superior says, "No, my children, there is no leprechaun nun in this convent."

  One of the leprechauns looks triumphant, the other hastily adds, "Is there, perchance, Mother Superior, a leprechaun nun somewhere in this fair County Kerry?"

  The Mother Superior says, "No, son, there be no leprechaun nuns in fair County Kerry."

  The first leprechaun starts to giggle madly, stamping his feet. The second leprechaun, with a look of panic on his face says, "Oh, Mother Superior, tell me true, is there a leprechaun nun anywhere in Erin?"

  The Mother Superior shakes her head and says, "Nay, son, there are no leprechaun nuns anywhere in Ireland!"

  The first leprechaun slaps the second on the back and shouts, "See, lad, I told ye you were fookin a penguin!"

  CZAR