How do I?

th1197

I was baptized 5 years ago and inactive for the past 4... I've been married for almost 5 years to a caring man that was raised as a JW. He's been inactive most his life :) He hates all other forms of religion and tends to be anti-social because everyone is "worldly". I don't want my child to grow up as a JW. Anyone have some advice as to how I can do this without threatening my marriage?

larc

It seems to me that if you are out and he is inactive, that you don't have a problem.

It seems to me that if your husband is inactive and he doesn't like wordly people, it may be that he is just very introverted and really doesn't many people in his life. Just a guess.

That's all I can think of.

th1197

larc,
thanks for the reply.

i miss celebrating holidays and i want my little boy to enjoy traditions. i have such fond memories of xmas time and birthdays. my husband hasn't been to a mtg in over a year, yet he holds true to the JW beliefs. i'm so confused...what is the TRUTH????

larc

He would probably have a fit it you celebrated in your home. Do you have relatives you can visit at holidays? This might solve the problem.

th1197

he would probably have a fit or worse... i guess the best answer is to continue to live a secret life :)

larc

What do you mean "or worse"? What other problems are you implying? If he only has a fit - so what. All men and some women have fits. That's our nature.

pamkw

Even when people don't go to meetings, they act and think just like they did when they went. If you really want to keep your son from being raised a jw, it will affect your marriage. There is no way to have both. You will have to decide which is more important to you, your son or your marriage. Personally, I have always chosen my children over any relationship. I guess that is why I am not married now. You are in a hard place, and I am sure your husband will not make it any easier for you. Is there any way you can talk this over with him? Sorry I can' t be more positive about this.

Pam

reagan_oconnor

Here's a question for you:

When someone asks you what religion you are, how do you respond?

How does your husband respond?

For 2 years after I drifted away, when someone asked me, my response was "I'm one of Jehovah's Witnesses." Even though I hadn't attended, hadn't even gotten a Watchtower or cracked open the New World Translation, and really didn't believe the stuff they taught, I still called myself a JW.

When I started doing research about the Society, and it became apparent to me what the WTBS was *really* about, I responded differently when people asked.

Now I say, "I'm a Christian." If pressed, I explain that I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness, but I'm a Christian now.

I found that this helped in my "deprogramming" and enabled me to open up to celebrating holidays and the like. Check out Randy Watters' Web site at http://www.freeminds.org and maybe you might find some helpful information there.

It's already the end of July; start working on your husband now, and you just might get to celebrate Christmas as a family this year!

Cheers,
Reagan

I am the master of my fate/I am the captain of my soul.

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