Madeira m'dear? You have nothing to fear...

by Englishman 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    Hee hee. Well, were off on Monday to the Pearl of the Atlantic. To the lush Island of Madeira where they make their own special wine called, oddly enough..Madeira wine!

    This is where we're going:

    ..and as for the "Madeira m'dear" quip, well, many years ago, Brit act Flanders & Swann penned a merry little ditty about an old roue who liked to get his girlfriends drunk on Madeira wine. Here it is:

    HAVE SOME MADEIRA M'DEARby
    Flanders and Swann

    She was young, she was pure, she was new, she was nice,
    She was fair, she was sweet seventeen.
    He was old, he was vile, and no stranger to vice,
    He was base, he was bad, he was mean.
    He had slyly inveigled her up to his flat
    To view his collection of stamps
    And he said as he hastened to put out the cat,
    the wine, his cigar and the lamps:
    'Have some madeira, M'dear
    You really have nothing to fear
    I'm not trying to tempt you, that wouldn't be right
    You shouldn't drink spirits at this time of night
    Have some madeira, M'dear
    It's very much nicer than beer
    I don't care for sherry, one cannot drink stout
    and port is a wine I can well do without
    It's simply a case of Chacun à son gout
    Have some madeira, M'dear!'

    Unaware of the wiles of the snake in the grass
    The fate of the maiden who topes
    She lowered her standards by raising her glass
    Her courage, her eyes and his hopes
    She sipped it, she drank it, she drained it, she did
    He quietly refilled it again
    And he said, as he secretly carved one more notch
    on the butt of his gold-handled cane;

    'Have some Madeira, M'dear
    I've got a small cask of it here.
    And once it's been opened, you know it won't keep
    Do finish it off, it'll help you to sleep
    Have some Madeira, M'dear
    It's really an excellent year
    Now if it were Gin you'd be wrong to say yes
    The evil gin does would be hard to assess
    Besides, it's inclined to affect me prowess
    Have some Madeira, M'dear!'

    Then it flashed through her mind what her mother has said with her antepenultimate breath;
    'Oh, My child, is you look on the wine that is red
    then prepare for a fate worse than death!'
    She let go the glass with a shrill little cry
    Crash! Tinkle! It fell to the floor
    When he asked 'What in heaven?' she made no reply,
    Up her mind, and a dash for the door.
    'Have some Madeira, M'dear'
    Rang out down the hall, loud and clear
    A tremulous cry that was filled with despair
    As she paused to take breath in the cool midnight air,
    'Have some Madeira, M'dear!'
    The words seemed to ring in her ear,
    Until the next morning, she woke up in bed
    With a smile on her lips and an ache in her head
    And a beard in her earhole that tickled and said
    'Have some Madeira, M'dear!'

    Roll on Monday! Where once again we experience the joys of an airliner attempting to land on a runway not much bigger than an aircraft carrier.

    Englishman.

  • iggy_the_fish
    iggy_the_fish
    This web site is updated daily with new articles and images from around the island. One of our most popular pages is the 'Live Web Camera' which shows up to the minute views over the harbour and surrounding area of the city and our 'People Cam' where you can see family and friends live on the internet. Take a look at our VRML panorama movies for that extra special experience or browse through our extensive dynamic image libraries.

    Great, we can spy on you on your holiday. You'll be the guy in the union jack shorts, and the knotted hanky on his head, drinking warm beer and eating fish and chips, right?

    ig.

  • GentlyFeral
    GentlyFeral
    HAVE SOME MADEIRA M'DEAR
    by
    Flanders and Swann

    Bless you for posting this, E-man! I heard it on one of the major American variety programs when I was quite young, probably about ten or eleven years old. Tony Randall sang it and I thought it actually was a "Victorian" piece.

    gently feral

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    have a nice hol

    hope to see u in july

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    Sme pics from our last visit:

    Englishman.

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