I was feeling very low today as I realised it is now nearly six years since my wonderful father passed away. He was only 42 and meant so much to me, I still think about him every day, and it still hurts so much that I cant just pick up the phone and talk to him, pop over to his house with cream cakes or just sit down by the sea and talk over my problems with him.
The JWs are responsible for making my grief just that little bit worse, when I was studying with them they told me to get rid of anything in the house that would be displeasing to God, in my desire to do what was required of me I searched through the house, got rid of some bible literature and some other little odds and ends.... also my cruxifix. I now regret that so much, it was one of the only things that my father ever gave to me just from him, not from my mother also.
How I regret that now, if only I could turn the clock back and stop myself, I was so eager to do what I was told, to make sure I was in a good standing with God. How foolish.
I know that a simple necklace is not as important as the wonderful memories that I have of my dad, no-one could ever take those away from me, but I just wish that I had something special of his to keep and maybe pass on to my children. Something that I could hold in my hand and get warm fuzzy feelings from.
I wonder just how many items of sentimental value or even monetary value for that matter have been lost over the years because of their teachings, how many 'demon-possessed' items found their way into the rubbish bin, how many 'items of false worship', how many precious things like mine?