I am unsure of how to feel right now. All testimony was finally given and the closing arguements have been read but we have to go back once again in two weeks to get the judges actual decision.
I am amazed at how stupid their testimony was. Heath admitted that Heather had to serve detention, that he never signs Sierra's homework, that he never calls me in time to got to a
Dr visit, that he always got extra visits with the girls when they lived with me, and had the nerve to claim that I was from Satan.
The clincher was when the judge looked at his little posse of JW's sitting ther that were telling him what to say while he was on the stand. She told them if they did not stop that she would take them out of the court room immed and would not tolerate another one of them to act out as they had.
Even the Guardian ad litum said that she just didn't feel that Heath was very articulate or easily understood things.
But, even tho the evidence proved that it is Jeni not I or Heath that are raising our daughters, that they will never allow them choices as far as religion, higher education, not allow me to even be included as the mother of the bride at their weddings the GAL recommended that sole custody go to Heath!!!!!
Needless to say I was devestated. I cannot believet this. The sad thing is that it was not based on my mental health, which was his reason for modifying in the first place but indtead on the fact that we do not agree on religion and the girls extended family is near them right now.
I tried to tell her that their family will not speak to them when they are with me but she just told me to answer yes or no if the children would have contact with extended family and I said no but I quickly got in that it was my parents that chose to avoid them not I who did not allow it.
So she totally disregarded the testimony that my own father will not speak to me because of religion, that I am willing to let them choose their religion and will take them to meetings if they wish, that I would not allow them to die by refusing a blood transfusion, and that I would never keep them from their father, and that I would encourage higher education.
How? My attorney even went into detail about my little brother who died because of not receiving a blood transfusion.
My attorney still seems to feel confident about the judge being in our favor but I truly felt defeated when the GAL chose Heath. I ws strong. I had tears in my eyes but I just pretended to write on my tablet of paper and blinked my eyes before the tears could fall on my cheeks.
However, I cannot express the emmence pain and heatbreak I felt. Later at home I completely crumpled on the floor and sobbed until I had nothing left. I fear that I will never again take my children to school, take care of them when they are ill, or ever be allowed to make any kind of decision in their lives.
I then spoke to Heather and she said she is getting baptized this Sat as a JW. I feel so strange. There was a time when I waited to share that moment with her. And now I am wanting to be with her to share a momentous moment in her life but cannot help but fear that I will be put even further away from her in the long run.
I made th mistake of getting out their photo albums and seeing my adorable girls growing up with their beautiful smiles and happy times. It just tore me up further.
When I left the court room my Dad gave me the most hateful look that I have ever experienced in my life. How can the court allow my daughter's to possibly face what I have faced with my own father.
I was upset when my attorney chose not to put Mark and my father in law on the stand. I know that she was in a rush to get things done but they could have vouched even more for my health and stability and the situations involving the girls that we have had trouble with. But, as my attorney said most of it was already proved in court by his side anyway or my own testimony.
I am so suddenly afraid. I just simply cannot lose them.
On a happier note I am very proud to announce that my oldest daughter Heather won Student of the Year at school this year.
I am so proud. And to think I taught her to read when she was 4. I knew she was a brilliant child but to know that others see it too was an amazing reward.
I need all the support I can get right now. and thank you for all that you have given me thus far.
Hugs
Shannon
recent custody update
by coppersgirl67 6 Replies latest jw friends
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coppersgirl67
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MelbaToast
Hi Shannon....Im sorry you have to go through this alone. Just remember if you need to talk to someone, we are here for you. Sometimes it just feels better to release. Im sorry I dont have any experience in your situation, but just wanted you to know you have a listening ear.
Oh and by the way, welcome to the board!
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misguided
{{{{ BIG hug }}}}
Rose
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jgnat
Help me understand.
Who is the GAL? The government-appointed lawyer? Would this be a person appointed to look after your daughter's best interests?
The judge has not made the decision yet?
Can I assume that whoever gets custody, there will be court-directed visitation rights?
I think the fastest way to recovery for you and your girls, regardless of the outcome of this court action, is to ask "Where do I go from here?" Whether you are the custodial parent or not, you have a lot of parenting left to do. You will always be an important person in your girls' life.
Grow Close Over The Miles
Don't let the distance divide you! You can improve your relationship with your children no matter how far away you live from them — or for how long you're out of town. 101 Ways to Be a Long-Distance Super Dad...or Mom, Too! provides great ideas to bridge the gap!
"Because Life Goes On...Helping Children and Youth Live with Separation and Divorce" is a publication intended to reach out to Canadian families in need of information and resources to help their children to live through the process of separation and divorce. This booklet is also designed to assist professionals in such fields as social services, health, justice and education, in their work with children and their parents.
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Sunspot
I posted a reply to this thread less than an hour after Shannon wrote it. I came back to see the other comments and my post is gone! Maybe it's just on my end of things---I don't know. Its very strange!
Hopefull I'm not violatng the ROC by posting this twice
(((((((((Shannon)))))))))) I am SO sorry for the devastation that you are feeling. I'm not going to go all chirpy on you by saying it wil be alright, etc......because you simply do not know as yet. I CAN offer many warm hugs and an old soft shoulder to cry on..... I do not and cannot understand where that GAL is coming from. WHAT is she basing her asinine decision ON? Can you ask? I certainly think that you are entitled to a sit-down discussion with this person and be told what the preponderance of the evidence WAS that swayed her!!! It's not as if you were trying to be awarded the washer and dryer! My heart goes out to you and wish I could offer you more......... Annie
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ezekiel3
(((((())))))
No worries Sunspot, Coppers posted twice. You original post is here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/92393/1.ashx
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Sunspot
No worries Sunspot, Coppers posted twice.
Thanks, Ezekiel!!!!!! I honestly thought I was losing it!!!! I hadn't realized that.
Hugs to you, dear .
Annie..........who may be losing it----but not on this thread!