Hi, this is her story - in her own words, emailed to me and posted with her permission...she could use some support to reassure her that she has made the right decision. I'll email her the url this post & your replies.
-e
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In 1977 the man I was engaged to was a ministerial servant. My children were approx. 6 and 7 years old...I was just baptised in July of '77. My children’s friends Jane and Kate * (from the kingdom hall), had been babysitted by my soon to be husband. This was not the first time he babysat the twin girls. As the parents were having marital problems and wanted to get away for the weekend. Then one day very close to my marriage the twins came over to play with mine. One of the twins started crying and told me that while spending the night with my fiance' he was peeping at them in the shower, and she felt like a fly was looking at her. She went on to tell me that they slept with him and he made them sleep in the nude. Then in the middle of the night he wanted her to sleep on top of him. At first my soon to be husband denied the accusations. When I told the elders about the incident a brother Keller* said that she was probably making it up. Then the twins told this to their parents and my fiance finally admitted to it and was put on public reproof and was removed as a servant.
Six months later he again became a servant. I wanted to get out of the commitment of marriage. I was told that once I was engaged it was as if I was already married. I felt there was no way out...so I was married the following April in 1978. Then after several years my children went to the grocery store with my husband and when they returned to the car my husband was masturbating and displayed this to my children. By this time we were living 80 miles away from the incident with the twins. I went to the elders and he denied it. He died in 1985 and was still looked up to as a servant beforehand. After several beatings I took from him I always felt trapped to tell anyone.... He was a paedophile, allowed to remain as a leader in the congregation.
I've always received the blame especially by my daughter for staying with him. To this day neither one of my children wants anything to do with Jehovah’s witnesses. Soon after he died an elder of 25 years had a scam to try and have sex with me, a scam to release him from an unhappy marriage, so he could remarry. His name is Kurt Ashcroft*. I thought he was trying to help me, as I was only 33 years old when I became a widow with 14 and 15 yr old children...he followed me everywhere until I agreed to meet him at a holiday in Lake City, fl. When we went in to talk he picked me up and tried to have sex and I had to fight him off.
He then told me to go straight to tell the elders and he would also to admit to immorality. I was still in shock over the death of my husband. I felt guilty for putting myself in the wrong situation. He was reinstated after six months and I was on public reproof.
This took the life out of me as I was always pioneering. I moved away and used a brother’s van to move with and then I was accused of having an affair. Since I refused to speak to the elders about the brothers van being at my house all night (when he was working 100 miles away) I was notified I was disfellowshipped. I never went back to the organization for 13 yrs. I was reinstated 6 months later.
Now, another nightmare in the congregation. When I married an elder, he coerced my grandson to lay on top on of him like a husband and wife. He said he was just tickling him, I told the elders and separated from him after only a few months of marriage. He tore my home up and gave me a black eye. Then finally was arrested and given probation and to this day never reported in and has a warrant for his arrest. Since he was an elder and was newly reinstated, the congregation seemingly has washed their hands of me as I have been discussed with what has happened.
I do not attend meetings any more in fear of the humiliation and lies he has told them and the sabotage thereafter. Now I believe no man but god can judge me and my actions. I've suffered too much to go back and get more embarrassed. No one comes to see me but they're always concerned about my husband. I am still in good standing but inactive. There is more to my shattered life with these people in the cong. I feel safe from their gossip when I don't associate. Thanks for listening.
*Names have been changed to protect Christina’s privacy.