Ok, here's the deal...

Mastodon

I'm totally stressing out. It's been over a year since I faded out and my mom and me are not getting along too well. She is the only Dub in the family now that I'm out of the bOrg. I left Puerto Rico and moved to San Antonio, TX and that helped my last 'fading' stages. Now my mom is coming to visit from Puerto Rico, and even though she'll be staying at my brother's, I have this feeling of impending doom falling over me. >>>>>>>. See, I'm supposed to drive down this weekend to my cousin's (200 miles away) to spend the 4th of july weekend with them, but I just learned that my mom will be there and that I'm the one who's supposed to drive her back to my brother's. I love my mother, but I know we will have it out. You see, she thinks I left the Borg 'cause I'm a lazy oaf and didn't wanna sacrifice for the 'kingdom'. What she doesn't know is that I'm really an 'apostate' who have written a 20 page document of all the bullsh*t I have discovered about the WTS in the last year or so... Soooo i don't know if I should just let her rant and rave about my piercings and my tattoo and just ignore her, or just bring out the big guns and let her have it! I thought of telling her that if she wants to have that conversation, one of two things will happen, A) She will never ever talk to me again, or B) She will end up eventually leaving the Borg...... What do you guys think will happen???

Doubtfully Yours

You love your mother. Do not disrespect her.

If she starts up with you, tell her you love her and respect her and would like her to understand that you will both disagree when it comes to the WBTS stuff. Ask her to try and have a wonderful conversation by finding a topic you could both agree on.

You love your mother. Do not disrespect her.

DY

jeanniebeanz

Have you tried just telling her that there certain subjects that are off-limits? It's kind of hard to fight when one party is a brick wall.

If your only response to her tirades is, "Mom, I love you. However, we are not going to have this conversation; ever." she may tire out and quit trying.

What do you think?

J

Sad emo

I love my mother, but I know we will have it out.

It might not happen. I can only talk from the way I've sometimes gone about handling my own issues, I've found that if you go in expecting bad to happen then it has more chance of happening because you're already on the defensive and they've more chance of picking up the 'vibes'

Whether it does or doesn't happen, just stay cool and take lots of deep breaths!

If you do end up having it out with her, I hope she goes for option B!

Hope all goes well. Let us know.

AlanF

It all depends on what you want your future relationship to be. You can play dumb, or just say firmly that you're not going to discuss JW issues. Or you can have it out, and let the chips fall where they may. Only you know your mother well enough to judge, and you may well be terribly wrong.

AlanF

Thegoodgirl

Don't burn your bridges, you can't take back what you say. I would maybe say some "non-apostate" sounding things like, "But it always bothered me when Br. soandso did this and this and he still was in the truth". I always use that kind of logic when my mom starts with me. She is always saying how loving the congregation is and how if we only apply Jehovah's principles our lives would be just fantastically wonderful, and I'm like, hmmm, what about this person and that person in the Hall? Hoping it makes her stop and think a little bit, and realize she may be the only one really beleiving all the crap.

Mastodon

Thank you all for your replies... It's good stuff and it's making me think a lot. My first instinct is to play dumb. But if she starts anything I'll try to use DY's suggestions. I want to avoid a fight...

4JWY

You love your mother. Do not disrespect her.

In reference to that comment, I fail to see how talking to your mother would be disrespecting her.

You could explain to her that she will be much happier in her own existence if she accepts the fact that you are a human being with your own thinking ability and separated from her at the time of birth, fully prepared to go through life using your own brain. Does she believe we are to judge one another for doing so?

Loving a person, is allowing them to be who they are.

Enjoy the time together

Es

I like what you said bout giving her the two options...and she was she says. I wish our parents could just respect us for who we are and not who they want us to be. Im in the same boat :( es

Ok, here's the deal...

Share this