No thanks to DOC, I am a myspace junkie now, and have found a few of my hometown friends in the mix of things.
So I do the search for friends, and start typing in different names.
Long story short, I found my old friend from KH days, we got dfd around the same time and had a falling out about a year afterward. We havent spoke since, and didn't leave things in good terms as friends. I regret that we were so immature and couldn't work out our differences, because she was a great friend. But at the end of our last conversation, she stated that she no longer thought of me as her friend (because I left our hometown quite abruptly), and we would be better off going our seperate ways.
Its been 7 years since we spoke, and many days have gone by since that conversation. My father died, she didn't go to the memorial (which I was upset but not shocked by any way, because it was at the KH)
I recently sent a message to her profile, but she hasnt been on the site since January of this year, so I don't know if she will ever see the message. The gist of the message was this: I know we had some issues, you were a very close friend, I wonder how she's doing every day and I miss her. It was short, sweet, and what I have needed to say to her for the past 7 years.
I also checked out her little brother, he is currently going to the local university, and is living at the dorms. I sent him a message also that I missed him, his bro and sis, and wish him well on his university journey. So I feel like he is on his way out of the borg, but don't know how far yet.
His profile stated that he was on that day, earlier, so I know he got the message.
I havent recieved any response from either, and yes I am disappointed, but not shocked. Their dad stepped down from being an elder when his daughter got dfd, but his attitude hasn't changed. At my dads memorial I tried to say something to him, but all I got in return was a "You know I cant talk to you"
I have a strange feeling that this will bite me in the ass before it is over with, his dad still attends my moms hall.
Anyone ever had any success with finding someone and actually being receptive? I need some positive feedback today
advice welcome-contacting people
by MelbaToast 3 Replies latest social relationships
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MelbaToast
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jgnat
Not a JW here, but I was estranged from various members of my family for a time, and we worked it out. I give this advice to friends who step out on a limb.
Imagine the WORST thing that can happen. Is that survivable? Then, don't worry about it.
The WORST thing that can happen here is that they don't respond. What will you have lost? Nothing.
You have done a wonderful thing, you have opened a door. Get on with the rest of your life, and maybe you will get a pleasant surprise one day.
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tijkmo
i have an ex friend that i miss ...and was hurt by..so much that if he tried to get in contact i have this feeling that i would want to tell him where to go but in all honesty i know i wouldnt beacause i wouldnt want him to...but i dont think i could re contact him cos i couldnt take the rejection
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MelbaToast
Janet: Thanks for the insight hon, you always make me feel better! It did feel better, like a little weight had been lifted, because I put the ball in her court, in a non threatening way. Also reminded me of one of the last steps , where you have to ask for forgiveness and forgive yourself, along with others. I was in my hometown a few weeks ago and wanted to see her, but I didnt know where she was living, and I couldn't get the gumption up to call her name listed in the yellow pages. I really want to make sure she is doing ok, my friend that od'd a couple of years ago, we were all friends, and I want to check on her, make sure that she knows someone cares about her.
tj- I know how you feel, I have been there too, when wounds were still fresh. It is difficult to get through, but you are doing a great job! Give it time, it will get better.