When is sex acceptable

stephenw20

Can anyone comment on this

it appears that in our universe we have differing rules pertaining to sex being acceptable or not.

When you married , you are suppose to only have sex with your spouse.

If you are not married or have never been in a committed realtionship, it seems at a certain stage of ones life, it is either understandable or acceptable to just have or maintain a relationship that has nothing to do with anything but sex, or the closeness of another human being.

Perhaps there were failed relationships that someone does not want to indulge in again , but still want to feel close to another person for a limited amount of time.

I am finding this to be acceptable not just among males but females as well in the 30-40 age range. We humans are a strange breed.

Comments are appreciated.
Ps I am quite familiar with the biblical texts... I would rather not go there on this thread/

Prisca

Interesting thoughts.

I have to admit that I often wish for some sexual companionship, without the emotional hassles involved. I am single, haven't had a real b/f since I broke up with my then-fiance 18 months ago. I am looking for a life partner, but in the meantime you think, hmm... it would be nice to have someone just for tonight....

I am still struggling with the JW morals I grew up with. I tend to think that sex in a committed relationship is fine, but am struggling with the concept of casual sex. I believe sex is better when it means something to the individuals involved, not just wham, bam, thank you ma'am! As a single person who has no physical contact with anyone except for the occasional hug with a friend, it complicates the issue when you start to crave for a bit of harmless sexual fun.

I agree with your comment about humans being a strange breed. We certainly are!

edited for spelling errors!!

MegaDude

My two sense.
Well, I believe what you focus on is what you get.
That being said, there are many a times I would like to take someone home just for a roll in the hay as it were. We are made to have sexual desires and it's healthy for them to be satisfied. I think the pitfall in just sleeping with someone casually is it encourages this behavior in yourself to where it becomes routine. It distracts you and takes focus away from what you really want, a mate to share the rest of your life with.

Also, you need to be careful out there. One in five Americans carries genital herpes. There are lots of other diseases out there that are permanent once acquired... even fatal, as you well know. It's been my experience that people who have gotten these STD's are happy to give them to you. They don't like feeling like an excluded minority and the feel if they have it, they will give it to everybody else.

crbloss

I too am single and have a daugther.. let me just say that when considering causal sex, committed relationship
sex or any other type of sex outside of marriage you need to think of the outcome. After raising my
daugther alone for 3 years, I have finally learned that Jehovah made that rule for a reason.
Don't get me wrong, there are times I pray really hard for a suitable compaion. But, when I start desiring
sex too much, I get up and do something else. Be very careful out there. This world is a true mess.
You can get things you don't really want from death(AIDS) all the way down to a broken heart just
for a few hours of fun.

Francois

I have - like most people - had some interesting sexual relationships over the years, and they do change as you get older it seems.

There were the one-night stands at assemblies, and in college.

There were the more or less long-term relationships in my 30s and 40s. But during this time when there were long periods of no relationship, I was fortunate to discover, um, buddies as they are called (Alright. I did clean it up). These folks were in the same boat as me, in need, and wanted the same thing: a friend. And a friend in need is a friend indeed .

These were friends you could call up anytime and say "wanna get together this evening?" And ANY answer was OK. And sometimes dinner was in the offing and sometimes not. Sometimes overnight was involved and sometimes not. I've experienced times when someone called and said "I'm at the Seven-Eleven around the corner from your house. Mind if I drop in for an hour?" And again ANY answer was OK. Never an argument over availability. Never an argument period. (Makes you wonder doesn't it?) And I've been on the other side of that phone call too. I think sex is acceptable when you need it. It's acceptable because you need it, and for no other reason. Albeit you do have to be more careful in these times.

There have been about a half-dozen of these "buddies" in my life. And I remember each and every one of them with love and affection. And would still do anything for them. Anything.

Francois.

crossroads

Stephen I didn't notice this until today. My answer it
is all black and white and you'll know when it is
alright. I woke up this morning thinking of her,
"Those were the happiest days of my life" more
happiness in three weeks with her than 20years
with Jo. So this is for Nick and me(seems like I have a thing
about guy names for women)

I FOUND A PICTURE OF YOU, OH OH OH OH
WHAT HIJACKED MY WORLD THAT NIGHT
TO A PLACE IN THE PAST
WE'VE BEEN CAST OUT OF? OH OH OH OH
NOW WE'RE BACK IN THE FIGHT
WE'RE BACK ON THE TRAIN
OH, BACK ON THE CHAIN GANG

A CIRCUMSTANCE BEYOND OUR CONTROL, OH OH OH OH
THE PHONE, THE TV AND THE NEWS OF THE WORLD
GOT IN THE HOUSE LIKE A PIGEON FROM HELL, OH OH OH OH
THREW SAND IN OUR EYES AND DESCENDED LIKE FLIES
PUT US BACK ON THE TRAIN
OH, BACK ON THE CHAIN GANG

THE POWERS THAT BE
THAT FORCE US TO LIVE LIKE WE DO
BRING ME TO MY KNEES
WHEN I SEE WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOU
BUT I'LL DIE AS I STAND HERE TODAY
KNOWING THAT DEEP IN MY HEART
THEY'LL FALL TO RUIN ONE DAY
FOR MAKING US PART

I FOUND A PICTURE OF YOU, OH OH OH OH
THOSE WERE THE HAPPIEST DAYS OF MY LIFE
LIKE A BREAK IN THE BATTLE WAS YOUR PART, OH OH OH OH
IN THE WRETCHED LIFE OF A LONELY HEART
NOW WE'RE BACK ON THE TRAIN
OH, BACK ON THE CHAIN GANG

I'm glad I went against ALL that I was taught.

somebody

hi stephen,

If you are not married or have never been in a committed realtionship, it seems at a certain stage of ones life, it is either understandable or acceptable to just have or maintain a relationship that has nothing to do with anything but sex, or the closeness of another human being.

Maybe when we hit a certain age we just don't care to deal with the emotional part of relationships that Prisca was speaking about. Coming from a woman who has been with a mate for 20 years, I find myself thinking about leading a life without love sometimes, when I'm freed. Love and sex don't necessarily have to go together. One is an emotion, one is an act. The emotional part can wear a person down. ( the sexual part can too, but that's the good kind of wearing down, not the bad kind. )

peace,
somebody

Jim Lad

Somebody: There you go again being the horndog I approve of!

scott73

from the time i was 6 until 26 i was taught how even the thought of sex was wrong. this put a huge guilt trip on me. We are human and have needs especially as we get older. You'll end up going crazy if you don't. So if you feel the need then go for it. Aren't we supposed to enjoy life?

stephenw20

Scott,,welcome and thanks for the response... I thank everyone for the responses...

I would say ~yes~! we are suppose to enjoy life, as well as expereince pain, joy ,sorrow, happiness.

I would say we are here to #learn# .. not good or bad
just
period
learn

sex is part of that
..
when you can bond with anyone
I dont care on what level it is
it should be valued , not ostracized.

if we are open to who people ~are~ as opposed to who we need them to be

what else can be more spiritual and more of a compliment ...

we acknowlege another being on this earth, created and put here by the same force as got us here.........

acknowleging that person , acknowleges that source of life......

S

When is sex acceptable

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