Why do people need to tell everyone that the WTS is wrong

by Lady Lee 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    A problem arises when a person leaves or is booted out and slowly discovers the real truth about the WTS. There often is an intense sense of betrayal. It can be traumatic for many people. And people who have been traumatized need to go through a certain process to recover.

    One thing that is deeply needed is to find a way to make sense of this new information that goes so much against everything that the JWs are taught. I agree that many people try to get others out and have this intense need to "save" others from the WTS or to warn others about the dangers. In doing this, however, they are very often trying to work through the trauma themselves. In the retelling and the explaining the process of recovery is started. We have a need to prove to ourselves that it really was that bad and we have a right to feel betrayed and angry.

    For those who are leaving any belief system the internet can help facilitate the gathering of new information and sharing stories that can hasten the recovery process.

    When I left the JWs 20 years ago I was so isolated. We couldn't speak to JWs and we couldn't speak to x-JWs and no one else understood. I know I was scared to read "apostate information. I think it was so much harder before I got on the interent.

    Now people can get information even before they leave and find out just how wrong the WTS is. I think it makes the whole process so much easier and faster.

    But getting the information is only one part of the recovery. Finding ways to explain it to others can be a way to process it ourselves and move the recovery along at a much faster rate. Talking to others who have left, helps us feels less alone and gives us the opportunity to verify and validate the new information and our own feelings about the trauma of realizing we were betrayed.

    And after living the mentally secluded life of a JW it can be very helpful to explore our own ability to reason and assess any new information we learn. We learn a lot of skills that JWs miss out on by coming to sites like this. Our ability to interact with others was severely hampered as JWs. We were given a "community" of friends who all believed the same thing and did the same things. We lost out on diversity and differences and that the differences can enrich our lives. We need learn that everything isn't black or white but all the colors of the rainbow. We even need to learn about what kinds of things we like after being so limited for so long. Especailly for those who were born into it and have never had a chance to try new things the need to experiment can be tremendous and sometimes even wind up hurting themselves in there attempts to find their own belief system.

    Trauma can be paralizing. But we don't need to stay in that place. Talking to others whether they are/were JWs or to those who were never JWs provides us with a strong tool to help us all move that process along. And sharing what we have learned provides others with the support needed to travel the road to recovery.

    Lee

  • Scully
    Scully

    Maybe it's a throwback to the JW training. They trained us to point out the flaws in every other belief system, fearlessly, even at the risk of imprisonment or abuse from others.

    Maybe it's a form of penance. A way to make up for our being blinded and brainwashed, and trying to give meaning to the things we suffered at the hands of JWs by making sure that others either have an opportunity to leave the JWs or learn things that will prevent them from ever becoming JWs.

    Someone once asked me why I would talk about the WTS's errors and things I knew about the JWs. I thought about it for a while, and realized that first of all, talking about WTS errors and JW brainwashing and spiritual abuse is the LAST thing the WTS would want me to do. They would just as soon have me shut up and forget about it and move on with my life. In addition to that, I think about the scripture that they drilled into us about how important it was to share The Truth™ with others in the face of adversity:

    Acts 4:15-20

    So they commanded them to go outside the San'he-drin hall, and they began consulting with one another, saying: "What shall we do with these men? Because, for a fact, a noteworthy sign has occurred through them, one manifest to all the inhabitants of Jerusalem; and we cannot deny it. Nevertheless, in order that it may not be spread further among the people, let us tell them with threats not to speak anymore upon the basis of this name to any man at all."

    With that, they called them and charged them, nowhere to make any utterance or to teach upon the basis of the name of Jesus. But in reply, Peter and John said to them: "Whether it is righteous in the sight of God to listen to you rather than to God, judge for yourselves. But as for us, we cannot stop speaking about the things we have seen and heard."

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee
    They would just as soon have me shut up and forget about it and move on with my life.

    Yes Scully I am sure they want us to just go silently away. But there are too many of us now. And I just won't be silent for an abusive system or person any longer

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    (Leviticus 5:1) 5 "‘Now in case a soul sins in that he has heard public cursing and he is a witness or he has seen it or has come to know of it, if he does not report it, then he must answer for his error.

  • sf
    sf

    Great thread!

    Lots of dynamics.

    sKally

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    As a non-JW, I see it as a "buyer beware" sort of thing. I also speak out about urban legends and pyramid schemes.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    Interesting topic. Thanks for starting it.
    I think I followed a pattern many understand. I got pissed at the Witness people for the error they they taught and for the error they denied, for the way they treated me and my family, and for insulting me. In a conscious way, I didn't believe in the Watch Tower Society nor did I trust or like the Witness people. Since I was raised as a Witness, I had a core belief system that tied back to the Witness teachings of the 1950's. When I took my small children to the Witness group meetings, I had PTSD flashbacks to abuse witnessed and abuse suffered from Witness people. I couldn't stand going anymore. When I left, I blamed myself, but I couldn't stand going anymore.
    I didn't like the Witness religion, I didn't like the Witness owned book publishing business, and I didn't like Witness people, but I was marching to their drums in a self defeating way. I planned for the long view but I lived the short life. I made plans for the future but I lived with a feeling of impending doom just under the surface. I guess I lived in conflict.
    The story The Goose in the book, ADULT CHILDREN The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families by: John C. Friel, Linda D. Friel kind of reflected the way I felt after my awakening.
    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/55403/1.ashx





  • kazar
    kazar

    Good topic. No one except my best friend knows that I was once one of Jehovah's Witnesses--and I don't tell them. I have not had an opportunity to tell anyone that the WTS is wrong except on this board.

  • Golf
    Golf

    Greetings Lady Lee. I hope your in good health.

    As to your question, I don't. I have more useful and positive things to do than waste my time talking about the WTS. I have a life to live and by George I'm living it.

    Take care and the best.

    Golf

  • crazyblondeb
    crazyblondeb

    To me it's kinda like if you bought a defective item and the company wouldn't make good on it. Wouldn't you want others to know so they wouldn't make the same mistake??

    The WBTS took my family, friends, and my innocence. They want us to roll over and play "dead". Not me, I'm going kicking and screaming all the way. It I can help just one person be free of them, it's worth it.

    shelley

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