Cult construction set

SeymourButts

http://www.fadetoblack.com/cultkit/

Plug in your requirements and this kit will provide the scriptural backing

JH

Religion Name: Christ’s Little Helpers
POLYGAMY	Judges 8-30	And Gideon had threescore and ten sons of his body begotten- for he had many wives.
GAY BASHING	Leviticus 20-13	If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination- they shall surely be put to death; their blood [shall be] upon them.
LEATHER FETISH	Matthew 3-4	This man John wore a garment of camel's hair, and a loincloth of leather; and he lived upon locusts and wild honey.
LEATHER FETISH	2 Kings 1-8	And they answered him, [He was] an hairy man, and girt with a girdle of leather about his loins. And he said, It [is] Elijah the Tishbite.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	The following scriptures support that O.J. Simpson is the resuracted Christ in human form walking among us.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson was widely hated among large portion of the population. The Bible talk that Holy One will be despised by his people.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Isaiah 53-3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief- and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-6 But I [am] a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 109-25 I became also a reproach unto them- [when] they looked upon me they shaked their heads.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-7 All they that see me laugh me to scorn- they shoot out the lip, they shake the head.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson had a cut on his hand, as well as having blood on his socks, filling the prophesy in Psalm 22-16 For dogs have compassed me- the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me- they pierced my hands and my feet.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	The L.A. PD took in a lot of O.J. Simpson's clothing for investigation.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-18 They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	O.J. Simpson was not convicted nor was any bone in his body broken filling the prophecy of Psalm 22-17 I may tell all my bones- they look [and] stare upon me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Exodus 12-46 In one house shall it be eaten; thou shalt not carry forth ought of the flesh abroad out of the house; neither shall ye break a bone thereof.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 34-20 He keepeth all his bones- not one of them is broken.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Numerous false witnesses were brought against O.J. Simpson during the trial filling the prophecy of Psalm 31-11 I was a reproach among all mine enemies, but especially among my neighbours, and a fear to mine acquaintance- they that did see me without fled from me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	After the trial majority of OJ Simpsons friends abandoned him filling the prophecy of Psalm 38-11 My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my sore; and my kinsmen stand afar off.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Kato Kaelin as well as Rosa Lopez and other friends of OJ testified against him fufilling the prophecy of Psalm 41-9 Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up [his] heel against me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	During the trial OJ Simpson did not testify also filling the prohecy of Isaiah 53-7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth- he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson's inocents was portrayed on the video tape he put out, which was priced at $30 ($29.95) This fullfilled the prophecy of Zechariah 11-12 And I said unto them, If ye think good, give [me] my price; and if not, forbear. So they weighed for my price thirty [pieces] of silver.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	It is also stated in Revelation 1-14 that the Messiah will be of African decent. "His head and [his] hairs [were] ... like wool".
ANTI-CHRIST	Dali Lama	Dali Lama was born on 06/06/1935. If one adds up all the digits in the year of Dali Lama's birth (1935) 1+9+3+5 one comes up with 18. If one takes the number of the beast (666) and adds up all the digits one also comes up with 18. As well as 6th day of the 6th month.

kittyeatzjdubs

Below are the Biblical Scriptures that will help support your new religion.

Religion Name: Atheists for Jesus
SLAM DANCING	2 Samuel 6-14	And David danced before the LORD with all [his] might; and David [was] girded with a linen ephod.
JUSTIFIABLE MURDER DUE TO ADULTERY	Leviticus 20-10	And the man that committeth adultery with [another] man's wife, [even he] that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.-
NYMPHOMANIA	Genesis 1-22	And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
NYMPHOMANIA	Genesis 9-1	And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.
NYMPHOMANIA	Genesis 28-3	And God Almighty bless thee, and make thee fruitful, and multiply thee, that thou mayest be a multitude of people.
MESSIAH	Johnny Winter	It is writen in Revelation 1-14 His head and [his] hairs [were] white like wool, as white as snow; and his eyes [were] as a flame of fire
ANTI-CHRIST	not among us	The Dark One is not yet among us.

Now you are ready to take your new found faith to the awaiting sheep.

You may find that people may take offense to your beliefs, so here are a few scriptures that you can quote to support your faith, and criticize their lack of understanding.

Mark 16:15 'They may look and look but not see, and listen and listen but not understand, lest perchance they should return and be pardoned.'
Luke 2:50 But they did not understand the significance of these words.
Acts 7:25 He supposed his brethren to be aware that by him God was sending them deliverance; this, however, they did not understand.

In Mark 16:15 The Bible talks about spreading your belief with others "Go the whole world over, and proclaim the Good News to all mankind. "So if you think you have a Biblical Scripture that can support some strange practice let us know so we can add it to the Cult Construction Set.

Feel free to print out this screen for reference, as well as making pamphlets to hand out to people.

Good luck and may the Lord be with you.

yay!!!! now i'm tax free!

luv, jojo

tetrapod.sapien

LOL!!

Honesty

This is too funny!!!

No wonder the boyz in Crooklyn don't want the flock on the 'net. Competition is always bad for them.

Legolas

Religion Name: Atheists for Jesus
ALCOHOLISM	Numbers 15-10	And thou shalt bring for a drink offering half an hin of wine, [for] an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.
ALCOHOLISM	Ecclesiastes 9-7	Go thy way, eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with a merry heart; for God now accepteth thy works.
ALCOHOLISM	Song of Solomon 5-1	I am come into my garden, my sister, [my] spouse- I have gathered my myrrh with my spice; I have eaten my honeycomb with my honey; I have drunk my wine with my milk- eat, O friends; drink, yea, drink abundantly, O beloved.
ALCOHOLISM	John 4-46	So Jesus came again into Cana of Galilee, where he made the water wine. And there was a certain nobleman, whose son was sick at Capernaum.
JUSTIFIABLE MURDER DUE TO ADULTERY	Leviticus 20-10	And the man that committeth adultery with [another] man's wife, [even he] that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.-
FOOT FETISH	Luke 7-45	Thou gavest me no kiss- but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.
FOOT FETISH	John 12-3	Then took Mary a pound of ointment of spikenard, very costly, and anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair- and the house was filled with the odour of the ointment.
MESSIAH	not arrived	The Messiah has not yet arrived.
ANTI-CHRIST	not among us	The Dark One is not yet among us.

Now you are ready to take your new found faith to the awaiting sheep.

You may find that people may take offense to your beliefs, so here are a few scriptures that you can quote to support your faith, and criticize their lack of understanding.

Mark 16:15 'They may look and look but not see, and listen and listen but not understand, lest perchance they should return and be pardoned.'
Luke 2:50 But they did not understand the significance of these words.
Acts 7:25 He supposed his brethren to be aware that by him God was sending them deliverance; this, however, they did not understand.

In Mark 16:15 The Bible talks about spreading your belief with others "Go the whole world over, and proclaim the Good News to all mankind. "So if you think you have a Biblical Scripture that can support some strange practice let us know so we can add it to the Cult Construction Set.

Feel free to print out this screen for reference, as well as making pamphlets to hand out to people.

Good luck and may the Lord be with you.

kittyeatzjdubs

WE HAVE NEW LIGHT!!! CHANGES MUST BE MADE!

Religion Name: Atheists for Jesus
POLYGAMY	Judges 8-30	And Gideon had threescore and ten sons of his body begotten- for he had many wives.
ANTI-SEMITISM	John 5-18	On this account then the Jews were all the more eager to put Him to death--because He not only broke the Sabbath, but also spoke of God as being in a special sense His Father, thus putting Himself on a level with God.
ANTI-SEMITISM	John 6-41	Now the Jews began to find fault about Him because of His claiming to be the bread which came down out of Heaven.
ANTI-SEMITISM	John 7-1	After this Jesus moved from place to place in Galilee. He would not go about in Judaea, because the Jews were seeking an opportunity to kill Him.
EXHIBITIONISM	Genesis 2-25	And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
EXHIBITIONISM	Isaiah 20-2	At the same time spake the LORD by Isaiah the son of Amoz, saying, Go and loose the sackcloth from off thy loins, and put off thy shoe from thy foot. And he did so, walking naked and barefoot.
EXHIBITIONISM	Isaiah 20-3	And the LORD said, Like as my servant Isaiah hath walked naked and barefoot three years [for] a sign and wonder upon Egypt and upon Ethiopia
EXHIBITIONISM	John 21-7	Therefore that disciple whom Jesus loved saith unto Peter, It is the Lord. Now when Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he girt [his] fisher's coat [unto him], (for he was naked,) and did cast himself into the sea.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	The following scriptures support that O.J. Simpson is the resuracted Christ in human form walking among us.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson was widely hated among large portion of the population. The Bible talk that Holy One will be despised by his people.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Isaiah 53-3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief- and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-6 But I [am] a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 109-25 I became also a reproach unto them- [when] they looked upon me they shaked their heads.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-7 All they that see me laugh me to scorn- they shoot out the lip, they shake the head.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson had a cut on his hand, as well as having blood on his socks, filling the prophesy in Psalm 22-16 For dogs have compassed me- the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me- they pierced my hands and my feet.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	The L.A. PD took in a lot of O.J. Simpson's clothing for investigation.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 22-18 They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	O.J. Simpson was not convicted nor was any bone in his body broken filling the prophecy of Psalm 22-17 I may tell all my bones- they look [and] stare upon me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Exodus 12-46 In one house shall it be eaten; thou shalt not carry forth ought of the flesh abroad out of the house; neither shall ye break a bone thereof.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Psalm 34-20 He keepeth all his bones- not one of them is broken.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Numerous false witnesses were brought against O.J. Simpson during the trial filling the prophecy of Psalm 31-11 I was a reproach among all mine enemies, but especially among my neighbours, and a fear to mine acquaintance- they that did see me without fled from me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	After the trial majority of OJ Simpsons friends abandoned him filling the prophecy of Psalm 38-11 My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my sore; and my kinsmen stand afar off.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	Kato Kaelin as well as Rosa Lopez and other friends of OJ testified against him fufilling the prophecy of Psalm 41-9 Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up [his] heel against me.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	During the trial OJ Simpson did not testify also filling the prohecy of Isaiah 53-7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth- he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	OJ Simpson's inocents was portrayed on the video tape he put out, which was priced at $30 ($29.95) This fullfilled the prophecy of Zechariah 11-12 And I said unto them, If ye think good, give [me] my price; and if not, forbear. So they weighed for my price thirty [pieces] of silver.
MESSIAH	O.J. Simpson	It is also stated in Revelation 1-14 that the Messiah will be of African decent. "His head and [his] hairs [were] ... like wool".
ANTI-CHRIST	Dali Lama	Dali Lama was born on 06/06/1935. If one adds up all the digits in the year of Dali Lama's birth (1935) 1+9+3+5 one comes up with 18. If one takes the number of the beast (666) and adds up all the digits one also comes up with 18. As well as 6th day of the 6th month.

Now you are ready to take your new found faith to the awaiting sheep.
You may find that people may take offense to your beliefs, so here are a few scriptures that you can quote to support your faith, and criticize their lack of understanding.
Mark 16:15 'They may look and look but not see, and listen and listen but not understand, lest perchance they should return and be pardoned.'
Luke 2:50 But they did not understand the significance of these words.
Acts 7:25 He supposed his brethren to be aware that by him God was sending them deliverance; this, however, they did not understand.

In Mark 16:15 The Bible talks about spreading your belief with others "Go the whole world over, and proclaim the Good News to all mankind. "So if you think you have a Biblical Scripture that can support some strange practice let us know so we can add it to the Cult Construction Set.

Feel free to print out this screen for reference, as well as making pamphlets to hand out to people.

Good luck and may the Lord be with you.

AlmostAtheist

Oh, this is TOO fun! Thanks!

Below are the Biblical Scriptures that will help support your new religion.

Religion Name: Brunch Davidiots
ANOREXIA	Deuteronomy 9-18	And I fell down before the LORD, as at the first, forty days and forty nights- I did neither eat bread, nor drink water, because of all your sins which ye sinned, in doing wickedly in the sight of the LORD, to provoke him to anger.
JUSTIFIABLE MURDER DUE TO ADULTERY	Leviticus 20-10	And the man that committeth adultery with [another] man's wife, [even he] that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.-
EXHIBITIONISM	Genesis 2-25	And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
EXHIBITIONISM	Isaiah 20-2	At the same time spake the LORD by Isaiah the son of Amoz, saying, Go and loose the sackcloth from off thy loins, and put off thy shoe from thy foot. And he did so, walking naked and barefoot.
EXHIBITIONISM	Isaiah 20-3	And the LORD said, Like as my servant Isaiah hath walked naked and barefoot three years [for] a sign and wonder upon Egypt and upon Ethiopia
EXHIBITIONISM	John 21-7	Therefore that disciple whom Jesus loved saith unto Peter, It is the Lord. Now when Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he girt [his] fisher's coat [unto him], (for he was naked,) and did cast himself into the sea.
MESSIAH	not arrived	The Messiah has not yet arrived.
ANTI-CHRIST	Dali Lama	Dali Lama was born on 06/06/1935. If one adds up all the digits in the year of Dali Lama's birth (1935) 1+9+3+5 one comes up with 18. If one takes the number of the beast (666) and adds up all the digits one also comes up with 18. As well as 6th day of the 6th month.

Now you are ready to take your new found faith to the awaiting sheep.

You may find that people may take offense to your beliefs, so here are a few scriptures that you can quote to support your faith, and criticize their lack of understanding.

Mark 16:15 'They may look and look but not see, and listen and listen but not understand, lest perchance they should return and be pardoned.'
Luke 2:50 But they did not understand the significance of these words.
Acts 7:25 He supposed his brethren to be aware that by him God was sending them deliverance; this, however, they did not understand.

In Mark 16:15 The Bible talks about spreading your belief with others "Go the whole world over, and proclaim the Good News to all mankind. "So if you think you have a Biblical Scripture that can support some strange practice let us know so we can add it to the Cult Construction Set.

Feel free to print out this screen for reference, as well as making pamphlets to hand out to people.

Good luck and may the Lord be with you.

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Comedy Magazine

Generic Man

If only the old men from Brooklyn would use their deceptive powers to allow nymphomania in the org.!

Leolaia

It only has a rather narrow range of selections. Below are the Biblical Scriptures that will help support your new religion.

Religion Name: HOLY CHURCH OF NAVEL LINT
ANOREXIA	Deuteronomy 9-18	And I fell down before the LORD, as at the first, forty days and forty nights- I did neither eat bread, nor drink water, because of all your sins which ye sinned, in doing wickedly in the sight of the LORD, to provoke him to anger.
JUSTIFIABLE MURDER DUE TO ADULTERY	Leviticus 20-10	And the man that committeth adultery with [another] man's wife, [even he] that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.-
FOOT FETISH	Luke 7-45	Thou gavest me no kiss- but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.
FOOT FETISH	John 12-3	Then took Mary a pound of ointment of spikenard, very costly, and anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair- and the house was filled with the odour of the ointment.
MESSIAH	not arrived	The Messiah has not yet arrived.
ANTI-CHRIST	Judge Wapner	Judge Wapner's full name is Joseph Albert Wapner. Each word in his name poseses 6 letters, making him the holder of 666 as taled about in Revelation 13-18 Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast- for it is the number of a man; and his number [is] Six hundred threescore [and] six.

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