Hello JWN! Im a 22 yr active JW and I recently realized the truth about the truth. Im from an african country where most people dont think critically and just accept things as they are without questioning. I am a born-in, JW and was also a mindless drone till my time in college. Now I see why they hammer on the higher education thing. All along from childhood I had doubts but suppressed them with: "We are the only ones who preach and light gets brighter and all that stuff..... .But during university I found myself asking lots of questions and I prayed to God to let me serve him with my heart not because I have been told to. All what I have seen with my eyes in the org has proven otherwise from what they claim to be. I am fatherless and the elders have no clue how to provide fatherly love. All they care about is how many hours you put in and what " spiritual goals" you had and how the WT can make use of you. I was surprised only those outside the org were able to show me genuine love and affection. All the hypocrisy, lack of love, fakeness, seeking attention, a**-kissing, politics, double standards, flip flopping doctrines, thought-stopping techniques, and shallowness of elders and MSs have shown me this org is not directed by any holy spirit as they claim. I couldnt believe it when I realized the sheer amount of control I and other JWs are under. One elder even told me He has to be loyal to the governing body. Ugh that was stupid. "They don't even know him to know you". I then realized how the GB has equated themselves with God. What a Shame. I have a lot to write but I don't want to bore you.....bottom line: I'm glad I've awaken and I have an enormous amount of peace in me without fear and guilt. I'm thankful to the numerous websites like this one that have validated my doubts. For now i have to stay in cos the cost of leaving is too big for me to carry. My whole family is strongly in it and there is no way I can convince even one of them of the illusion theyre under. I'll wait till I leave the country or I become very independent PS: any other person from an African country here?