Aww thanks guys for your lovely comments :) Its actually my Grandparents not my parents - my Grandma and Grandad. I dont know what I would do without them!
FeelingFree
JoinedPosts by FeelingFree
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16
Is this desperation or common? What have you seen?
by Wasanelder Once ina "sister" i know is in her late 80's.
her friend was 90 and on her deathbed.
(just a week ago.
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16
Is this desperation or common? What have you seen?
by Wasanelder Once ina "sister" i know is in her late 80's.
her friend was 90 and on her deathbed.
(just a week ago.
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FeelingFree
My Grandparents both in their 80's became witnesses a long time ago after being called on. Bought their children up in the religion and stayed in for many years. Lived through the 1975 teaching and still remained faithfull if not a little bitter. Went through a terrible time with my mum who needed major surgery and received so much pressure for her to have a blood transfusion but resisted.
They have woken up to the TTATT during the past few years, now neither of them believe it and feel very upset they wasted so much time and energy in this religion. Also they feel terrible that their children's lives were "ruined" by the org. In fact they have been instrumental in helping me and my husband realise that this really isn't the true religion. Now we have left the org after a rubbish fade they have been my greatest support. When I sometimes doubted my decision (not that I do anymore) they always proved to me that what I am doing IS right. Though I know if I had stayed in they would of supported me regardless.
I feel sorry for them but then they thought they were doing what was best at the time just like all parents. They are just so pleased I have stopped the cycle now and another generation (my kids) wont have to go through it all. I love them very much.
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36
Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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FeelingFree
Daniel - it must really depend on who your elders are, as I would think your situation was pretty rare?
Cultbgone - Haha I know exactly what you mean about new studies they are far too full on. Me and my husband are keeping our mouths closed as to why we don't want to go anymore. I think it's the safest thing to do and also I believe that everybody should be allowed to believe what they want and I dont want to go around mouthing off my opinions trying to change people's minds. It's one of the things I dislike about witnesses so much, feeling they have to tell everybody they are right and everybody else is wrong.
Thanks all for your thoughts.
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Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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FeelingFree
Steve2 - I know full well I will get disfellowshiped the moment I open my mouth to an elder or even a member of the cong. The reason I mentioned the "love bombing" was because I felt it was quite pathetic as no one usually bothers with us and then all of a sudden we have all these "friends" getting in contact asking how we are, is there anything they can do for us etc. I'm finding it very annoying and stressful and wish they would just leave us alone!
As for getting df'd if you had read my posts correctly I really dont see how it can make much difference to me, my family or my life right now. I will never change my mind now I know what I know so will never want to go back...... EVER!
As for the MIL not speaking to me anymore surely that can only be a bonus haha.
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Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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FeelingFree
Also I would say we have been fading the past year or so, but last month during "the greatest preaching campaign ever" we put in a report of 0 hours. We haven't been on the min for months possibly a year, I cant even remember but used to just put down an hour each for study with our child. Meeting attandance has been crappy for about 2 years on my part not going for weeks at a time. We didn't go to the convention in August as we were genuinely ill but haven't been to a meeting since and no social occasions. I cant stomach going to another meeting, assembly ever again. My husband has even stopped football! But it's really only the last week they have all come on strong with us, seeing how we are etc. Not sure MIL may have mentioned things to them. Also told MIL we wont be at the assembly this coming weekend as she asked what we were doing.
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Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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FeelingFree
Thanks AlwaysBusy and phizzy, I have no plans too but if it comes to it (not my doing but others) I guess I dont get much choice in the matter! Sorry to be nosey but why do you recommend not getting df'd? Is it family reason's, not playing into their hands? I know it will cause a fair bit of grief for us but the rest of my family dont go and one of my husbands brothers doesn't either so we wont be totally alone so to speak.
I have mentioned to one of my friends that we are no longer attending meetings and though she was very nice and lovely she immeadiatly said we couldn't have the same relationship we do now, so basically we cant be friends but she wont ignore me because I haven't acutally done anything to warrent that....yet! I'm not sure where that leave's us on the relationship scale really anyway! I was expecting it of course but thought it was quite brutal and to be honest if everyone is going to be like that I dont see what difference it would make to me if we did get df'd?
How do you avoid elders? Just not answer the door if they come round or can you actually tell them you dont want to see them?
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The Blatant SEXISM of Watchtower!
by Island Man infrom my yahoo answers question here: .
"the bible says of deborah: "now deborah, a prophetess, the wife of lappidoth, was judging israel at that time.
5 she used to sit under the palm tree of deborah between ramah and bethel in the hill country of ephraim; and the sons of israel came up to her for judgment.
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FeelingFree
Argh! It makes me MAD!
You have to remember that women have significantly smaller brains than a man, according to bro Heard of the GB. Never could they do the job of a man.......
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Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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FeelingFree
Ok so... when I was talking to my MIL about why I no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that I needed to speak to the elders. I said from the word go I didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it. I also said if the elders knew all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and I would get disfellowshipped. Her reaction to this was that I was very judgmental and of course they wouldn't think that at all! I however feel differently after having been shown some experience's by my husband of similar situations.
I went to see my dad who has been "re-activated" the past few years after several years of just not going. I told him the same thing and he thought I was being silly and they would never do that.
Lately the elders have been umm... "very caring" and we are being a bit love bombed by everyone. However still haven't spoken to anyone about what's actually going on and really have no plans too, as I said before nothing can change our minds now we know what we know. Which is something I think people fail to understand, it's like my brain has been totally rewired and I don't think I could go back even if I wanted to.
Now the thing is an elder just happened to "pop" round yesterday (also he phoned in the week such love) anyway I just let my husband deal with it as I was the one who had to deal with the phone call. On both occasion's he spoke about coming round and doing a shepherding call (we only had one 3 months ago and pretended everything was fine). As it stands I see no reason to talk to them and we will decline their offer.
However I in a sick way am interested in knowing what would happen if I did tell them exactly how I felt. Also if they did disfellowship me/us I wonder how that would affect my MIL and dad especially as they are adamant it wouldn't happen. Maybe it would show them that things aren't how they seem in the org or maybe it would just do nothing and they would just go along with it all and shun us (though I'm 99% sure my dad wont and I know that MIL was chatting with her friends disfellowshiped sons when she went to visit the family).
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JW's and depression
by FeelingFree ini was wondering how many of you suffered badly with depression when you were in "the truth" and if you feel your depression was related to being part of the organisation?
are you better now you have left or still have issue's?
whatever your experience's i would be very intrested to know (if you feel you can talk about it.).
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FeelingFree
Darth Fader- I had forgotten about all these weird illnesess JW's suffer from and your right it is in the majority, women who suffer with them. I had never heard of fibromyalgia until one of my friends said she had been diagnosed with it. Still dont quite get what it is either! It almost seems to me that the people who have these illnesses wallow in it and sort of enjoy having an illness and have no interest in getting better. I sound so judgmental but this is just what I have observed from several people. Also seem to really love telling people they have them and the simpathy it elicits. I wonder if its some way of wrestling back some control over a aspect of their life and themselves?
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Apple Cider Vinegar
by poppers ini've been drinking 1 tbs with a glass of water twice daily for digestion for about 3 weeks now.
i've found it helps, but it also acts as an appetite suppressant; i've lost several pounds since using it.
i'm consuming fewer calories because i'm just not as hungry as before.
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FeelingFree
I have acid reflux a lot, much worse when I'm stressed like right now but am also pregnant so it's extra bad. Will try anything! Thanks for the tips :)