Posts by Alive!

For a while, after stopping all meeting attendance and all JW activities it seemed like our lives (husband and self) were fragmenting and falling apart.

We simply were not coping with the trauma of not knowing who the hell we are anymore, what our lives mean outside of the Org, and reflecting on so much bad air about our lives as witnesses. The pressure we had put on eachother - or rather the pressure I had put on my husband as a WT wife, who was anxious to be perfect in the WT fashion. It all blew up. Years of repressed discomfort, dissonance and so much more.

Difficult to jolly along with other humans in a social way when you are confused and hurting internally.

The isolation was so painful, as was the realisation that we had partnered with a worldwide org that enforced Intellectual and spiritual subjection to the leaders who slipped and scuffled about 'truth' - whilst demonising those who dared to throw out honest questions, reasonable questions.

What a journey. For us, especially me - it was a battle to come to terms with myself. And it has clearly emerged that the radical shift caused a series of breakdowns for me.

Good folk here and in my daily life kindly strengthened me when I thought I was losing the plot - through PMs and forum posts - and together, my man and me - we're finding our balance.

I was talking to an athiest relative and explained to her, that for me, I cannot ignore my inner sense that there is 'something' driving this world, universe - I really believe we are all 'made in the image of God' but we are broken versions. That Christ, truly lived on this earth and truly come from 'above' - from another world, place, dimension.

And all creation will one day be reconciled.

I'm not meaning to preach - just I can't explain my position without explaining my current spiritual position... If that makes sense. Even if that position appears to be a delusion :-)

Our lives are taking shape. The fear of failure (whatever that is) has evaporated. The anxiety and depression has left.

Gradually our lives are filling up again.

I have made several new friends, over the past two to three years in real life who are proving to be 'stickers' - it takes time.

We are not beset by 'bad things' - or at least, not overcome by them - and there have been some tricky things to manage in the past couple of years.

Lose the superstitious fear that the WT culture encourages. It's all a lie.

There is hope. As folk said to me - one day at at a time.

34

Reflecting on my Disfellowshipping

by kairos in

jw
friends

today is the day.. i was baptized as one of jehovah's witnesses on march 25th 1989.disfellowshipped for admitted apostasy today, september 10th 2015.. what an amazing story we all share.

how did we get involved with this group and think this was the best way of life?.

i asked my wife to stay home from the meeting tonight and spend the evening with me.she is.... we celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary this past monday.. i must admit, i never saw any of this coming, but it couldn't have come sooner.i'm free of all the fake friendships.

Alive!

Keep your head up.

Your conscience was hurt by the lies - you couldn't continue in that way.

Your sensibilities were offended by the 'spiritual cage' that is the corporate structure of the JW.org brand.

The people in that sad congregation who listened to the announcement are trapped - they put their trust in a religion which at one point was led by a man who declared that the patriarchs would be resurrected in 1925, to live in an American purpose built mansion. They put their trust in a faith led on earth by men who in very recent times lie to courts and get caught out.

Jesus promised he would put the right words in the mouths of his 'followers' when they were forced to make judicial appearances in secular courts.

These leaders of JW.org are not the 'sort' Jesus asked us to trust in.....

This isn't a preaching post - but whether one 'believes' in Christ or not - it is clear, the JW.org is NOT the one and only true religion and it has no right to make that claim.

60

New light from GB member David Splane!

by Island Man in

in the latest jw broadcast splane is quoted as saying:.

"suppose there was a man who died 10 minutes before joseph was born.

would he be part of joseph's generation?

Alive!

Just watched the broadcast - the explanation of the chart... The 'for arguments sake' comment re the dates of the birth and death of Franz - why make that comment unless you want to plant that thought in the mind? This is a broadcast which reaches JWs globally - many hang on every word.

Dates, dates and more dates.

Truly, a searching Christian would have every right to question whether these men speak for God....I know my conclusion.

60

New light from GB member David Splane!

by Island Man in

in the latest jw broadcast splane is quoted as saying:.

"suppose there was a man who died 10 minutes before joseph was born.

would he be part of joseph's generation?

Alive!

Good grief.

43

Do you find it hard to be around active JW's now?

by EdenOne in

i do - actually, it's become close to unbearable.. and herein lies the paradox: i tried to fade in the illusion that i might keep contact with family and friends still "in".

was it worth it?

because not only most of them shun me anyways, but i find it almost unbearable to be around them, especially when the cult chit chat kicks in: every cute animal video clip triggers endless comments about glimpses of the future paradise and how "god did it"; those greasy praises to the organization and the governing body; the dumb awe about every jw broadcast and those cheesy music videos; the endless drivel against other religions when one knows perfectly well that we're no better than them; the endless flow of "experiences" of field service or spectacular conversions into "the truth"; the relentless congregation gossip; and so on .... i ask myself: is this why i am fading for ...?

Alive!

Just over three years ago I would not have believed that we (husband and self) would find ourselves in this place.

Like others here, I find the company and talk of some JWs torturous.

Why?

For us, It's the clear discernment of the lack of genuiness. The fake and Cult- like language. I never once believed with any shade of pleasure that the 'worldlies' were going to be destroyed - instead I believed that somehow they would all turn to God - and our 'seed planting' was crucial.

I hate that cult members cannot see themselves as the 'world' views them.

I'd challenge any to stop and ask a random dozen or so people in the street to explain Jehovahs kingdom and its purpose ...... Who would know? so much for 'warning' people.

I pointed out to a JW friend that at the helm of the FDS, people had been delivered false prophecy and manipulative literature which employed misquoting to support 'truths'

And we wonder why genuine people don't put their trust in the JW religion?

I want the company of genuine people who care.

Recent experiences have taught us that the inmates of JW are all about self protection.

We are starting to grow again - as a couple. As people. It's been harder than hard :-)

But, we believe it's going to be worth it.

16

A passing thought when driving past an inactive JWs place today.

by joe134cd in

i'm going to tell you of a family i knew of when growing up as a jw.

she was a solo mother who had 2 daughters and these 2 daughters were absolutely stunning both physically and personailty wise.

i remember thinking at the time how commendable it was that such beautiful looking women would choose to stay in the organisation.

Alive!

Thank you to Pete for writing with such thought and care.

Much to ponder on.

17

The "mis-truths" said by brothers during the Royal Commission.

by stuckinarut2 in

my sister said she heard several "mis truths" or dare we say, "lies" said by the brothers on the stand during the royal commission.. 1) vin toole lied when asked about the expression "theocratic warfare".

he said he was unaware of the term.

2) terry obrien lied when asked whether witnesses are free to research the organisation or free to leave without any negative consequences.. 3) geoff jackson lied when he said that the organisation doesn't run a 'police state' and doesn't criticise those who want to leave.

Alive!

Watching Geoffrey Jackson and other 'gifts in men' made me feel sick with shame.

They are so absorbed in a culture of twisting the truth, I doubt if they even realise exactly how they come across.

When Geoff Jackson avoided speaking the truth several times - I felt sick.

As for the one who said he wasn't aware of 'theocratic warfare' - I wonder what his God' thinks of that reply.

The dodging and ducking ....imagine behaving that way on a JC.

54

WHEN people leave a cult...MAN landed on the moon? Or critical thinking......

by The Rebel in

jw
friends

i believe anyone who has voluntarily left a cult has shown they can adapt to new solutions, and have used " critical thinking" skills otherwise most would not have left.. yet i believe a safe place for support is still needed and this safe place i believe is searched for.. now i may not measure up to much in ways of education, but for me personally " critical thinking skills" = " new" a " new" way of thinking, that takes time for me the individual to be visual and to contemplate.

and the more i read about " critical thinking," the more convinced i am that i can live with the ridicule of those that claim i do not possess it.

furthermore i would say those that criticise others " critical thinking skills," often luck the sensibility and thoughts to snore, spit, and fart....nor would they understand a room full of tobacco smoke and cheap booze...where " critical thinking " can often be found in its most profound, in the most sensitive poems and "pictures" that were ever drawn.

Alive!

Millie,

Would love to know you in real life.

What a journey this is.

Love reading you.

Cheers

'Alive'

69

Why Me?

by John Aquila in

do you ever wonder why out of all the witnesses, you are the one that woke up?

i wonder many times why me.

i know many men and women that are much, much better persons than me; either they are much smarter, more humble, kinder, more successful, or just better persons all around.

Alive!

I was always in the 'why me?' camp when I was a Witness.

Not born in.....the internal emotional turmoil was huge as I was 'studying'.

It took courage to 'join up' as I knew I'd be ridiculed by friends, family etc.

I believed that one day they'd see the truth too. I guess I should have listened to my inner concerns - the strange 'suit and tie' culture, no beards and how some of the witnesses had the most odd speech patterns and gestures ( I now recognise that as cult language)

I remember watching a husband and wife launch into an answer after I'd posed a question whilst studying - I retorted that they sounded like IBM salesmen.

A poster talked on this thread about the goodwill vibe, amateur people only desiring a wonderful new world - now we see a business corporation interested in stats and real estate.

Having seen the GB in the flesh via JW TV, my heart didn't lift up and I didn't feel compelled to say 'God is truly among you people'.

I actually felt sick. The slickness, false humility - if I can't trust my instincts, if I can't take note of the cold chill and hair raising on the back of my neck - what am I left with?

The killer for me is the boast 'we have the truth' - truth doesn't seek to deceive, deliberately misquote other humans, manipulate and coerce.