Posts by ToesUp

48

How many here gave up having a family for the sake of the "truth"?

by stuckinarut2 in

this is a sensitive topic for many of us i know, but i am wondering how many here actually gave up the idea of having a family "in this system" for the sake of "kingdom activity or service"??.

start the count here with my wife and i.

ToesUp

NVR2L8 "Today we have grand children and I could not imagine a life without my family and I am happy that I didn't obey the WT because every other times I did resulted in hardship down the line."

I agree...we couldn't imagine a life without our children. Hardships and all I wouldn't have done it any other way. It seems the older JW's are finding it hard. They are going through old age with no one to assist them and some are unable to cope financially, because they have been pioneering and in Bethel for so long. I believe a lot have built up resentment over the years. So sad.

48

How many here gave up having a family for the sake of the "truth"?

by stuckinarut2 in

this is a sensitive topic for many of us i know, but i am wondering how many here actually gave up the idea of having a family "in this system" for the sake of "kingdom activity or service"??.

start the count here with my wife and i.

ToesUp

We were terrible JW's.

Wanted kids...have them.

Bought a house.

Have jobs (we were not allowed a college education though).

Go on vacation.

Have a 401k. Yes...we are planning for the future.

My wife even has 2 piercings in each ear (OH MY!!)

No wonder we are out. We were terrible JW's !!! Yikes!

91

Setback

by EdenOne in

i saw this coming since my mother-in-law's funeral .... the congregation's "love-bombing" over my wife had its impact.

i watched her drawing closer and closer to her friends in the congregation.

then she decided she would attend the memorial.

ToesUp

Doc...you said it! "You're a JW so you're their friend. Easy. As long as you remain a good JW."

IMHO...who wants friends like that. Conditional friends are not the ones I want. We have made some great evil/worldly friends (lol) who seem to like our company. I like those friends better. There are some nice people out there you just gotta go out and find them.

91

Setback

by EdenOne in

i saw this coming since my mother-in-law's funeral .... the congregation's "love-bombing" over my wife had its impact.

i watched her drawing closer and closer to her friends in the congregation.

then she decided she would attend the memorial.

ToesUp

I agree with Blondie. It will die off eventually. We continued to associate with the JW's, giving them chance after chance. Different congregations, etc. The lack of love eventually shines through. The JW's will only go so far to help you. If you ask for physical help (anything where they may have to get off their a**) or hit them up for a couple of bucks, they will head for the hills. The only thing they will do is the JW head nod (act like they are listening and care) and tell you to trust/wait on Jehovah.

It may take some time but they WILL eventually let her down again. They just can't help themselves.

If you love her be kind and give it some time. In time...maybe she will see that you truly love her...unconditionally.

We are all here for you EdenOne.

91

Setback

by EdenOne in

i saw this coming since my mother-in-law's funeral .... the congregation's "love-bombing" over my wife had its impact.

i watched her drawing closer and closer to her friends in the congregation.

then she decided she would attend the memorial.

ToesUp

Wow...so sorry EdenOne.

This cult has a strong social pull. Nothing else. We have seen this before.

Just remember, if these "loving" people have let her down before, they WILL do it again.

Hang in there.

9

A form of healing?

by New day in

it has been mentioned on here by quite a few posters that when they let go of the pressure of living up to the standards set out in the wt publications, they felt relief from a strangulating set of rules and regulations which do not truly reflect the kindness and love displayed by jesus.. as more than a year has gone by since i first read the ray franz books and started reading posts here, i recently stepped back and thought about how i now feel.

having always been a boy who can't say no (theocratically speaking) i have just now realized that, yes, i can refuse talks in the tms if i either can't do them or (gasp) don't want to do them.

just last week a well-meaning but misguided elder put me down to take a fs arrangement without asking me, despite the fact that i resigned as an elder last year and had asked for the pressure to be taken off.

ToesUp

Good for you New Day! Just say NO!

These guys just want to "use" you. When they Brothers told me they wanted to "use" me and I needed to this or that, so they could "use me". When I thought about it, they had a whole other meaning for the word use. In reality they want to use me so they don't have to do it. I think most of the Elders hate the responsibilities and would love some down time. Except for the power hungry brown nosers who have too much time on their hands.

22

Candace Conti - Consequence for Elders

by The Searcher in

bodies of elders around the world will soon (tm) receive a nicely worded letter from the christian congregation of jehovah's witnesses, telling them that local elders are now responsible for ensuring that no perverts are allowed to be alone with any children on any kind of witness business, otherwise, the boe will be accountable to the courts - not the org!.

however, if the elders are aware that bro.

& sister oblivious sometimes ask bro.

ToesUp

I remember, as a kid, waiting for my Dad to come out of an Elders meeting. Sometimes past 11pm. Back in the old days, most families only drove 1 car & Mom stayed home with the kids. Now days...a different story. If you have kids in public school, they pile on the homework and projects. Meeting nights are a whole new story when you have kids in middle/high school. Very stressful on the kids.

I admire Elders who step down to spend more time with the family. You can't go back and do it over. You get 1 shot to raise your kids. Enjoy them!

You can tell the Elders who won't or can't step down. Take a look at their wives faces. They looked pissed.

22

Candace Conti - Consequence for Elders

by The Searcher in

bodies of elders around the world will soon (tm) receive a nicely worded letter from the christian congregation of jehovah's witnesses, telling them that local elders are now responsible for ensuring that no perverts are allowed to be alone with any children on any kind of witness business, otherwise, the boe will be accountable to the courts - not the org!.

however, if the elders are aware that bro.

& sister oblivious sometimes ask bro.

ToesUp

I wonder how many of the Current Elders feel the pressure of legal responsibility they will soon take on. I wouldn't want to be an Elder just for the legal ramifications.

Elders + pissed off JW's ='s law suits. Their "organization" won't be around to assist (just around to collect the donations). They will be long gone. Elders will be on their own.

What a "loving" organization, huh?

47

Apostasy Trial on YouTube - Undercover spycam part 1

by RayPublisher in

for only the second time in internet history, a video recording of a secret jehovah's witness apostasy trial has been published online on the jwstruggle youtube channel.

follow isaac's story here:.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se9rh6qux0o&feature=youtu.be.

ToesUp

Watching this really drives home how brainwashed these Elders/JW's are. For years we struggled with that nagging, "something just isn't right." Now we know what wasn't right.

So some of the Elders are "evidently/apparently/no doubt" imperfect. So I or family members should take all of our problems and deepest darkest secrets to these "trusted" imperfect men? Really?

I give Issac a lot of credit for doing this and I think he already knows the consequences. Once you let the cat out of the bag...it's an automatic DF'ing.

I wouldn't trust any of the guys to flush my dead goldfish down the commode, much less make any decisions regarding me or my family.

48

Struggling

by Alive! in

i read here regularly and although i haven't joined in, i really appreciate all the wonderful contributions from those who are willing to share their experiences.... .

i was a convert.

i won't go into the whole history ( perhaps another day) - my story could easily be recognised in the small town where i live, with my husband.. so, we stopped going to the meetings around a period of time when we were going through severe emotional difficulties - at that point, we needed unconditional family love - the hectic, forced jw dinner parties and social occasions gave no real comfort.

ToesUp

Welcome Alive!

I agree with FayeDunaway. Start enjoying your life. We have experienced similar things from our supposed friends and family. We finally had to come to the realization that these are are NOT our friends. Friends don't do those things to each other. It's one of the hardest realizations to come to grips with but once I (we) did it, I (we) have moved on. We feel so much better and are happy. Truly happy!