maksutov

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Posts by maksutov

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  47

  What are you up to this summer?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i really enjoy hearing about other people's lives.

  feeling a little lonely this evening so please tell me if you have plans for the summer months.

  i may go to some outdoor theatre with my daughter who's home from uni; with a picnic and a bottle of wine.

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  maksutov

  Fossil hunting! :D
  
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  13

  JWism retaking control of wife's family

  by The JHWH in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  a situation regarding this religion has developed which i fear might have negative implications on me and wifes lives, and i'm looking for thoughts and advice in how to approach the situation.

  i'll start with some background information to enlighten the situation.. i'm a male in mid-twenties, raised secularly, married to an ex-jw woman (on paper still a jw though), who's been raised in the jw religion, although somewhat untheocratically shall i say.

  for instance her mother has 5 children with 3 different men, all non-jws, and has had many other relationships as well.

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  maksutov

  It sounds like you are expecting people to behave rationally. Some people do quite well at that, but a lot don't. I'm in a somewhat similar situation - my never-been-a-JW father-in-law is studying with the JWs and progressing towards baptism, even after I gave him a book (that I wrote) spilling the beans on TTATT, and doing his own research online. My brother, who has previously commented that it is a cult, is quite bitter about the way he was harshly disciplined as a child by our JW parents, and is very well aware that the religion makes no sense is also now studying with JWs. My ex sister-in-law vacillates between believing it and not believing it, and again, I have spilled the beans with her. My wife knows enough to know that it is not true, but she still believes.

  What all these people have in common is that they are not critical thinkers, and are instead reacting to needs and desires that are being fulfilled by what the JWs have to offer. A sense of community, a way to avoid confronting ones own mortality, a purpose in life, instant friends, an authority to tell them what to think and do. Whether it is true or not is not especially relevant - what is "true" today might not be "true" tomorrow anyway. It is sad, and frustrating, but I don't think there is much we can do about it. You can't force someone to think critically.
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  45

  New Thought About Active J.W.'s

  by The Searcher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  from my own observations & conversations with selected active j.w.

  's, here are my conclusions:.

  's are very rapidly falling into two distinct camps -.

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  maksutov

  I don't speak to many JWs any more, but two I have spoken to have both said that they are taking a more 'relaxed' view than they used to - they are fed up with beating themselves up, and are just doing what they feel they reasonably can. One of them said that they enjoy the good bits but take the judgmental stuff with a pinch of salt. These two are both completely convinced that it is the one true religion though, and defend it to the hilt. Not sure which group they would fit in!
  
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  15

  Just how is JW org doing?

  by Half banana in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i started posting on the ex community about five years ago since two of my children have remained under the jw spell.

  back then i had little tangible hope of seeing the downfall of the org.

  i now see evidence of big cracks forming in their hermetic carapace..

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  maksutov

  The org has a certain inertia and is also very adaptable. The worldwide web has been around for 25 years now, and has made a dent in the membership, but not a crippling one. It is true that the internet makes it easier to leave than it used to be, and easier for potential new recruits to find out TTATT, but JWs give birth to more JWs - even if only one third of them stay in, that still keeps the machine running.

  The loss of revenue from printing took a blow when they had to stop charging for literature. Since then, printing won't have been as profitable - by going paperless they can save money. The rank and file can now be asked to donate the money that they were using for literature to KH building projects. This not only keeps the money coming in, it also serves as an investment - unlike literature which just gets thrown away, the society can keep the buildings and later on consolidate/downsize/liquidise as needed (maybe even hiring out halls would be a future option).

  Ever since I left, there have always been some ex-JWs who have speculated that the org is about to crumble, but I don't see any convincing evidence of that. I think it will either die out or go more mainstream eventually, but it will be a long drawn out process, and I don't expect it to seriously dwindle in the near future.
  
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  76

  OMG, I’m gonna get Old and Die.

  by John Aquila in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  when it finally clicked,.

  and you realized there was no 1914, there was no generation that would see the end of a wicked system, there was no paradise around the corner, .

  what went through you mind?.

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  maksutov

  I think I suspected all along that it was just a pipe dream, so it really only took me a few days to get over the initial adjustment. I felt that I would rather live and die with a free mind, knowing that this is all there is than waste the precious years remaining hoping for something "better". Either way we're all gonna die - better to know what you are up against so you can prioritise your life.
  

  Having said that, although I have adjusted, I don't think I have really fully come to terms with my own mortality, and it still causes some anguish from time to time.
  
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  5

  Amizades

  by OportoGirl in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  boa tarde, sera que existem membros no forum que pertencam a congregacoes em portugal?

  procuro novas amizades, edificantes e verdadeiras.

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  maksutov

  Boa tarde! Sou Inglês, mas talvez a única coisa boa que veio do meu tempo com as TJs é que aprendi falar português (mais ou menos). Infelizmente porém, acho que este fórum não vai ser muito útil para falar com outros portugueses. No entanto, bem vindo!
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  44

  The JW religion has just cost me my marriage & my family life

  by jambon1 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after leaving the organisation 10 years ago i fought with everything i had to stay in my marriage and with my three children.

  after a tumultuous number of years trying to maintain a happy family life while living in a divided home, it's finally over.

  the religion is single handedly responsible for destroying my marriage and my family.

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  maksutov

  Very sad. It is tragic what this religion does to families.
  
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  14

  What did you think when you visit the museum as a JW.

  by James Mixon in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  when you stood there in front of that dinosaur display did you connect the.

  dots, or did you like me believe that they made a mistake in calculating their.

  ages.

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  maksutov

  What did I think? To my chagrin, I did not think. I let the Watchtower do that for me.
  
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  24

  New Light! People CAN now be saved AFTER the Tribulation begins!

  by FusionTheism in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  for decades, i remember the society, publications, and elders saying that once the great tribulation begins, it is too late to repent or be saved.

  they said the "door of the ark will have been closed.".

  now, however, look at the brand-new clarified understanding / new light on this from jw.org, below.. they are still saying that the majority of worldly people will not be saved, but they are now saying it is possible.. the simplified july study watchtower says this:.

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  maksutov

  In other words...

  Your son/daughter/mother/father/other relative/friend who knows the JW religion is BS might still convert at the last minute, but don't count on it, and don't leave, cos if you do, there is a 99.9% chance you will be dead meat. Have a hope that those who have left or never joined are not beyond redemption, but not so much hope that you can slacken off. Just enough hope that you'll carry on regardless.
  
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  24

  JWs through the eyes of an eight year old

  by maksutov in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my wife is a jw, and is teaching our eight year old daughter jw beliefs.

  i am trying to teach her about evolution and critical thinking skills.

  here is a conversation we had today (as best i can remember it):daughter: "why do bad things happen?

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  maksutov

  Thank you for the continued comments and suggestions, I really appreciate it. On Saturday, while my wife was out (on a KH build project), I showed my daughter the video suggested by cappytan. She watched the whole thing, seemingly with interest (I was half expecting her to get bored and start complaining, but she didn't), but had no questions or comments to make afterwards. I didn't want to press her, so just let it go and moved on. I am working hard at keeping our relationship fun and loving, and that is going very well - we are very close.
  

  We did also have an interesting discussion about shunning (my dad and in-laws are now shunning me) - she really sees it as unfair, for now at least. She was shocked to learn that I would not be shunned if I had not been baptised, and that some children even younger than her were being encouraged to get baptised. She offered the opinion that it was silly to expect a young child to know what religion they want to be in for the rest of their life. She is still very keen to be a JW when she grows up, but I think a little bit of the fire has been dampened down, and I hope it all makes her a bit more circumspect - she has reiterated that she won't shun me.