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jsnsswtgrl

Joined

My mother began attending meetings when I was 4 or 5, so I was raised as a JW. My father never became a believer but the family remained together (at least until I was 16 or so.) Of course, our relatives and the people in the community thought we were very strange, so social isolation became part of our lives. Unfortunately, since my father was not a JW, we never fit in with the others in the congregation either. We recieved minimal support and maximum scrutiny within the congregation. After years of struggling to meet all her family, work, and "Christian" obligations, my mother developed a mental illness (major depression with pscychotic features) and left my father to move in with a man. All of you can imagine how this development wrecked my entire social structure. The elders wanted me to agree to not see my mother (I was 16). I refused to add to my mother's exteme sadness and confusion by shunning her. I became "bad association". What they asked me to do was the most unloving thing that I could have done. Doesn't the Bible say that we'll know the true religion by the love they have among each other? Their asking me to turn my back on my mother was what made up my mind to go to college and break ties with the congregation. It's been 10 years and I still have issues with guilt, fear, and trust. However, I am beginning to be able to look at Jehovah as a loving, forgiving God who wants us to be happy now and in the future. I feel like after thousands of hours of sitting with a congegation and of studying the Bible, I was not taught what being a Christian was about. Things are pretty good now. I finished college, have a good job, and am working on my Master's degree. I no longer rely on antidepressents to stay alive. I have a great boyfriend who is a part-time minister (I still haven't broke that to my mother) at a wonderful church. My father and mother are together again (for now). My mother is no longer sick (but I know if she started attending meetings again, it would only be a matter of time). My brother is married to a sweet girl (not a JW), and they have a sweet 4 month-old baby girl (not being raised as a JW).