Posts by Incognito

Although Squarespace is often thought to be a blogging site only, they are capable and open to hosting any type of website. They do have many templates available for those less technically proficient or an existing site may be transfered over as is.

Squarespace I understand, is very scalable on-the-fly so that it's virtually impossible to overload their servers from too much traffic.

16

Being A JW Is FUN!!

by Pig in

some people think that it must be miserable to be a jw because they dont celebrate christmas or birthdays.. but they're wrong!

being a jw is miserable because you cant do fucking anything.. crazy hair day - this was a fundraising day where kids come to school with blue or red died hair and give a $2 donation.

i wasnt allowed to do this because it was too worldly to have "crazy hair" and it would be too hard to wash it out for tomorrow nights meeting.. school camp - this was unnessisary association with those devil worshipping 9 year olds.

Incognito

Pig said:

If you're lucky...

You're not supposed to use that expression either. Please meet with the Elders in the back room.

I dont know if witnesses still do this but i wasnt allowed to do Health Class in grade 5 and 6.

This is not practiced everywhere. My parents (uber JWs always afraid of doing something 'not right') had no problems with health education in school and I've never heard or seen other JW's have a problem with it either. I suppose that by having their children learn Sex Ed at school, this is one subject that they didn't need to discuss with their kids.

Many current JWs are afraid to do anything that places them around 'worldlies' for any more than what is required .

At my wife's place of business, there are ~200 employees including one JW woman. Not only does this JW woman stay home on dress-up days (ie: Halloween costumes permitted for those that want to dress-up), but she won't even attend any shared lunch day (some call it 'Pot Luck') or an Employee Appreciation lunch provided on any date by the company.

39

Need advice about JW boyfriend

by tryingtolove in

i have been with my jw boyfriend for about a year and a half.

he was living with his parents when we first started dating, but now we are living together.

his mother knows, but not his father (who is the one who got them into the jw's and is more strict about it).

Incognito

Trying,

Welcome to the forum. I'm glad to see that you've recognized current problems and can foresee additional problems over the long term. Too bad you didn't ask these questions earlier, before investing 1.5 years in this relationship.

From your initial post, I determine that you don't really know much about JWs or the Watchtower organization. This group is not equivalent to any other religion but is highly controlled and very dictatorial, some say CULT. Ideas and beliefs presented, are not items that members may wish to adopt, but are required beliefs that must be adopted by all JWs, without question or consideration.

Member's minds are conditioned that the WT is God's true organization on earth and that JWs are God's special, chosen people, believing that they are the only group that will survive Armagedon, contrary to what they may tell a non-believer to their face.

You'll probably recognize that it's easiest to teach a person as a child and that what is taught to a child will remain with them and is the hardest to change. Since your BF was raised as a JW, what he was then taught will always be with him.

JW's SHUNNING family members because they no longer practice being a JW is a requirement dictated by the Watchtower for every JW. It is not an option and something only a few extreme JW's do on their own.

By 'pretending' that his son is not living unmarried, with a non believing woman, is a means of the Father not having to shun his son as he doesn't 'technically' have proof of his living arrangement. Once the living arrangement has been confirmed, he will then be required to shun his son and you.

Your boyfriend is fooling himself into thinking that he can live whatever way he wants and still maintain a healthy relationship with his Father. Acceptance by his Father is not your BF's decision otherwise, to be accepted, he must be a fully practicing JW, following every requirement as defined by the WT. Anything less will not be enough and will likely result in shunning by his Father if not his entire JW family.

For YOU to be accepted by his JW Family, you too must be a fully dedicated and practicing JW. Do you have any idea of what is involved? Do you know how many requirements are contradictory to the bible and how much unquestioning allegience must be shown to the Watchtower organization? If you didn't wish to become a JW, would your BF hold it against you for any breakdown in his relationship with his parents? Are you prepared for that?

Do you realize that if you and he had children, if your child was ever injured, as a JW, you would be required to fight against administering a blood transfusion even when the Doctor's determine that this treatment is required to save your child's life?

I have seen many occasions where people raised as JWs, even after not being active members for many years, hold onto the notion that JWs are the 'True' religion and will suddenly return to it. Often the catalyst will be a major event in their life such as birth of a child, loss of a loved one, illness or even marriage. Quite often, they will become extreme in their devotion and place many unreasonable conditions on the relationship with their partner.

For your BF to become a partner that you can rely upon over the long term, he must first come to terms with recognizing that the Watchtower and the JW religion is not the 'Truth' or God's chosen organization. Not practicing and promising he'll never return to being a JW is not enough. Until he is ready to look into this issue, he will likely defend the religion, organization and current teachings, even if he's not practicing. Unless he comes to terms with reality, this issue will always be in his background and mind and can surface at any time, current or future.

JWs are conditioned to believe that God comes first before their marriage partner. Since the WT holds itself as God's true and only organization, they place themselves as God's spokesman on earth. Whatever they say is coming from God will come first and your relationship with him will always be secondary. Since the WT promotes that men are the head of household and women are 'the weaker vessel', you will likely never be an equal partner.

Although no one can predict that your relationship will not work out, unless your BF is ready to deal with and acknowledge the 'falseness' of the organization and religion and knowingly put it behind him, any long term relationship with you will be made more difficult and trying for both of you and may be doomed from the start. Unfortunately, dealing with and accepting the falseness of the religion often has a high cost, usually a breakdown in the relationship with believing family members.

Bluntness of comments made on this forum, is an expression of concern for you as no one desires to see you hurt or involved with a relationship made difficult if not impossible due to religious programing.

I believe everyone here wishes you and your BF well and that you and he can work through this in an informed manner.

You may want to read through the 'Best Of Topics' section of this forum as situations similar to yours have been previously addressed. Ask any other questions you wish.

19

crying at my grandma's house

by lil.lady.03 in

i don't know why i'm telling you all this, but i broke down in tears today.. .

i went to my grandma and grandpa's today just to visit.. most of my early memories are being with my grandma out in service while my mom was off to work.. .

i looked at her today.

Incognito

Lil,

Good advice by AudeSapere.

After 50 years as an active JW, there is too much for her to loose in changing her belief system.

I think your emotional reaction stems from seeing that this 'religion' is not 'The Truth' yet your Grandma cannot see this herself. You love her and feel frustrated that although she has given so much of herself and has done so much already, she feels guilty about no longer being able to keep-up the pace and is beating herself up emotionally and is wearing herself down physically trying to do more.

The W/T is all about: 'never mind what you did yesterday, what have you done today?'

Always 'Do More!' - Never 'Great Job'.

61

FlyingHighNow's Nephew's shunning - tragic ending

by Incognito in

jw
friends

flyinghighnow (heather) updated her thread last evening about her nephew's shunning treatment by his own mother.

this story has now taken a tragic turn and because heather had updated the original thread, it has been buried and has not gotten the recognition it deserves.. the third page of the original thread is here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/196991/3/my-lovely-jw-sister-just-said-this-to-her-oldest-son last evenings post is about half way down.. .

please provide heather some kindness and support that she needs at this time.. .

Incognito

FlyingHighnow (Heather) updated her thread last evening about her Nephew's shunning treatment by his own mother. This story has now taken a tragic turn and because Heather had updated the original thread, it has been buried and has not gotten the recognition it deserves.

The third page of the original thread is here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/196991/3/My-lovely-JW-sister-just-said-this-to-her-oldest-son Last evenings post is about half way down.

Please provide Heather some kindness and support that she needs at this time.

Incog

73

Alot has Changed and I'm going BACK

by Butterflyleia85 in

jw
friends

i bet people has forgotten me but thats ok because i know they have helped me a lot on here.. .

anyways i think the last time i been on here i mentioned my jw sister not going to my wedding.

for those that do remember my story, the wedding was beautiful on the beach in key west, fl!

Incognito

I just hope this situation will not be comparable to an Alcoholic that has been on the wagon for some time, taking the attitude that they can now handle a drink every now and then.

JWism like alcoholism, it's all or nothing!

JWism like alcoholism, has an effect one way or the other, on your relationship with everyone you hold near and dear.

Butterfly,

I hope that things do go well for you. Why though, do you want to be accepted by people, relatives or not, that will not accept you for who you truly are but will only accept someone a faceless corporation dictates you to be? Had you made the decision to not go back to the JWs, would your love and acceptance of these same people be conditional that they stop being JWs?

As already stated, whatever you do as a JW is never good enough. Whatever bar you need to jump over to become accepted, will be raised once you are able to consistently jump over it, otherwise, you aren't doing enough. You can't make a decision that you'll do this but not that. It's all or nothing! Since you're already disfellowshipped, you'll need to go above and beyond to make-up for your past.

As far as your family living a distance from you, I have relations (probably of equivalent relationships to the relations you're trying to accepted by) that live 300 miles away, but will have little to do with me and my family as we have done nothing more than stop attending meetings. We have been discarded even though when we had been speaking with them, we never mentioned anything negative against the W/T, JWs or said anything about not attending.

JWs live in their own small world and although it is supposedly wrong to gossip about others, there is little enjoyment JWs have in life but to talk about everyone else. Anywhere you go, there are always JWs who know someone, who know someone else in whatever congregation you have relatives in, and they are quick to talk about you and just as quick to relay the last time they saw you at a meeting.

If you are again accepted, general conversation with JW relatives will often result in discussions about assemblies, field service or other JW activities. Sometimes little questions are asked that seem to be of little significance, but your response and visual reaction will often make them suspicious and give them reason to question your status within the organization. If they are suspicious of your status, they will often discuss this with others and not directly with you.

If you're planning on fading, the relatives you're now trying to please, will probably soon find-out and discard you again. There is no honourable escape from this group.

4

1914 - 2012 What Russell Actually Expected in 1914

by Clint Bussey in

you can check out this video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-rhg80oina.

Incognito

Hi Clint

When you're at the youtube page you want to embed, copy the browser address from the browser address bar, and paste that into your post. If it doesn't post as an active link, try posting the address to a new line and hit enter with the cursor just after the pasted address link and the link will usually become active. There is also a link button (looks like a chain) in the top line of this sites editing tools (just above where you type-in your post)

Here is your link pasted to a new line.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-rHG80OiNA

10

Six Screens of the Watchtower Site??

by Incognito in

jw
friends

does anyone know what's going on there?

it's been unavailable for many days.. rick and inez occasionally post here an i know that mouthy and others here often call-in to the conference calls.. i usually review the conference call archives for topics of interest but the archives had not been updated in a while.

now the entire site seems to be off-line.. i tried looking through the previous weeks topics on jwn but i didn't see anything related to the six screens site..

Incognito

Does anyone know what's going on there? It's been unavailable for many days.

Rick and Inez occasionally post here an I know that Mouthy and others here often call-in to the Conference Calls.

I usually review the Conference Call archives for topics of interest but the archives had not been updated in a while. Now the entire site seems to be off-line.

I tried looking through the previous weeks topics on JWN but I didn't see anything related to the Six Screens site.

30

Look what mommy brought home :)

by troubled mind in

jw
friends

.

Incognito

Cute kitty!

Dogs are pack animals and so the dog has to re-assess his position within the pack as I'm sure the cat is occupying a great deal of your time, time that would usually be spent on him.

troubled mind said:

I wasn't going to get another cat because of my husbands allergies ......but this kittens fur is so short and dense I think it maybe different

Most people think that allergies are caused by the fur itself. Although some people can react to fur, many are allergic to proteins in the animal's saliva.

Cats and dogs clean themselves by licking. This saliva dries on the fur whereby the protein particles can become airborne and inhaled by people when the animal moves or is petted.

See if your husband reacts when the cat licks him. Some people get a rash or hives within a few minutes.