Yeah, I understand that it is awkward. In the other thread someone mentioned an elder speaking angrily with a DF'ed person for getting there 10 minutes early. That's ridiculous. I understand that it may be awkward for the DF'ed person, but for some it may be more awkward to hide out until the meeting starts or time things to get there at the last second just so nobody has to see their shame.
dubstepped
JoinedPosts by dubstepped
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18
DF'ed arrival/departure times at meetings
by dubstepped ini didn't want to derail another thread, but something said made me wonder.
i know that i noticed df'ed people come in right when the meeting started and leave right when it left most of the time.
is that some sort of actual rule?
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18
DF'ed arrival/departure times at meetings
by dubstepped ini didn't want to derail another thread, but something said made me wonder.
i know that i noticed df'ed people come in right when the meeting started and leave right when it left most of the time.
is that some sort of actual rule?
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dubstepped
I didn't want to derail another thread, but something said made me wonder. I know that I noticed DF'ed people come in right when the meeting started and leave right when it left most of the time. Is that some sort of actual rule? Is that written somewhere that "thou shalt not make people uncomfortable with your presence"? "Thou shall arriveth at the birth of the meeting and leaveth at its end"? Does someone keep a stopwatch on these poor people? It's such a sickening way to treat people overall, but telling people how long they can sit in the auditorium because they're basically lepers now seems to add another layer of awful to it.
I'm DA'd, and have NO desire to ever set foot in a KH again, but part of me hears something like that and wants to just go sit right in the middle of everyone the whole time, walk up to people to talk, and make them all as uncomfortable as humanly possible. It's so ridiculous and the assholery knows no bounds with them, I just want to let them experience it from the other side.
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I have too much crap!! How to declutter/dehoard.....
by Muddy Waters insome areas of our home are very nice, tidy, clean.
and other rooms are just junk and clutter and clothes and papers.... omg.
and now that we are getting older, we realize that we face a time of transition -- and this is hard to cope with too, as we believed the lie that we would never get old, etc.
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dubstepped
I rented a dumpster once and threw most of it all away. I gave away some nicer stuff on Craigslist for free and tossed the rest. The key afterward is to adopt a minimalist view of material things. It is tough. We made a lot of progress, but we still have a way to go. I said for years that I'd sell the stuff and never did, so I just gave it away. Recognize that a lot of reasons are just excuses in this area of life. Hope that helps. -
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If all the world were JWs....
by Tornintwo inin my former indoctrinated state, i used to yearn for a time when all the world would be jws.
but hang on minute, let's just think about what the world would be like if everyone was a jw,.
first of all, no higher education, so no medical advances, no scientific research, no modern day medicine, infectious disease rife, no doctors, no engineers, so no modern day comforts.
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dubstepped
It would be one of the dumbest societies in history. No discoveries would be made. Home-schooled people that passed courses a monkey could ace would rule the world.
There wouldn't be the harmony among people that they preach. Instead there would be cliques and backbiting as people tried to gain prominence just like in most congregations.
People would die without doctors, though they'd have plenty of quackery to practice. Supplements and weird contraptions from Radio Shack would convince us that we'd be healed from various cancers.
Without any preaching to do people would have no way to prove their worth. Depression would be even worse among the ranks as these people have nothing else in their miserable lives to bring them joy.
Pedophilia would run rampant as there would be no governmental authorities to try to make the organization take it seriously.
Sounds fun! Where do I sign up?
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Watching from the outside - and a question at the end if TL;DR
by unfamiliar ini grew up in a jw family.
i was the youngest, and i never really felt like my questions were answered in a satisfying way, so i kind of gradually faded and i was thankfully never baptized (hooray for me).
i kept going to family study time until i was about 27 (!
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dubstepped
Where have you been, lol. When I was a kid in the 80's I wasn't supposed to get old enough to drive, graduate, get married, certainly not approach 40. Armageddon is always tomorrow for them and they can't wait for billions to die so long as they get to pet pandas one day earlier. -
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dubstepped
Why does it have to be white bread for? Where's my ryes and pumpernickels at? Lol. And I love garlic bread. That was the dumbest illustration ever on so many levels. The "poison" actually saturated less than the mud he used and could also have been cut away. They just make stuff up and see how stupid people are. They must take bets behind the scenes on what they can get away with. -
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Hey Everyone! Recently "DA'd!"
by jacobm ini just "da'd" friday.
i've been posting on here for years but do to anonymity, i had to start with a new account.
would love to connect with anyone that i may know.
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dubstepped
Welcome to the land of disassociation! My wife and I DA'd in September. It is so freeing not to have to play their games anymore and to get a fresh start. It felt amazing for us to take a stand too. We took one to get in that mess, and it was great to take one while leaving. Good for you! -
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First Born Syndrom? -
by elderINewton inis it just me or does it seem like a large portion of first born children leave the "truth" or find ttatt?
its weird for me, but of all the other people out i know (only about 20 ish) they are all first borns, and usually the wife is as well.
just looking at this from a different lens and curious if others see the same.
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dubstepped
My wife and I were both the firstborn in our respective families, and we both left and disassociated together. -
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What Should the Minimum Wage Be (USA)?
by Village Idiot induring the gop debates donald trump said that american’s “wages [are] too high” and later said “that having a low minimum wage is not a bad thing for this country” (7:25)..
do you agree and if so why?.
my two cents on this issue; do the math.
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dubstepped
I'm late to this part and certainly no expert on the subject. Feel free to correct me where I'm wrong or answer any questions I pose.
First, why should someone be able to live independently on minimum wage? It seems that now people expect to be able to raise a family on that. Why? Also, the wage is then multiplied by 40 hours. Why 40? Who says that is an acceptable amount of time to work?
Could it be that if minimum wage jobs are all you qualify for, maybe you shouldn't plan to have kids or a spouse that doesn't also work? If you do, should you maybe then have to work more to pay for your life? Should you maybe have to work on increasing your skills and becoming more valuable in the marketplace?
I grew up poor to the point where if it wasn't for the kindness of people at the KH at times we wouldn't have really had food. Why? My dad wasn't exactly a go-getter and my mom didn't work. My dad would turn down overtime and seemed to just want to work as little as possible. He hated his job, and I get that, but we all suffered. Had he worked more, had my mom worked, had they spent time bettering themselves, maybe we wouldn't have been in that position.
I'm no college grad, but I have always been willing to work as much as it took not to be in the financial position of my parents. My wife and I clean houses. We support ourselves well doing that, no higher education required. And you know what? We have a waiting list of families that want us to clean for them. Why? Because we not only do a good job but we're conscientious, hard working, honest people. Why don't we hire? Because finding people that want to be conscientious, hard working, honest workers is hard. We have a client that has a handyman business paying a very good wage that cannot find reliable help. In fact, many people that he hires have stolen from him.
I do think that minimum wage matters. But nothing works if people aren't willing to. Surely in some areas there is a dearth of work and minimum wage may be all that is there. In others there may be opportunities out there that nobody is bothering to reach for because they might have to work hard and not handed to them. I also wonder how much the government supporting people has discouraged people and made them lazy. Why bother working or even trying if you can survive without doing much of anything? I know many cleaning business owners that can't even get people to show up for interviews or just use them to put on unemployment records to act like they're trying to find work. So the minimum wage, at least to this guy who is admittedly not an expert on the subject, seems like only a small part of the overall problem.
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Honestly, Did Jehovah's Witnesses Do Anything POSITIVE For You?
by minimus ini was raised as a witness and am very thankful that i am out.
having said that, i think my upbringing produced positive qualities in me.
do you believe that anything positive came from your being a witness?
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dubstepped
I have a very addictive personality. I think that had I not been petrified of the results of even trying drugs and such I could have very well ended up strung out somewhere. I didn't allow myself to even be curious, and the arrogance programmed into me made me avoid certain things from my high horse. That actually probably was a protection for me. I probably could have gone off the rails on a few things but I had too much to lose. So there was at least an effective deterrent, for me. That's really about it for the positives. Most other qualities I have I would have had anyway. They did plenty of damage, but in this one small way I do think they saved me from myself. Of course, it was intense fear that did the saving, and that had its own horrible consequences in life.