Posts by dubstepped

27

My Pay No Attention to the Man Behind the Curtain Moment...

by HiddenPimo in

this is my first post.

i am physically in and mentally out.

well i will not be offering a tl/dr version as that would be too difficult and it would also be an oversimplification of how i got to see the man behind the curtain.. my story begins at the 2016 regional convention of jehovah's witnesses.

dubstepped

I couldn't leave quietly either. Disassociating was that immediate end game that both my wife and I wanted. I love hearing what woke you up, and how it touched off all of those other things that we all put up on the shelf until that one more thing happens that makes it all come crashing down. I recently interviewed someone that woke up because of the new songs and song book. Music was big for her and that was the feather that landed on her shelf and broke it loose.

Live your life man. Life free. Do you and be happy! Welcome to the forum!

25

Dating question from a bible student

by Biblestudent1 in

i have done bible study for about four months now.

the married couple who do it with me are lovely.

i have attended meetings for about two months.

dubstepped

JWs require chaperones for dating. JWs don't date outside of their kind per their interpretation of Biblical mandate. JWs only date for marriage.

More important than the dating angle, I must ask if you really know what you're going into. Yes, you study with a lovely couple. That lovely couple would let their child die refusing blood transfusions, would never let that child have friends outside the JW group to any real extent. That lovely JW couple would shun their child, family, friends, or each other if one ever left that faith.

Please realize that you are unknowingly dealing with what amounts to a "high control religion", a cult. We've all been there. We've all lost families. We've all realized that much of what we were taught were lies and propaganda.

Please, for your own sake, don't get wrapped up in the cult, nor a cult member. Your life will never be the same. Do your own research with an open mind.

Oh, and welcome! :)

26

Beroean Pickets- please offer encouragement

by Lightgrowsbrighter in

jw
friends

for many who have left jw.org, there is still a spiritual need and faith in the bible.

beroean pickets is one group/website where serious bible research and commentary, weekly critical reviews of wt studies, as well expose's of flawed wt opinion/doctrine- all backed by the bible- can be considered.

this vast amount of work and research is all done by just a small group of our volunteer brothers and sisters.

dubstepped

Most people don't know who Eric is. I know of him and read his stuff early on before becoming atheist but I seriously doubt this is going to cause waves of negative publicity or backfire on them big time. He's not thar important in the grand scheme of things, just like I'm not, neither are any of as activists. The people in the cult don't know or care who we are. 99.9%of the world outside doesn't care biut us particularly either. So I'm not sure how this is going to make much impact outside of Eric and those adjacent to him.

I'm glad he's done what he's done. It's helped people. Maybe there's someone that follows his work that this pushes over the edge to leave the cult. If so, great! But people run around acting like this or that minor thing is going to bring the Borg down. Not even close. They got away with 1975 and overlapping generations. This is nothing.

26

Beroean Pickets- please offer encouragement

by Lightgrowsbrighter in

jw
friends

for many who have left jw.org, there is still a spiritual need and faith in the bible.

beroean pickets is one group/website where serious bible research and commentary, weekly critical reviews of wt studies, as well expose's of flawed wt opinion/doctrine- all backed by the bible- can be considered.

this vast amount of work and research is all done by just a small group of our volunteer brothers and sisters.

dubstepped

How was he not disfellowshipped already? This shouldn't be a surprise. I'm sorry it's coming to this as it isn't pleasant, but it should be expected.

New Episode - 28 - Yolanda and Jehovah's Witnesses

by dubstepped in

episode twenty eight - yolanda and jehovah's witnesses.

i really had to think about how to describe this episode.

a word kept popping out at me and that’s “tough”.

dubstepped

Episode Twenty Eight - Yolanda and Jehovah's Witnesses

I really had to think about how to describe this episode. A word kept popping out at me and that’s “tough”. Yolanda faced verbal, emotional, physical, and sexual abuse inside the cult of Jehovah’s Witnesses, but she comes through with this tough and resilient spirit. Yolanda isn’t officially shunned and we’ve done things to protect her identity. She has become a haven for some shunned people in her local area.

Her story needs to be told because it’s indicative of a lot of what goes on behind closed doors inside the organization. They used to talk about a scripture that referred to whitewashed graves that looked nice but held dead men’s bones inside. There is so much in this story that is going on that will show you inside just another JW family, and you’ll see how some things like sexual abuse are perpetuated through the veil of secrecy in their hierarchy.

You can listen on the podcast app of your choice such as iTunes, Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Podbean, Podcast Republic (my personal choice), or many others.

You can also listen on my website at:

https://shunnedpodcast.com/episode-twenty-eight-yolanda-and-jehovahs-witnesses/

Or you can listen on Youtube at:

https://youtu.be/fIXScdDh9cM

25

I think I made up my mind

by paradiseseeker in

jw
friends

a month ago i travelled alone to italy for three days and i had the opportunity to visit the beautiful florence and re-visit many parts of rome.. but most importantly, i had the opportunity to stay alone and think about my situation and to make up my mind.. i've had very clear for almost 5 years that i will eventually leave the religion, but i couldn't decide when.. but now i know : i will leave on april 20th, the day after the memorial.. that day i will talk to my parents (this is by far the hardest thing to do) and soon afterwards i will talk to my closest friends, then i will send my disassociation letter.

i know that i will let them down, i will hurt them, most probably some of them will cry... but i need to live coherently for the first time in my life.

i'm sure that living in this contradiction is affecting and will affect my mental health and it's time for me to help myself instead of others.

dubstepped

My wife and I disassociated. It was the best thing we ever did. No more playing their games, never again will we have to have family pressuring us to go to meetings or elders popping up to visit. One day we were in, the next we were totally free.

Yes, the reality is that you'll lose your family. This is not a decision to be taken lightly. You cannot un-ring that bell. Once you put a bullet in the thing it is dead. But also, it is dead, and you can go live life. Most of our families are deeply toxic and honestly sometimes it's not bad to have that forced distance. If they get healthy we'll be happy to be there for them.

There's a stigma against disassociation by those that have never done it. I've done it, my wife did it, and I've helped others to as well, IF that's their choice. There's a certain something to living life in complete truth. We took a stand when we became JWs, and we took a stand when we left.

So whatever you do, do you. This is your life. Live it the way that you want, and you don't owe anyone anything.

20

Please help.... depressed jw teen

by huniepie in

i think i’m going insane.... i’m 17 years old and being raised in a jw household.

i really want friends and a boyfriend but i can’t have that because my parents are jw and i’m also homeschooled.

they are those jw parents that refuse to let me go to public school because of bad influences.

dubstepped

It's such a tough place to be in. Another poster here was in a similar situation. Her parents had kept her from other people by home schooling her. The difference with her is that she wasn't baptized. Her parents were really pushing her to as she was nearing 18. I don't know how it ended up with her. Regardless, ultimately you have to live your life and you can't take responsibility for their reactions. If the family is torn apart at some point because you go live your life then your family is putting themselves above your happiness and that's no family that you want to be a part of, even if it doesn't feel good at the time. Obviously we all want to have normal families. Most of us didn't.

For now I'd say that you should probably just keep playing the game while making an exit plan. Once you're 18 (in the US) your parents have no say. Do you have relatives somewhere that you could go live with and tell your story to? That may be enough to get you a new start. I think some look for student loans and try to go to college and stay on campus to get away, though I'm not a huge fan of debt. Still, it may be a way to get started in life.

Pioneering since you were nine is insane. Getting baptized at eight is insane. Your parents should see that know that's too much but they're cult victims too.

Obviously you want to go live a normal life, and you should get that chance. It will be up to you to make it happen. We can only give some advice. Aside from living another life, a normal one, please be sure you really look into and deconstruct the beliefs that you've been pumped full of. If you don't they can come back up later and sabotage your efforts.

I'm so sorry that you had to live that life. My heart aches every time I see a kid out in field service because I know what they're up against.

38

I got to give a speech at the University of Louisville today about JWs and Propaganda

by dubstepped in

today my wife and i went to college.

although not allowed to go to college as jws we got to lead a class today and it was really special to be able to do that.

the class was an honors class on social media and psychology and i created a presentation around the propaganda and manipulation used against us as jws.

dubstepped

Thanks QQ. It sure is nice to have friends. :)

38

I got to give a speech at the University of Louisville today about JWs and Propaganda

by dubstepped in

today my wife and i went to college.

although not allowed to go to college as jws we got to lead a class today and it was really special to be able to do that.

the class was an honors class on social media and psychology and i created a presentation around the propaganda and manipulation used against us as jws.

dubstepped

Just in case anyone watched the presentation and was interested in what questions the students may have, here is a video we made to answer the first batch of questions that came our way. I'm pretty sure that the professor has more, but for now:

https://youtu.be/lsHJpGnXLDo

21

It doesn’t make Sense

by HappyBlessedFree in

so my husband and i had a long conversation last night about why i no longer believe.

this is our 10th conversation about all the same things which we have been talking about for the last four months.. he says “you have let yourself be deceived”.

i try my best to show him my sincerity in my motives.

dubstepped

Cognitive dissonance is a $&%)!

The worst are often those that were never fully in, so it doesn't betray them quite the same, or they didn't lose as much, or weren't hurt by it. So they still hold to it. It's like how the more voracious defenders online often were just raised around it and never got the full JW experience.

You'll just have to give him time, if you choose. It doesn't sound like he cares enough to really get into figuring it out. It's just a thing, no big thing, and meh. And if he can't face being wrong then he'll live a long life of denial, wasting his time.