I concur with wizzstick... don't dissasociate. You've hit the jackpot by being allowed to fade and not be DF'd and still keep your wife.
Please do read Steven Hassan's books, such as Releasing the Bonds and Combatting Cult Mind Control BEFORE you try anything with your wife!! Trying to wake up someone is very, very tough, and there are a million wrong ways of doing it!
I can only imagine the pain you must feel of all those wasted years. We all feel this. Even those who woke up "young"... I think everyone who wakes up wishes they had done so earlier.
Can I share your story on a Spanish exJW website?