I was just sent these and feel the sudden urge to share...
> > One for the girls (at last)
> > >
> > > Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain
> > > on the ground?
> > > A. Shoot him again.
> > >
> > > Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
> > > A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the
> > > noose.
> > >
> > > Q. Why do little boys whine?
> > > A. Because they're practicing to be men.
> > >
> > > Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
> > > A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve
> > > around him.
> > > OR Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about
> > > the screwing part.
> > >
> > > Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
> > > A. Trustworthy.
> > >
> > > Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and
> > > calling your name?
> > > A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
> > >
> > > Q. Why does it take 100,000,00 0 sperm to fertilize one egg?
> > > A. Because not one will stop and ask directions.
> > >
> > > Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
> > > A. To stop the snoring before it starts.
> > >
> > > Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
> > > A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
> > >
> > > Q: What is the difference between men and women?
> > > A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need.
> > > A: A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
> > > Q: How does a man keep his youth?
> > > A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.
> > > Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
> > > A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"
> > > Send this to five bright, funny women you know and make their day!! And
> > > send this to five bright
> > > men who have the sense of humor to find this funny!
> > >
> > > P.S. AT LEAST FINDING 5 BRIGHT WOMEN MIGHT BE POSSIBLE