Posts by bisubluvs2

4

Ummmmmmmm

by bisubluvs2 in

part of my story.

my mother had studied off and on even b4 i was born, due to a baptized aunt whom i enjoyed attending meetings with until she moved away...i was about 10 when she left.. i must have been about 5 (that's around the time i met my aunt also...u know she didn't associate with the worldly family) when i attended my first meeting with my mom and started having a regular bible study out of the 'listen to the great teacher'....once that was completed, i never had another personal study and since mom wasn't baptized or even an unbaptized publisher...we weren't regular regulars but we did go often enough and attend all the ca and dc...like i said earlier my mom studied off and on...so we had many off moments, which was fine by me and when she was on, she would have her studies while i was at school... hey, again that was fine by me (lol!).....

i was in the 5th grade the last time mom was on and quite serious about it cause she started scheduling them at the time i got home(this went on for almost 2 years)...u should have seen my face that first day this unwelcomed surprise was sprung on me...not a happy one, fo sho...oh sure i thought many wednesdays (@ 3pm) about not going straight home...but my mama didn't play and although they were the longest 1 hour anythings i've ever had to endure (or so it seemed) i would rather sit through it comfortably, than in pain....u know somethings just ain't worth it...besides, the answers was in the book...not a biggie.

bisubluvs2

stockings r supported by garters...pantyhoses have the panty built in...

4

Ummmmmmmm

by bisubluvs2 in

part of my story.

my mother had studied off and on even b4 i was born, due to a baptized aunt whom i enjoyed attending meetings with until she moved away...i was about 10 when she left.. i must have been about 5 (that's around the time i met my aunt also...u know she didn't associate with the worldly family) when i attended my first meeting with my mom and started having a regular bible study out of the 'listen to the great teacher'....once that was completed, i never had another personal study and since mom wasn't baptized or even an unbaptized publisher...we weren't regular regulars but we did go often enough and attend all the ca and dc...like i said earlier my mom studied off and on...so we had many off moments, which was fine by me and when she was on, she would have her studies while i was at school... hey, again that was fine by me (lol!).....

i was in the 5th grade the last time mom was on and quite serious about it cause she started scheduling them at the time i got home(this went on for almost 2 years)...u should have seen my face that first day this unwelcomed surprise was sprung on me...not a happy one, fo sho...oh sure i thought many wednesdays (@ 3pm) about not going straight home...but my mama didn't play and although they were the longest 1 hour anythings i've ever had to endure (or so it seemed) i would rather sit through it comfortably, than in pain....u know somethings just ain't worth it...besides, the answers was in the book...not a biggie.

bisubluvs2

PART OF MY STORY

My mother had studied off and on even b4 I was born, due to a baptized aunt whom I enjoyed attending meetings with until she moved away...I was about 10 when she left.

I must have been about 5 (that's around the time I met my aunt also...U know she didn't associate with the worldly family) when I attended my first meeting with my mom and started having a regular bible study out of the 'listen to the great teacher'....once that was completed, I never had another personal study and since mom wasn't baptized or even an unbaptized publisher...We weren't regular regulars but we did go often enough and attend all the CA and DC...Like I said earlier my mom studied off and on...so we had many OFF moments, which was fine by me and when she was ON, she would have her studies while I was at school... Hey, again that was fine by me (LOL!)....

I was in the 5th grade the last time mom was ON and quite serious about it cause she started scheduling them at the time I got home(this went on for almost 2 years)...U should have seen my face that first day this unwelcomed surprise was sprung on me...NOT A HAPPY ONE, fo sho...Oh sure I thought many Wednesdays (@ 3pm) about not going straight home...but MY MAMA didn't play and although they were the longest 1 hour anythings I've ever had to endure (or so it seemed) I would rather sit through it comfortably, than in pain....U know somethings just ain't worth it...besides, the answers was in the book...not a biggie.

So my mom passed away during that time, still unbaptized and never doing more than studying and attending meetings..I was 13...I called the lovely sister to inform her Wednesdays @ 3pm was no longer a good time, she asked "So would you like to continue the study?"..."AS IF! I NEVER WANTED TO SIT THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, BBBBBUT U KNOW MY MOTHER AND IT WAS PROBABLY UR IDEA FOR ME TO SIT IN ON IT ANYWAY. U KNOW HOW YA'LL DO!" is what I should've said but I just kindly said "no thank you" with a smile...

Soooooooo my aunt who has been the dub for years came up to visit her fellow dubs during the time we were preparing for mom's services...She stopped by to see if I wanted to move with her...she lived in Maryland....THANK GOODNESS, THANK GOODNESS I had 2 other aunts to choose from...Soooooo my answer was 'no'......she stayed about 10 minutes and mind u, didn't attend the 'wake or funeral' and both was held at the funeral home cause my mom didn't belong to any church...
My mother had done alot for her over those few years, trust and believe me...

So I move in with my other aunt and her dysfunctional family...Which made me appreciate all the more so what my mom was trying to instill in me...and it didn't take long for me to realize...I got pregnant at 18 and told my baby's daddy 'our child would be raised a dub because I wanted her to have morals and everlasting life'(some things don't leave u) he said "NO DA HELL HE/SHE WON'T!"...Well 2 weeks to the day of her birth, he was killed...So @ 21 I started my quest for the knowledge that leads to everlasting life for the sake of my baby girl...rekindled the relationship with my baptized aunt who didn't attend my moms funeral, cause I knew my mom didn't hold grudges and I am trying to be a christian so
why should I, besides that was in the past...

Got baptized the following year...My aunt and her granddaughter who was now a dub, baptized the year b4, came to see me get dunked...The night b4 I almost choked in my sleep (LOL!)...what did that mean?...Auntie Holy and granddaughter Surly stayed with us (my daughter & I) for 2 weeks and during those 2 weeks, mind u I'm freshly baptized and could have been easily discouraged....So I kind of looked up to my auntie at this time cause I'm also stupid and wanted this new thing to work....But there was signs....
I remembered auntie got a phone call from one of her devoted followers...okay...cause that's what they acted like when she came to town...I answered the phone, MY phone......rarely did any of them say "hey, how r you?" but that's neither here nor there but after a few more visits it got to me....anyway...she was in the kitchen cleaning fish....so I say "auntie, the telephone."....
sister holy screams "DAMN IT, CAN'T U SEE I GOT THIS SHIT ON MY HANDS" well, I was shocked.... I said "auntie we're not supposed to swear..."THAT'S NOT SWEARING...IT IS SHIT!"...okay auntie holy.... I took a message and realized auntie wasn't SHITand I decided she was full of shit.... During that stay auntie went to visit some friends, leaving her 18 yo virgin granddaughter at my home...no problem, we were cool and had a great time. When auntie returns she says to me "did u corrupt my granddaughter".... I didn't particularly like that comment but I let it go...they left shortly thereafter....

A week later I received a 'thank you' card and it was nice, ridden with so much spiritual encouragement, that it pissed me off....those would have been great things to say while u were here eating My food and sleeping in My beds but NO, she spent most of it critizing and shooting down with her comments (there was others) and her nasty demeanor so I wasn't feeling her "THANK YOU' bullshit....

a few days later, she calls....Now I've always been a lover of music, especially R & B and my favorites r the mellow/slow ones and dear ole' auntie didn't know this cause she didn't know me....because I was "ZEALOUS" for the 'truth', I did try to stay away rom the ones referring to 'sex' (in the beginning of course)....So auntie calls (b4 caller ID so I didn't know it was her), I answer with some music playing in the background....when I hear it's her, my voice got real flat cause I had no words for her....she noticed and asked what was wrong...I said nothing...then she noticed the music...she tells me to stop listening to that music cause it's depressing me.... at this point, I knew then a nice 'NASTY' letter was necessary cause she had to be told....
U know what I wanted to say while on the phone "NO, IT'S NOT THE MUSIC THAT'S DEPRESSING ME. IT'S UR FAKE ASS." but I didn't and I just let her know in my letter how discouraging and hypocritical I found her to be with examples of her attitude to back it up...and get this...I had brought what I though was pantyhose at a large dept. store but turned out to be stockings, which I don't wear. I know auntie does so I sent them to her along with the 'NASTY, U make me sick" letter.... So a few weeks pass and she usually calls me to thank me for the things I've sent her but I hadn't gotten a call..."Maybe she didn't get the package." I think to myself... So I call her to see..."Hi auntie did u get the stockings?" now her voice is flat and it dawns on me, "she got the letter too"...I had totally forgotten about that letter but I was glad it was out and she knew how I felt and it showed her holy ass like to be the teller not the tellee...Oh she's good for telling others 'WHAT'S ON HER MIND' but being told about herself was not a good thing...so what! deal with it.....
Once it was off my chest, I was done with it. That's why I had forgotten about it and correct me if I'm wrong "but isn't that what christians...no i'm sorry..... REAL christians do?" which is what they claim to be....yeah right!.....

So there was other visits from auntie and each one I knew it wasn't going to last...I loved her and wanted it to work...couldn't see why it couldn't, hell we both christians..striving for the same things...she had more years on me but her reward wasn't going to be any bigger or better, right....SO WHAT THE FUCK WAS HER PROBLEM?....dont' get me wrong, she treated those who weren't her followers like this..so it wasn't just me...

She'd call and say she's coming to town, I'd gladly receive her. At that time, I'd never tell her she couldn't stay with me but each visit worn me out and each visit I got fed up till there was no more ...she would get calls all during the night from her DEAR FRIENDS on MY phone but let me get a call after a certain hour....."I don't know why u allow your friends to call ur house all times of the night...don't they know u work...I know these aren't TRUE witnesses." always had some comment.....I let it go...I would give her and my daughter my queen size bed and I'd sleep in the twin....so the last visit after she had been in the house about an hour, she tells my daughter that she was going to have to sleep in the twin bed with her mother (me) cause auntie (she) was tired....can u imagine....I said "No, she's sleeping in my bed with me and UR sleeping in the twin bed." she said "Oh!"....U damn right "Oh"....talk about lips poked out....and I didn't care....
I knew that washer last visit or stay at my home...When she did call me the next year, I told her it wasn't a good time and she stayed with my worldly aunt around the corner from me....why didn't she stay with one of her follwers, cause many would receive, according to her....I couldn't tell u? I did do my christian duty and go visit while she was there....

Ok I needed to get that out...WHEW! Okay...back to my story....so the letters between auntie and I stop although I made it my business to invite her over for dinner when she came..the last time I saw her was'98'...and the last time I called her was probably the year before that....don't miss her either...I became bored with the while process...I pioneered for a year in '96' and was glad to get off the list...I was bored to tears and miserable...it wasn't working for me..
So I attended my last meeting July of '99' and that was to see my daughter give what may or may not be her finally talk, that will depend on her....That night I told the "elders" I had gotten married.....yes I married a worldy.....they didn't say much cause I told them ONLY what I wanted them to know.......when it became apparent to her (my daughter) that I wasn't going back, cause she was still going....(the back of my house faces the side of the KH...so she didn't need anyone to pick her up and I'd watch for her coming home) it was hard on her...it was all she knew from age 2...and I did the dub thing by not letting her associate with her worldly family, which is still in her best interest and not associate with "bad association" at school....so all her friends were in the KH or were they? Ummmm, who knows.....She did have a hard time with my new decision but soon got over it..... She was able to partcipate in after school activities, which she enjoyed.... She wasn't being invited by any of her so called "friends" at the KH while we were deovte and loyal, sooooooooo..... the "elders" called in '00' for a visit, they came over to invite me to the Memorial....that was the first and last time they bothered with ME....
I was tired of the fakes, fools and phonies....sitting in there being holy and faking....I couldn't do it... so I left.
....anyway I'm not going to retrun no time soon if ever....."I'M DOING FINE"

My biggest problem is sitting amongst 2 or 3 brothers telling them what I've done.....that was something I always had a problem with...Wasn't doing anything while IN...but couldn't do it now either.....So Jah will deal with me accordingly, right....So what else can I do but deal with it...And that is what I will do...

I got tattooed last summer...nothing big. And I will be getting a piercing for my sweetie for valentines...(yup there LOL!)...All I can do is live till I DIE... there was never a guarantee I'd see paradise here on earth anyway.

Thanks for being here so I could share my story.....

6

Newbie

by bisubluvs2 in

hello all... i'm a newbie...first time on this site...a friend of mine who has also left the borg told me about it... while sitting on the phone together, i read some of the stories to her and we had a good laugh...all is true....

bisubluvs2

Hello All... I'm a newbie...first time on this site...A friend of mine who has also left the BORG told me about it... While sitting on the phone together, I read some of the stories to her and we had a good laugh...All is true....