bnThere

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  Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

  by m0nk3y in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

  i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

  this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

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  bnThere

  Dearest Josh, Your story has brought an aching to my heart and many tears to my eyes. You are a very courageous young man, and a very precious possession of our God Jehovah. His love and tender mercies extend way beyond the limits set for it by imperfect people, including well meaning elders at times. I too have struggled all my life with being gay. I even saw my marriage fail because of it. Like you, I too gave out - gave up - concluding that Jah does not care and that a judgment of death was certain. Though I have returned to him with great agony, I still feel like that most days. Your intense anguish is something I can relate to very deeply. Jehovah does love us, but his hands are tied. He has a contract with Satan remember. Satan taunted that we would only serve him out of selfish gain. If Jehovah takes away OUR thorn in the flesh, he should then also have intervened in the deaths of Stephen, John the Baptist and that of Jesus Christ for that matter - and you well know where that would have got us... I completely understand your need for a man's tenderness, since I have my own yearning for what you say you have in your relationship now. I am not urging you to do anything other than to keep praying sincerely to our loving God. If you can't fix the gay thing this side of Armageddon, don't worry about it too much. You do not sound like a wicked man to me. You are merely broken by the curse of imperfection. Your creator will not condemn you to death because of an illness you can not control - as much as he would not condemn a fellow believer sitting in a wheel chair with a spine disorder. If you can't not be gay, then at least try to keep His other laws. Be honest, upright and kind. Show a genuine love for all people. Thank Him every day for the ransom paid by the precious blood of his son and avail yourself of his forgiveness. You will be in my prayers to Jehovah God from this day on my dear brother. May Jehovah show us mercy. With true Christian love, Your brother forever, Damon