rebel8

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Posts by rebel8

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  74

  DC2015 New Release: Brochure "Return to Jehovah" for those who faded/left

  by Designer Stubble in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  it appears that a new 16-page brochure, with the title "return to jehovah" is to be released at the regional convention (dc) this year.

  it would be written specifically for those faded or da/df.chapters are:a letter from the governing body1.

  the lost one i will search for2.

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  rebel8

  They are making a kids' version too.

  It's told from the perspective of Caleb. His 7 friends leave the Borg.

  Chapter 1: Joshua misses meetings after feeling guilty for masturbating. Jehovah is disappointed. And titillated.

  
  

  Chapter 2: Aaron has a Sparlock doll. Demons materialize as a snake while he's drinking his oj. Jehovah is sad.

  
  

  Chapter 3: Rachel wears red lipstick. She doesn't show repentance when the elders try to lovingly counsel her. Jehovah hates that, so he has to have the elders to throw her out the window. And he's titillated.
  

  
  

  Chapter 4: Matthew wears tight pants, and instantly turns gay. Jehovah is disappointed. And titillated.
  

  

  Chapter 5: Esther wears a skirt that shows her kneecaps. She immediately becomes a prostitute. Jehoopla is annoyed. And titillated.

  
  

  Chapter 6: Diana and Peter go on a first date after having met earlier that day at the literature counter in the back of the hall. Their chaperone leaves them together in the car for 5 minutes while he runs to the ATM. They instantaneously have sex. Diana gets pregnant, even after only this single sex interview (like cows). They are forced to have a quickie wedding in Peter's mom's back yard. Jehoho cries.

  
  

  Chapter 7: Luke lounges at Dunkin Donuts instead of watching his literature cart. No one is there to help the angels separate the sheep from the goats. Jehovah is pissed off. Lazy Luke. How is he going to develop his work ethic so he can dig all those graves in Paradise?

  
  
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  26

  why report more partakers?

  by rebel8 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  of all the threads here about the number of partakers increasing, i don't recall theories as to why they report this.

  they could stop reporting numbers altogether or lie.

  instead they say, in essence, "our teachings about end times and heavenly hope are still wrong"..

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  rebel8

  there was a "brother" who started partaking He did this for. Few years until his wife died then he stopped because he wanted to be with her in the new system.

  Excellent--you get a choice of afterlives. Like a menu.
  
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  114

  Why do religious people make claims and then refuse to back them up?

  by Viviane in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  several times over the past few months i have had conversations, both here and in real life, with religious people making all sorts of interesting and conflicting claims.

  i like to know how things work, so generally i will ask questions to net out what i am being told and see if it can be explained and make sense.. for instance, if someone said 2+2=4 and i asked how, there are a variety of ways that could be shown to me, a number line, physical objects being put together, counting on fingers and toes, etc.

  indeed, in my personal life, i often have to explain how certain technologies work, sometimes planned, sometimes off the cuff, from a variety of group sizes to a varying degree of technical expertise.

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  rebel8

  This thread needs some audiovisual aids.

  
  

  
  

  My new favorite meme:

  
  
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  26

  why report more partakers?

  by rebel8 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  of all the threads here about the number of partakers increasing, i don't recall theories as to why they report this.

  they could stop reporting numbers altogether or lie.

  instead they say, in essence, "our teachings about end times and heavenly hope are still wrong"..

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  rebel8

  Still doesn't make sense.

  Why did they start reporting it? To prove Thee End is approaching. We used to get so excited to see the numbers go down every year!
  

  Why keep reporting, when the numbers show we are moving further away from Thee End instead of coming closer?
  
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  7

  JW.Org masturbation video - a sign language translators thoughts

  by Esse quam videri in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the watchtower 'masturbation' video has caused quit a fuss and imo rightly so.

  let me relate an experience that took place almost 40 years ago, in the 1970's.. i was translating for several families who attended our hall from outside the territory.

  the reason they came to our congregation is that i was the only one in the area willing to exert myself to learn the american sign language.

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  rebel8

  Thank you so much for posting this.

  At one point, we were accused of making fun of sign language. I am still SMH that was even a debate. We were mocking a shocking video that shows wts' hypocrisy and lack of a clue about what's appropriate to talk to the flock about.
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  17

  Jehovah Witness man Attacks TSA agent with machete in U.S airport- Made National news

  by Newly Enlightened in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  yes they did say he was a jw in this news report:.

  http://www.nbcnews.com/nightly-news/video/authorities-try-to-determine-new-orleans-airport-machete-attacker-s-motive-416322627620.

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  rebel8

  Yeah. My question: Which is crazier:

  A) you try to kill random strangers

  B) you refuse evidenced-based medical care because people wrote a book claiming an Invisible Bearded Sky Daddy doesn't like it
  
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  23

  U.S. Federal Magistrate Judge, the Honorable B. Dwight Goains, a Jehovah's Witness

  by jwleaks in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the current sitting u.s. federal magistrate judge, in alpine, texas, is a jehovah's witness and is set to retire on november 9, 2015.. .

  link to news article.

  on november 9, the honorable b. dwight goains will retire from an eight-year term serving as the u.s. magistrate judge in alpine, texas.

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  rebel8

  Another crooked judge in the wts. hmm.

  Another one who coerces victims into silence. hmm. So far, he's fitting in.

  Oops though--they don't allow judges in the borganization anymore. Right?
  

  Is this guy really a dub? How is that possible? Dubs eschew jury duty, for Pete's freaking sake.
  
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  61

  KH 1st timer, could use some advice

  by rathernotsay in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey people, .

  i am soon going into a kh for the first time and i could use some advice around etiquette etc.

  i know next to nothing besides the fundamental beliefs of jws, i personally dont believe in any religion, and that stance isnt ever going to change, however i don't want to come across as rude or disrespectful.

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  rebel8

  Jehovah's Witnesses are uncomfortable around hypocrites.
  

  ^another funny post

  I think their collective blood pressure increases when the emblems are passed to visitors. They are SO worried you're going to have a snack.
  
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  26

  why report more partakers?

  by rebel8 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  of all the threads here about the number of partakers increasing, i don't recall theories as to why they report this.

  they could stop reporting numbers altogether or lie.

  instead they say, in essence, "our teachings about end times and heavenly hope are still wrong"..

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  rebel8

  of all the threads here about the number of partakers increasing, i don't recall theories as to why they report this. they could stop reporting numbers altogether or lie. instead they say, in essence, "our teachings about end times and heavenly hope are still wrong".
  
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  59

  what is the best line to say to a JW handing you an invite to the memorial

  by nonjwspouse in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have some ideas, but want more to choose from..

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  rebel8

  thanks, i'll bring the cheez whiz