I don't know if it's a personality thing or what. A person can only have one personality, so I have no idea what it's like to have another. For me, I need to be honest. It is a need I feel in the core of myself.
I was honest about my doubts. I had to do that prep thing with the elder and I was honest then that I wasn't sure this was thee truth.
I was honest during the ass-embly when they had you do the vows. I said 'no' to a few of them, IIRC.
They dunked me anyways, even though I was still a teen and frankly stating to my jw parent, elder and ass-embly attendant that I wasn't sure. But I still feel good that I was honest. In the end, it is one thing they can't ever take away from you, even if they control all other aspects of you.