JHINE:
The bad impression you got from this elder probably saved you from making a mistake.
On the topic of disfellowshipping: if a couple in the JW religion commits ‘immorality’ ..the woman is more likely to be disfellowshipped than the man. Doesn’t matter if she’s ‘repentant’.
As for me: I was never reproved for immorality but was scrutinized like crazy. I was viewed negatively because these people could never get anywhere with me. I wouldn’t quit my full time job and do housecleaning and favors for all the Users in the congregation. This was the ‘role’ they wanted single women to follow. I wasn’t having it..Any single woman who did (if she never got married)..usually ended up impoverished and/or on disability.. This seemed to be a pattern with maybe an exception here and there.
Yes, this is what is held out for women there. (You don’t see this mentioned too much on the forum and I think I am one of few women who comment on this.)
I credit luck and my non-JW upbringing for helping me not to succumb to pressure there and keep my anchor to Reality!