thanks for all of the advice, I'll keep it in mind. I just have never seen any evidence of the JW being a cult, in my friends or their family, which has really surprised me. The only hint I've gotten is Jon's parents telling him that he really needs to drop communication with me, not because I'm a temptation for him, but so that he's not a temptation for me coming into the JW. I'll keep a lookout, and I'm going into this constantly questioning everything (I've always been extremely skeptical of religions as a whole, though always had a belief in God).
leliae
JoinedPosts by leliae
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115
Dating a JW info
by Lady Lee inother than telling a person to run:what do you think a person (who knows nothing about the jws) needs to know if they are getting involved with a jw.what would be helpful to them to end things before they get further involved?what will help them if they decide to go further and marry this jw?what challenges would a non-jw woman have if she gets involved with the jw man?what about having children and the struggles that will develop from that?.
if you think of anything else that would be halpful please add it to the thread.
i would like to have a lot of this info in one thread besides some of the great "dating a jw" threads we already have in the best of section.
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115
Dating a JW info
by Lady Lee inother than telling a person to run:what do you think a person (who knows nothing about the jws) needs to know if they are getting involved with a jw.what would be helpful to them to end things before they get further involved?what will help them if they decide to go further and marry this jw?what challenges would a non-jw woman have if she gets involved with the jw man?what about having children and the struggles that will develop from that?.
if you think of anything else that would be halpful please add it to the thread.
i would like to have a lot of this info in one thread besides some of the great "dating a jw" threads we already have in the best of section.
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leliae
Hm. But, just from what I've observed from apostates comments on why they left the JW are for personal reasons, and a lot of those reasons have to do with the halls they attend and the elders there being more imposing then they really should be... As with any religion, there will be faults in the interpretation from each individual and how they conduct themselves as a follower of such religion. So far, the hall I have been attending has shown nothing but lieniency and understanding, especially seeing how my peers act. I dunno. I just have had no reason to feel that the JW is a cult. I've seen nothing cult-ish so far.
But, to stay on the topic, I have been thinking over this a lot. I know because I am only 18 years old I might seem to young to feel what I do, but I can assure you that I am more mature than what my age says for me, as is the guy I'm involved with. And, so far, the JW are far more fitting for my own beliefs in a Christian religion and I continue to be amazed with their approach. My biggest concern is the Watchtower and it's authority, as well as the foundation of the religion with Charles Taze Russell.
Anyway, I'll take those concerns somewhere else, but I'm having trouble asking my JW friends about my concerns. They aren't giving me the full story. The only one who was accessing my doubts was Jon, the guy that I'm interested in, and understanding why I think the way I do. And now we can't see or speak to each other. I'm just not sure if this approach is the best thing for us. He's the only one I feel I can trust to talk to about my thoughts on the JW, but we can't even communicate anymore. Plus, it's making it harder for me because I want to be with him. Gah.
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115
Dating a JW info
by Lady Lee inother than telling a person to run:what do you think a person (who knows nothing about the jws) needs to know if they are getting involved with a jw.what would be helpful to them to end things before they get further involved?what will help them if they decide to go further and marry this jw?what challenges would a non-jw woman have if she gets involved with the jw man?what about having children and the struggles that will develop from that?.
if you think of anything else that would be halpful please add it to the thread.
i would like to have a lot of this info in one thread besides some of the great "dating a jw" threads we already have in the best of section.
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leliae
thanks, 4JWY. If it gets to that point, in which I see the same faults I hear of in the JW (but haven't seen for myself yet), I may be able to make him see these as well, as he is very smart and I can tell even he isn't as strong of a JW as others I've seen.
I'm having so many conflicting thoughts right now... gah.
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115
Dating a JW info
by Lady Lee inother than telling a person to run:what do you think a person (who knows nothing about the jws) needs to know if they are getting involved with a jw.what would be helpful to them to end things before they get further involved?what will help them if they decide to go further and marry this jw?what challenges would a non-jw woman have if she gets involved with the jw man?what about having children and the struggles that will develop from that?.
if you think of anything else that would be halpful please add it to the thread.
i would like to have a lot of this info in one thread besides some of the great "dating a jw" threads we already have in the best of section.
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leliae
A lot of this is really interesting advice...
I'm currently going through a situation related to this.
I'm a sophomore in college, and an art major. A guy (we'll call him Jon) I had become friends with through so many similar interests introduced me to some of his friends, one of which who asked me if I wanted to go to their "church" and she explained that they're Jehovah's Witnesses. At the time I had decided that I wanted to find a religion of my own and I wasn't going to turn any opportunities down. Jon and I became pretty close and I had a mad crazy crush on him. We're so much alike in personalities and interests, and I'm very attracted to him and who he is. I began going to the meetings and found that I really liked what I saw. I asked Jon and his friends many questions, got them answered, and just about everything made perfect sense to me as far as the JW beliefs go. Jon and I became even closer, spending a lot of time together and talking a lot through emails and on the phone. I received an email that was meant to go to the girl friend of his, telling her that he needs to stop spending time with me. This hurt, but he finally came out and explained to me that he has very strong feelings for me, but he has to back away because he can't date me. We talked more and more about this, decided to kind of "work together against each other" but we didn't want to give up on what we have. I can honestly say I know I won't find someone else like him, and he feels the very same way. In short, I have become more interested in the Witnesses and began studying last week. I feel that the JW are right for me and my personal beliefs. Unfortunately, just about everyone who has seen me and Jon together has been able to figure out that we have feelings for one another. Even his parents. His mom told him that we must stop seeing each other, so that I can come into being a JW on my own for the right reasons, because this scenario is very common, supposedly. It's been almost a week since Jon and I have talked or seen each other, and it's incredibly difficult, as we became very close in such a short time. I feel like, in a perfect world, that he and I will be together if I become a Witness, and that places a lot of pressure on me. But I feel I am doing this for the right reasons, without his influence on my decision to study and eventually become a Witness unelss something turns me away (and I haven't encountered anything yet to do that).
I just thought I'd share my story and I'd really appreciate anyone thoughts on this... I don't want to back away, because I feel something very, very strong with Jon, but this pain will continue for a long time until I become a Witness, if I do. And if I don't... I don't even want to think of that.